RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom

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RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 8:30:20 PM

bamabbwsub

Posts: 566
Joined: 5/28/2007
Status: offline

quote:

I don't find your profile to be a 'know it all' profile at all.

I also agree with this. I thought Your profile was relatively well-written and even, as Your name suggests, somewhat eloquent.

I think perhaps what You might need is just a little patience. CM has oodles (that means "lots!") of members, many of them un-collared and looking for the same things that You are. I, myself, am one of them, except that I could've given birth to You and therefore I'm not interested in that kind of relationship with someone Your age. :)

Patience, Grasshopper! Take the advice of people here who have eventually, after time, found exactly what they were looking for, whether it was via CM, alt.com, munches, or other venues.

Best of luck to You!

_____________________________

"Everyone is normal until you get to know them." - Dave Sim

I rescue animals. My pockets and gas tank are always empty. My home is always hairy and my inbox full of sadness, but my heart is full when seeing those that are saved.

(in reply to SailingBum)

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Post #: 21

RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 8:58:29 PM

MstrssScarlet

Posts: 633
Joined: 6/3/2005
From: Indianapolis, Indiana
Status: offline

I met my husband online, but most of the people I met online (potential ltr material) were jerks. I've met a lot of people at munches, sloshes, parties, and fetish events. I've met some great people, and again some real jerks. LOL
I tend to agree with those who have suggested you try a little of everything. I don't see anything wrong with your profile. Very well written. Once you get a picture up (I see that one is pending), you will be amazed at how the emails will increase.
If you're interested, there's a big fetish event coming up in Cincinnati right after Easter (if they keep with tradition). It's called Antything for Love. I've been two years in a row and always enjoyed it immensely. If you're interested, drop me a line and I'll send you the link as soon as they announce when they're going to have it.
Although I met my husband online, I personally feel there's nothing like meeting people in the flesh. Just my opinion.
Mistress Scarlet

_____________________________

"Say, that hurts a little bit" "And you don't like to be hurt do ya?" "I don't know...kinda fun sometimes if it's done in the right spirit."
Jean Harlow in The Beast of the City

(in reply to bamabbwsub)

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Post #: 22

RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 11:03:39 PM

BitaTruble

Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline

I like your profile and sn as well and think it's rather telling that the women here seem to like it while some of the men don't. Hmm. ::winks::

I would suggest getting involved in your local community, network, post on the forums and let people here get to know you a bit and who knows, maybe a friend of a friend and some good old fashioned dumb luck will help you find the girl of your dreams.

Also, attend some BDSM events (classes, lectures, demos) if you're able and you know, keep it all real. Once you do find a young lady in whom you are interested, take your time and let nature take its course.

Good luck. Hope to see you and your eloquent self around the forums.

Celeste

< Message edited by BitaTruble -- 2/25/2008 11:05:08 PM >

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."

(in reply to AnEloquentDom)

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Post #: 23

RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/25/2008 11:38:06 PM

mystiquenz

Posts: 330
Joined: 8/13/2004
Status: offline

Welcome to the boards, and watch the first ice cream cone come your way. They can be addictive and they can be frustrating and a lot of fun. Consider it a banquet and a smorgesboard at that. Consider that you can learn from others' experiences, and develop your own tastes along the way.

Finding a submissive or a dominant depending on where you are in the spectrum, or maybe a switch, if that's your cup of tea, is entirely the luck of the gods. I have recently met a dominant that i am exploring and it was not from this site. Different irons in different fires i think is the expression. CM and others generally attract the same pool. Be aware that some people use different nicks on different profiles which I find to be a bit deceiving.

I would encourage you to continue attending local mnches and keep one foot in the real time environment and the other online. Investing time persuing what you consider are the options which will bring you what you desire. A tad like going fishing, how good is your bait, how good is your fly, which way does the wind blow. One group of people may rock your boat, and another group of people may not. It does not overly matter, you cannot get on with everyone no matter how hard you try.

