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RE: What do you require of your sub/slave? - 2/27/2008 10:49:19 AM   
OmegaG


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Forgive me, you didn't say he was cheating, you asked if he was trying to take the easy route.

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RE: What do you require of your sub/slave? - 2/27/2008 10:51:54 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Drummerpunk7

sex kinda goes without saying. Although, on that line of thought, is there anything sexual that you require of a sub/slave beyond just giving it up?

you assume too much that each relationship is based on sex and/or the submissive/slave has to give up something. 

unlike yours, mine with Daddy doesn't include sex since we have a ldr. plus i didn't give up anything except my submission in which i was happy to offer Him.


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RE: What do you require of your sub/slave? - 2/27/2008 10:51:59 AM   
RedMagic1


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And no way in hell does sex "go without saying."  There are lots of BDSM relationships that involve no penetration, nothing that vanillas would call overtly sexual.  Erotic, you bet.  You had better discuss sex with anyone you're going to be involved with -- get a sense of her limits, and your own.

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Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
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RE: What do you require of your sub/slave? - 2/27/2008 10:56:20 AM   
MistressOfGa


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quote:

ORIGINAL: OmegaG

Forgive me, you didn't say he was cheating, you asked if he was trying to take the easy route.

Yes. And to me, it isn't the same thing as accusing someone of cheating. I don't play with words, I say what I mean. If I wanted to accuse him of cheating, I would have said it. Not implied it.  But.. you are forgiven :)

MoGa

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RE: What do you require of your sub/slave? - 2/27/2008 10:58:13 AM   
MistressOfGa


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quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

And no way in hell does sex "go without saying."  There are lots of BDSM relationships that involve no penetration, nothing that vanillas would call overtly sexual.  Erotic, you bet.  You had better discuss sex with anyone you're going to be involved with -- get a sense of her limits, and your own.

Exactly.

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RE: What do you require of your sub/slave? - 2/27/2008 11:04:20 AM   
Mercnbeth


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~ FAST REPLY ~
 
Never being a person who takes one comment as an isolated absolute I was wondering how the phase "goes without saying" impacts those who on another thread said they'd prefer to "keeping cards close"? Where I playing that game I'd have to wonder how the issue of sex is addressed. Is sex a 'card' who's suit you'd show "without saying" but keep the value "close" until your partner shows his/hers first?

Wow - OP, if you really expect to learn from any of this you have a LOT of "what if...." reconciling to do! 

Much too complicated for me! I'm glad that in yet another thread someone has already begun to write all this out and publish 'Rules' for everyone.

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RE: What do you require of your sub/slave? - 2/27/2008 11:05:35 AM   
SailingBum


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Justme696


no...just like to throw gasoline on the fire
seriously..BDSM involves often..sex..but it gets hardly mentioned...so I was curious about reactions




My reaction to sex.  I enjoi every single moment of it.

BadOne



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RE: What do you require of your sub/slave? - 2/27/2008 11:12:11 AM   
Justme696


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quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum

quote:

ORIGINAL: Justme696


no...just like to throw gasoline on the fire
seriously..BDSM involves often..sex..but it gets hardly mentioned...so I was curious about reactions






My reaction to sex.  I enjoi every single moment of it.

BadOne




and your partners ;)   you rock their boat I guess :P



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RE: What do you require of your sub/slave? - 2/27/2008 11:13:43 AM   
hopelessfool


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Well, I know Im a submissive, but my owners usually require general things of the me. Obedience, to keep my grumbling about dislike of a task low enough that he doesn't hear it. To follow the orders given in the time given. Some are strict, and have rules such as " You must pee with the bathroom door open so I can make sure your following the given rules" (Rule was No touchy touchy.) Some are silly, like if you cook chicken you must wear a skirt and do the hokey pokey while its cooking. (he enjoyed me prancing about) Each dom is different.

As for sex, Its going to sound horrible, but, I have a few, well known, I guess they would be requirements for my Dom. If I dont get some, Im very cranky, as well my period tends to be alot worse in the cramping department. So for His benifit, 3 times a week, a load in the morning to wake up to something tasty, and 2 times with a toy.

