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Mid-Life :) - 2/24/2008 10:18:08 AM

LotusSong

Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline

I've seen two shows lately that went on and on about how mid-life is
a great time for women. Just last week Oprah had a whole show on how
great menopause will be . . . Puhleeeeeeeze! I've had a few thoughts
of my own and would like to share them with you. Whether you are
pushing 40, 50, 60 (or maybe even just pushing your luck), you'll
probably relate.

Mid-life is when the growth of hair on our legs slows down. This
gives us plenty of time to care for our newly acquired mustache.

In mid-life women no longer have upper arms, we have wing spans. We
are no longer women in sleeveless shirts, we are flying squirrels in
drag.

Mid-life is when you can stand naked in front of a mirror and you
can see your rear without turning around.

Mid-life is when you go for a mammogram and you realize that this is
the only time someone will ask you to appear topless.

Mid-life is when you want to grab every firm young lovely in a tube
top and scream, "Listen honey, even the Roman empire fell and those
will too."

Mid-life brings wisdom to know that life throws us curves and we're
sitting on our biggest ones.

Mid-life is when you look at your know-it-all, beeper-wearing
teenager and think: "For this I have stretch marks?"

In mid-life your memory starts to go. In fact the only thing we can
retain is water.

Mid-life means your Body By Jake includes Legs By Rand McNally ,
more red & blue lines than an accurately scaled map of Wisconsin .

Mid-life means that you become more reflective . . You start
pondering the "big" questions. What is life? Why am I here? How much
Healthy Choice ice cream can I eat before it's no longer a healthy
choice?

But mid-life also brings with it an appreciation for what is
important. We realize that breasts sag, hips expand and chins
double, but our loved ones make the journey worthwhile. Would any of
you trade the knowledge that you have now, for the body you had way
back when?

Maybe our bodies simply have to expand to hold all the
wisdom and love we've acquired.

That's my philosophy and I'm sticking to it!

_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.

Post #: 1

RE: Mid-Life :) - 2/24/2008 10:28:41 AM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

ooh... I like this! :)

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to LotusSong)

Post #: 2

RE: Mid-Life :) - 2/24/2008 11:34:00 AM

HypnoticDan

Posts: 463
Joined: 5/23/2007
Status: offline

If i traded for the body I had back then, I'd have all those years to relearn the same lessons. Works for me!

(in reply to GreedyTop)

Post #: 3

RE: Mid-Life :) - 2/24/2008 8:15:08 PM

JulieorSarah

Posts: 552
Joined: 8/25/2007
Status: offline

I'd like to have the body of 'xx' years ago and know what I know now!

(in reply to HypnoticDan)

Post #: 4

RE: Mid-Life :) - 2/24/2008 8:30:59 PM

TracyTaken

Posts: 615
Joined: 2/1/2008
Status: offline

I loved this post.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

Mid-life is when the growth of hair on our legs slows down. This
gives us plenty of time to care for our newly acquired mustache.

It's not the thinning hair on my legs that freaked me out. Who knew it could happen to pubic hair?

quote:

Would any of you trade the knowledge that you have now, for the body you had way
back when?

No. Learning to let go of a perfect appearance has been a relief. Besides, it was too confusing way back when. Now when I get confused, I don't care so much.

Thanks for a cool post.

< Message edited by TracyTaken -- 2/24/2008 8:31:37 PM >

(in reply to LotusSong)

Post #: 5

RE: Mid-Life :) - 2/25/2008 2:10:03 AM

favesclava

Posts: 1608
Joined: 2/15/2007
Status: offline

every step i took in my crazy life led me to where i am today. i wouldnt change a thing or go back.i like how i've grown up

_____________________________

weird is relative not an absolute term. Baron Frank N. Furter
Resident jingly dancing girl
The Pookie Of Darkness
Okay? Ready? Fine .Here's my hand. We are going now. I know the way. All you have to do is hold on tight ... and believe.SK

(in reply to TracyTaken)

Post #: 6

RE: Mid-Life :) - 2/25/2008 3:28:16 AM

idontknowdou

Posts: 32
Joined: 1/27/2008
Status: offline

i would go back and change alot of things

(in reply to favesclava)

Post #: 7

RE: Mid-Life :) - 2/25/2008 7:32:30 AM

BlackPhx

Posts: 3432
Joined: 11/8/2006
Status: offline

Always wanted to buy a race horse and name her Minnow Pause. I would have loved to hear all the women at the track rooting her on.

Thats not a hot flash that's a mini-tropical vacation.

poenkitten ( glad thats over and done with)

(in reply to LotusSong)

Post #: 8

RE: Mid-Life :) - 2/25/2008 7:45:56 AM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

*sigh* I'm praying for menopause.....