Sofaras labels are concerned, I have recently had this conversation with some one local who asked the question, why do people use terminologies like bottom, sub, slave, Top, Dom and Master. A good question from one who has an enquiring mind. Labels help define what you are. You may only want to "Top" on occasion as opposed to entering into a D/s or M/s relationship. It tells the enquiring mind that you are a dom, and you understand the difference. The people who lack imagination, are the people in my view, that use Master xyz. They may be a Master of their girl or boy, it may be a name that is bestowed on them by others, but it is normally one that is earned out of respect. If you have used "Dom" in your name to identify who and what you are, which reading from your profile I believe that that is the situation, then congratulations. You are also cutting out time wasting measures. Some girls may only be interested in switches, or tops.

I congratulate for one so young, to have made an articulated effort with your profile. I hope that someone in your local community will take you under their wing and will mentor you and teach you and in time you will gain the experience that you seek.

Take no notice of the grumps on this site who have attacked you. It is a mere reflection of their insecurities rather than being friendly and offering a hand in friendship, sharing knowledge and expertise with a fledgling.

mystique wishes you every success on your journey and she hopes that you find what you seek. Take each step slowly, savour the moments as they present themselves and find natural balance in your approach.

_____________________________

blessings
~mystique~

(in reply to AnEloquentDom)

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Post #: 24

RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/26/2008 3:00:35 AM

Justme696

Posts: 3236
Joined: 1/7/2008
From: Royal kingdom of the Netherlands
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AnEloquentDom

I completly agree with what you're saying. I have alot of knowledge of the theory behind BDSM, but not very much when it comes to the more practical aspects. Getting to know someone, and finding a relationship is something I want more than anything. Thus, I wouldn't say I'm looking for a MATE, just someone who I connect with on multiple levels, BDSM or otherwise.

That is the best period...discovering your self in the practical aspects.
Posting here often..will make you known to people...and people start to look at your profile.

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~Been there, done that, got the t-shirt

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Post #: 25

RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/26/2008 4:35:07 AM

ruthiexxxx

Posts: 78
Joined: 1/29/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AnEloquentDom

So I am new to Collarme, but I am enjoying it quite a bit. However, I'm curious if using Collarme is the best way to find a submissive woman. It seems that most of the women on this site are collared currently, so it seems that finding an uncollared sub might be hard on this site. So I suppose what I am asking, are there other routes a new Dom can take to meet and find uncollared subs around my age?

looked a good enough profile to me. if i were a young woman in america i'd be tempted to find out more! i dont know how different it is to find women subbies but i've found a very tasty young man subbie from CM............thank you universe.

(in reply to AnEloquentDom)

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Post #: 26

RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/26/2008 10:52:44 AM

SireKane

Posts: 105
Joined: 1/22/2004
Status: offline

I suggest you google goth/fetish events in your area. Find some events and go to them. You'll find a lot of cute young submissives with your level of experience.

Kane

(in reply to AnEloquentDom)

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Post #: 27

RE: Best way to find a submissive for a new Dom - 2/27/2008 7:21:36 PM

MstrssScarlet

Posts: 633
Joined: 6/3/2005
From: Indianapolis, Indiana
Status: offline

"Take no notice of the grumps on this site who have attacked you. It is a mere reflection of their insecurities rather than being friendly and offering a hand in friendship, sharing knowledge and expertise with a fledgling. "

I agree 100%. The people on this site are not always as helpful or welcoming to newcomers as they should be.
An excellent post mystiquenz!

Mistress Scarlet

<<<edited because I can't spell worth a damn today.>>>

< Message edited by MstrssScarlet -- 2/27/2008 7:30:15 PM >

_____________________________

"Say, that hurts a little bit" "And you don't like to be hurt do ya?" "I don't know...kinda fun sometimes if it's done in the right spirit."
Jean Harlow in The Beast of the City

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Post #: 28