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Fmm relationships - 3/3/2008 10:48:50 AM   
SeductiveLady


Posts: 3
Joined: 2/26/2008
Status: offline 		I wasn't sure whether to post this in the Poly forum or here, so my apologies if it should have been the latter.

In the past, I have been in monogomous BDSM relationships, but my ideal has always been a long-term Fmm relationship where the dynamics would be "top and bottom" in the sexual realm, rather than BDSM dynamics throughout the entire relationship (although I would definitely be open to carrying other aspects of that into the relationship).

I'm also not necessarily looking for a cuckolding relationship, however there could be some of those dynamics involved as well. Cuckolding definitely appeals to me, however it would have to be based on a fidelitous relationship between the three of us.

As someone who is newer in pursuing this, I have not found many men that would be interested in this type of a relationship on other sites. I have found men that were interested in Fmm relationships but were not interested in having any sexual contact with the other man (something which is definitely a want for me, as I love to guide all processes sexually). For those that were interested in cuckolding, most were interested in me pursuing men outside of the relationship (which definitely doesn't work for me). Basically, I've found those that are looking for poly relationships, or for cuckolding ones (with a heavy distinction between the two), when I have been looking for a combination of the two being merged.

My questions are: are there many people on here that are in relationships like this on here? are there many people that are interested in these types of dynamics? I've been at a bit of a loss at how to go about pursuing it because of the distinction between poly and cuckolding relationships, and finding those that would be interested in both.
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RE: Fmm relationships - 3/3/2008 11:26:51 AM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline 		Fmm?

It's appearing too many times to be a typo.  Am I to assume you're talking about a female and two males?  Not all of us here are poly folks or familiar with the language that you're speaking.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to SeductiveLady)
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RE: Fmm relationships - 3/3/2008 11:36:54 AM   
SeductiveLady


Posts: 3
Joined: 2/26/2008
Status: offline 		Sorry, yes, a female with 2 males. :)

(in reply to MisPandora)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Fmm relationships - 3/3/2008 12:16:10 PM   
Shawn1066


Posts: 987
Joined: 10/7/2007
Status: offline 		I guess I'm technically in a Fmm relationship of some form...  My Owner owns Angel and myself.  I am her romantic partner as well as her slave.  Her relationship with Angel is neither romantic or sexual.  There's a pseudo-cuckholding dynamic to all of it, because of the fact that their relationship is neither romantic nor sexual.  He and I are kept very seperate, and we've never met one another.  None of us three have any desire to interact together in such a manner.  It works pretty well for us.  I'd say that it works so well because, with the exception of time, there's really nothing either of us can take from one another, so to speak.  So there's really no underlying competitiveness.  We never really interfere with one another's time either.  So, it's all nice and peaceful, really.  That's really the only way such a dynamic could work for me, personally.

DV's Fox


(in reply to SeductiveLady)
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RE: Fmm relationships - 3/3/2008 12:37:28 PM   
MsIncontrol


Posts: 261
Joined: 10/3/2007
Status: offline 		I am seeking the exact same relationship.  I think it takes time to find a third no matter what the sex is.  There are so many variables and so many obstacles that can make it a frustrating experience...but one I am willing to be patient to find.

I've been seeking actively since Sept.  I have no problems finding men who want to be my submissives or play partners but would like it to be separate from my primary relationship.  I also have no problem finding men who would like to be "forced" into bisexuality...but have no interest in an on-going relationship. I have also found a slew of men who want to be kept as a slave and/or houseboy and serve both myself and my husband but not be a contributor outside the house. However,  I have yet to find the one to fulfill the role I seek. Which is a submissive partner who will enjoy his submission to me and be equally comfortable serving along side of or together with my submissive husband.

The few men I have found that are interested in a poly-situation are far and few between and then finding one who is compatible to me and my husband has been difficult.  Not too many people are jumping up to be third. 

I am just practicing patience and letting things happen as organically as possible, but I know my guy is out there..somewhere.

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Happiness is only real when shared. - Christopher McCandless

(in reply to SeductiveLady)
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RE: Fmm relationships - 3/3/2008 12:49:36 PM   
sublimnity


Posts: 4
Joined: 9/28/2006
Status: offline 		Sure I would probably be interested in that type relationship.

(in reply to MsIncontrol)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Fmm relationships - 3/3/2008 3:05:55 PM   
petpete


Posts: 677
Joined: 7/6/2007
Status: offline 		i never thought i would get involved in a poly... But somehow i have found a great interest to serve a Lady that does live in poly. Most of the Mistress's i have come across are in poly (they probably know how to realm better, smiles..) Anyway i don't really have a great desire to meet the rest of Her partners as long as i know that i can accomplish my obligation to Her and know that she is happy with me. On the other hand it does intrigue me of what the dynamics are between the other submissives. It helps me to know of Her better and of what She likes.

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Chief: Max, you realize you'll be facing every kind of danger imaginable.
Max: And loving it!


(in reply to sublimnity)
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RE: Fmm relationships - 3/3/2008 4:24:58 PM   
MmeGigs


Posts: 706
Joined: 1/26/2008
Status: offline 		This is something we've been talking about for a long time.  We think that we could be very happy with a live-in poly relationship, but over time our thinking about what this would look like has changed quite a bit. 

We're not going to be poly-fidelitous  - my Al and I aren't exclusive now, and I don't see that changing, in fact I see us getting more non-exclusive once we have the time to get out more.  The person who becomes our third will have to be practical, handy, and low maintenance, because anyone who wasn't would be miserable with us.  They'll have to have a job with benefits, and they'll have to love my grandkids because they live next door. 

