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mystiquenz -> RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom (2/25/2008 11:38:06 PM)
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Welcome to the boards, and watch the first ice cream cone come your way. They can be addictive and they can be frustrating and a lot of fun. Consider it a banquet and a smorgesboard at that. Consider that you can learn from others' experiences, and develop your own tastes along the way.
Finding a submissive or a dominant depending on where you are in the spectrum, or maybe a switch, if that's your cup of tea, is entirely the luck of the gods. I have recently met a dominant that i am exploring and it was not from this site. Different irons in different fires i think is the expression. CM and others generally attract the same pool. Be aware that some people use different nicks on different profiles which I find to be a bit deceiving.
I would encourage you to continue attending local mnches and keep one foot in the real time environment and the other online. Investing time persuing what you consider are the options which will bring you what you desire. A tad like going fishing, how good is your bait, how good is your fly, which way does the wind blow. One group of people may rock your boat, and another group of people may not. It does not overly matter, you cannot get on with everyone no matter how hard you try.
Sofaras labels are concerned, I have recently had this conversation with some one local who asked the question, why do people use terminologies like bottom, sub, slave, Top, Dom and Master. A good question from one who has an enquiring mind. Labels help define what you are. You may only want to "Top" on occasion as opposed to entering into a D/s or M/s relationship. It tells the enquiring mind that you are a dom, and you understand the difference. The people who lack imagination, are the people in my view, that use Master xyz. They may be a Master of their girl or boy, it may be a name that is bestowed on them by others, but it is normally one that is earned out of respect. If you have used "Dom" in your name to identify who and what you are, which reading from your profile I believe that that is the situation, then congratulations. You are also cutting out time wasting measures. Some girls may only be interested in switches, or tops.
I congratulate for one so young, to have made an articulated effort with your profile. I hope that someone in your local community will take you under their wing and will mentor you and teach you and in time you will gain the experience that you seek.
Take no notice of the grumps on this site who have attacked you. It is a mere reflection of their insecurities rather than being friendly and offering a hand in friendship, sharing knowledge and expertise with a fledgling.
mystique wishes you every success on your journey and she hopes that you find what you seek. Take each step slowly, savour the moments as they present themselves and find natural balance in your approach.
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