I serve better because Im not cranky and not focused on the one part of my atonomy. Hes happier because he doesnt have to order me to do laundry as often, (leave damp spots) And in general life is a very content place ^_^;;

But again to each their own, some do not allow their subs any type of pleasure because serving is their pleasure. Some enjoy tormenting. Some dont want a sexual sub at all and just want the control. Some, its all about the sex n.n;;.

-la Kitten

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RE: What do you require of your sub/slave? - 2/27/2008 11:34:35 AM   
SailingBum


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From: Sailin the stormy sea
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Justme696

quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum

quote:

ORIGINAL: Justme696


no...just like to throw gasoline on the fire
seriously..BDSM involves often..sex..but it gets hardly mentioned...so I was curious about reactions






My reaction to sex.  I enjoi every single moment of it.

BadOne




and your partners ;)   you rock their boat I guess :P




I remember it vividly.  As I was undressing she took a look and said "who are you going to please with that little thing."
My reply....  "ME"

BadOne

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We are all so very lucky to have you with us to impart your great wisdom.

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RE: What do you require of your sub/slave? - 2/27/2008 2:17:57 PM   
RedMagic1


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth
Is sex a 'card' who's suit you'd show "without saying" but keep the value "close" until your partner shows his/hers first?

I posted on the "cards" thread too.  My answer to your question is this: I speak frankly -- and demand frank speech -- about our mutual sexual boundaries.  Once I am as clear as I can be about those boundaries, I try to construct scenes that are as creative and surprising as possible.  I see no benefit in holding back important information.  I might get hurt?  I'll get hurt a lot more if I blow away my sub -- or myself -- after I'm more emotionally invested in the relationship.  The information I withold is in the category of not telling you what I got you for your birthday, because surprises are more special and more fun.


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Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

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RE: What do you require of your sub/slave? - 2/27/2008 2:27:21 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Drummerpunk7
sex kinda goes without saying

You're going to get ito trouble with those assumptions.  There are many Ds relationships without any kink or any sex involved at all.  Do not equate them.

quote:

 Although, on that line of thought, is there anything sexual that you require of a sub/slave beyond just giving it up?

It's quite common to demand blow jobs in the morning.

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RE: What do you require of your sub/slave? - 2/27/2008 2:51:15 PM   
Padriag


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Drummerpunk7

A question to masters out there, if it isn't too personal:

What do you require of your submissive/slave? What are your rules? What are your disciplines? To what degree is your power exchange?

Here's my short answer since I still have a lot to do this evening and not much time to post.

Obedience.

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RE: What do you require of your sub/slave? - 2/28/2008 12:22:17 AM   
robertolapiedra


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Drummerpunk7

A question to masters out there, if it isn't too personal:

What do you require of your submissive/slave? What are your rules? What are your disciplines? To what degree is your power exchange?


Hello Drummerpunk7. I have been in my present DS relationship for the last 8 years. My sub and I are married and have a family together. My wife thinks she is a "slave", I think she is a sub. My sub is definitely a sex slave but she sort of comes down a notch or two in the day to day stuff. The TPR is not the romantic "total" 100-0 kind.

-I require obedience (the "final say" kind not the "micro managed robot" kind).

-Rule number one: No mind fucking (the "destructive mean kind" not the "playful" kind), be honest and forthcoming.   Rule number two: Ask permission even when you know I will say yes (can't remember if I ever said no to a request!).

-Disciplines? Discipline. Protocols for when in intimacy. Making coffee. Running household in a reasonable "economy" mode. "Count your blessings" mindset (for both of us, always say "thank you" to one another).

-Degree? Family matters 65-35. Daily matters 60-40. Love 50-50. Sex 98.25-1.75 (my sub wants 0, but I get tired!)

RL

Edit: changed a number.


< Message edited by robertolapiedra -- 2/28/2008 12:25:00 AM >

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RE: What do you require of your sub/slave? - 2/28/2008 1:15:30 PM   
Lumus


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quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

It's quite common to demand blow jobs in the morning.



Not to side track, just asking for my own curiosity...do female Dommes have the same desires/requirements in regards to "morning oral rituals"?



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