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to BlackPhx)

Post #: 9

RE: Mid-Life :) - 2/25/2008 7:55:01 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

Mid life is when it is 2 degrees outside and you are driving down the freeway with the windows open.

Mid life is when you have the thermostat set at 58 degrees, in January, and can walk around the house barefooted, in a tshirt dress and be comfortable.

Mid life is when you can shovel snow in the above tshirt dress, and flipflops....

Mid life is when you care less what others think about yourself and more what you think about yourself.

Mid life is when you don't care if another woman is more beautiful or has a better body than you.

Mid life is when alot of the, above mentioned women, think you are hot and hit on you....

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to LotusSong)

Post #: 10

RE: Mid-Life :) - 2/25/2008 8:36:58 AM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

that rocks, LaT!!

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to LaTigresse)

Post #: 11

RE: Mid-Life :) - 2/25/2008 8:49:03 AM

favesclava

Posts: 1608
Joined: 2/15/2007
Status: offline

i'm not one of the "above mentioned" women but i also think you're hot LaTigresse

_____________________________

weird is relative not an absolute term. Baron Frank N. Furter
Resident jingly dancing girl
The Pookie Of Darkness
Okay? Ready? Fine .Here's my hand. We are going now. I know the way. All you have to do is hold on tight ... and believe.SK

(in reply to GreedyTop)

Post #: 12

RE: Mid-Life :) - 2/25/2008 8:52:49 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

Why thank you!

Some moments more than others.

Me at work today.....

"Turn the damned heat on! It's flippin freezing in here!"

half an hour later...."Jesus Christ, who is the reptile in this bunch? It's like a damned sauna in this building!"

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to favesclava)

Post #: 13

RE: Mid-Life :) - 2/25/2008 9:06:41 AM

LotusSong

Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

*sigh* I'm praying for menopause.....

Alas.. with menopause comes bladder issues...

_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.

(in reply to GreedyTop)

Post #: 14

RE: Mid-Life :) - 2/25/2008 9:09:48 AM

LotusSong

Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

Mid life is when it is 2 degrees outside and you are driving down the freeway with the windows open.

Mid life is when you have the thermostat set at 58 degrees, in January, and can walk around the house barefooted, in a tshirt dress and be comfortable.

Mid life is when you can shovel snow in the above tshirt dress, and flipflops....

Mid life is when you care less what others think about yourself and more what you think about yourself.

Mid life is when you don't care if another woman is more beautiful or has a better body than you.

Mid life is when alot of the, above mentioned women, think you are hot and hit on you....

Yeeeee-up! This is so true! Thanks LaT :)

I can't remember where I heard it but: "I'm not having a hot flash! .. I'm having a personal Summer".

< Message edited by LotusSong -- 2/25/2008 9:11:19 AM >

_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.

(in reply to LaTigresse)

Post #: 15

RE: Mid-Life :) - 2/25/2008 9:11:41 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

*sigh* I'm praying for menopause.....

Alas.. with menopause comes bladder issues...

OMG Yes!!!

me "Omg I am going to sneeze, get out of my way!!!" (as I run to the bathroom.............)

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to LotusSong)

Post #: 16

RE: Mid-Life :) - 2/25/2008 9:14:04 AM

LadyRainfire

Posts: 6040
Joined: 2/20/2008
Status: offline

LMAO.... So glad to see I'm not the only one around here. My monsters, errrr, human kids yell at me that I haven't turned the heat on in my bedroom in years and call my bedroom the freezer. But it's the only way I can sleep. And while I wouldn't trade the wisdom one bit, I wouldn't mind some of the young body back. I found a stretch mark the other day where I didn't even know you could get them. Sheeesh....

Love the humour.. Definitely a keeper!

_____________________________

"Desire is an insatiable beast. Sample your strongest dreams, and you will only crave more." ~ Master

~ one half of "L&L"~

My current state of mind

(in reply to LaTigresse)

Post #: 17

RE: Mid-Life :) - 2/25/2008 9:39:39 AM

Saratov

Posts: 1716
Joined: 10/22/2005
Status: offline

Have heard of 'Hot Flashes' refered to as Power Surges. Not sure which is worse for the poor innocents living with her, pms or menopause.

(in reply to LadyRainfire)

Post #: 18

RE: Mid-Life :) - 2/25/2008 10:24:28 AM

BlackPhx

Posts: 3432
Joined: 11/8/2006
Status: offline

There are no innocents during either of those periods of a womans' life... only prey.

poenkitten

(in reply to Saratov)

Post #: 19

RE: Mid-Life :) - 2/25/2008 10:26:06 AM

BlackPhx

Posts: 3432
Joined: 11/8/2006
Status: offline

The good news and bad news about stretch marks..they don't tan, which means that you look like a tiger when the rest of you does. GRRRRRROOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWLL

poenkitten

(in reply to LadyRainfire)

Post #: 20

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