RE: Why does it work?

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: Why does it work?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Why does it work?

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Why does it work? - 2/25/2008 3:56:44 PM

SailingBum

Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

sob, sob I need another hankie. I used the box of tissue. Hey! Someone had to cry on this post. Im not in a relationship now and this post is a tear jerker.

Man up dude

BadOne

_____________________________

The beatings will continue until morale improves.

According to SwithNSpanky
We are all so very lucky to have you with us to impart your great wisdom.

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Profile

Post #: 41

RE: Why does it work? - 2/26/2008 6:24:58 PM

gypsygrl

Posts: 1471
Joined: 10/8/2005
From: new york state
Status: offline

I'm answering this with respect to mine and Master's relationship. We're a poly household.

quote:

why do you think you have this good relationship?

Why questions are hard to answer. The stars were in perfect allignment, and we were willing to seize the opportunity that presented itself.

quote:

What lead you to this good relationship in the first place?

Master says theres a reason we were brought together. I tend to be a fatalist about these things.

quote:

What keeps the relationship good for you AND your partner(s).

We click together, understand each other and allow each other room to grow. We also work at making it work and are committed for the long term. We talk alot, but, more importantly, we don't just talk. We tend to be pretty action oriented and make changes when changes need to be made.

For me, one of the most important things is that Master has allowed me to initiate some rituals such as him tucking me in every night (we don't sleep together) that help me maintain connection and enhance my sense of agency so I don't feel helpless. I know that, even as a slave, I'm an active participant in shaping our relationship in a way that makes it sustainable.

ed to add: sorry about the font. something funky happened.

< Message edited by gypsygrl -- 2/26/2008 6:26:37 PM >

_____________________________

“To be happy is to be able to become aware of oneself without fright.” ~Walter Benjamin

(in reply to KnightofMists)

Profile

Post #: 42

RE: Why does it work? - 2/26/2008 6:27:31 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

We are committed to the relationship, not to winning individual disagreements. We have the same moral values. We talk things out without yelling. We like to give each other what is needed. We respect and admire each other in both small and large ways and make a point of telling this frequently.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Profile

Post #: 43

RE: Why does it work? - 2/26/2008 7:49:45 PM

joy2u

Posts: 89
Joined: 2/2/2008
Status: offline

oops, i was just reminded of one of the most important ingredients to the success of my relationship with Master David. It's Laugh, a lot. Having a similar sense of humor is a huge plus and it's wonderful being able to laugh spontaneously with each other. He loves to laugh at me, especially when i am screaming in pain that He's inflicting on me and then, i can't help but laugh, too, even while i am still screaming. Laughter is a huge stress reliever.

So, i guess that makes it 6 L's, including:

Laughing with each other.

joy
Owned servant of Master David

quote:

ORIGINAL: joy2u

The 5 L's:

Listening to each other.
Learning from each other.
Looking out for each other.
Leaning on each other.
Loving each other.

Doing all of these, on a continuous basis, after having started from a point of mutual understanding of what each other was needing, wanting, and expecting from the other and allowing each other room to breath and grow.

joy
Owned servant of Master David

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

why do you think you have this good relationship? What lead you to this good relationship in the first place? What keeps the relationship good for you AND your partner(s).