I always figured our third would be a het submale.  My Al isn't bi, so I figured this would be more comfortable for all of us.  Few malesubs who contact me are interested in the kind of relationship I'm looking for.  They want a casual relationship, and can't see getting serious about a married woman.  I don't blame them.  It will be a weird way to live, and difficult to explain to family and friends.   As we've been pondering this more and thinking about people we know and people we've come across here and elsewhere, we're not so sure about what kind of person will be the best match for us.  

Since we're non-exclusive, het isn't a requirement.  If our fella is bi, he'll get as much opportunity as he needs to express that.  When it comes right down to it, male isn't really a requirement, either.  It would be a hell of a lot of fun to have a female partner who was my sub and my Al's dom.  I'm not really bi or bi-curious, but I'm not completely het, either (generally speaking, girls kiss WAY better than boys do), and I really love co-topping my Al.  He could sure use someone to help him around the house.  I'm sure that I could be completely happy with a woman who was right for me/us. 

I suspect that I'll be looking for a while, but I have no doubt that eventually I'll find the person (or people) who will fit happily into my household.  At this point, I have no idea at all what that's going to look like.

(in reply to SeductiveLady)
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RE: Fmm relationships - 3/3/2008 4:26:19 PM   
Lashra


Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline 		I have always wanted two husbands since I was very young so yes this relationship type would definitely appeal to me. The only problem is finding two males willing to enter into this type of relationship. Most males desire a FFM style, while Im not totally against that, for some reason the later seems to appeal more to me.

~Lashra


_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”






(in reply to SeductiveLady)
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RE: Fmm relationships - 3/3/2008 4:34:00 PM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		AS Fox has already said, we are somewhat involved in a Fmm relationship. Angel is not nearly as involved as Fox, but they are both big parts of my life. While it might happen that they meet eventually, they will never be involved with one another on more than perhaps a platonic basis. I have no interest in that, nor do either of them.
Angel's interest is in cuckolding. HE likes being degraded while listening to the things Fox and I do get involved in. It was partially his interest in this that prompted me to go out and find someone, hence meeting and collaring Fox.
When I met Fox, poly was a hard limit of his. He couldnt imgine sharing. Now, it is just a rather regular way of doing things.  He is comfortable in his place with me, as well as Angels. Neither want any more or less from me, or do they want anything to change with the other.

DV


_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to Lashra)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Fmm relationships - 3/3/2008 5:10:53 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		I think what you might be referring to would be a mfm relationship, rather than fmm.  Generally, the designation is different, depending on which partner is the 'center' of attention, so to speak.  If the two males aren't necessarily expected to interact sexually with one another, the focus of those activities is would be the female in the situation, regardless of role. 

I seem to have My share of luck finding candidates, though My situation is a bit different than yours.  None of what is in My current poly family is based on cuckholding.  It's just not My kink.  Much like I think you are saying, there isn't a big appeal for Me to go outside of My poly family for sex.  My casual BDSM play partners know the boundries of this. 

My advice to you is patience.  Expect to hear from a lot of males who are really only looking for the sex on this one, but when you weed through those, you'll find someone who fits just what you're looking for.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)
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RE: Fmm relationships - 3/4/2008 1:03:57 AM   
KindLadyGrey


Posts: 358
Joined: 11/6/2007
Status: offline 		I can be involved with multiple boys separately, but I don't know if I could handle two at the same time. They would probably conspire against me and I would be doomed ;)

I'm not into the forced homosexuality thing, but I have to admit that if I came home to two of my boys voluntarily kissing on the couch I'd find that pretty damn hot.

I've had more fantasies of things the other way around: I want a dominant partner in crime. FFm is more my style.

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Fmm relationships - 3/4/2008 1:22:41 AM   
onthenosetone


Posts: 118
Joined: 7/22/2006
Status: offline 		Very happy where I am and where i've been for this past 14 years with my Ma'am.....if ever she tired of me and I became single then this type of relationship is exactly what i'd look for, probably for me along the lines of some MM contact at Ma'am's direction, and over and above that the other M as Ma'am's lover me as her cuckold slave......

(in reply to KindLadyGrey)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Fmm relationships - 3/4/2008 3:01:44 AM   
chezzy52


Posts: 220
Joined: 6/26/2007
Status: offline 		Poly is something i thought about once for about 24 hours..and then i killed it.I am not cut out to share period,

(in reply to onthenosetone)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Fmm relationships - 3/4/2008 4:37:11 AM   
LadyJeelys


Posts: 99
Joined: 11/17/2007
Status: offline 		I am definitely interested in such a relationship as is my slave.

Again, I'm not sure its so difficult to find guys who are interested.....the problem seems to be finding guys who are interested who mesh with my personality and my slave's personality.

Lots of great men out there, just not all of those great guys are "the" guy that will work.

(in reply to chezzy52)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Fmm relationships - 3/4/2008 4:00:47 PM   
SeductiveLady


Posts: 3
Joined: 2/26/2008
Status: offline 		Sorry, I've been offline for a bit, but thank you to everyone for replying and for your experiences.

PetPete, haha, dangit, I knew I had to learn to realm better.  

MsInControl, I can certainly relate to what you said about being able to find submissive play partners, but not ones that would be willing to be involved in the type of role that you're looking for. I've found it a struggle to even find one person who is open to eventually to bringing in a third for that type of a role. Most men I have found have expressed the same interests as PetPete, they'd like to be involved with me on a play basis, but not long-term, and really have no desire to be involved with the other man. There doesn't necessarily have to be a deeper intimacy between them, but I am interested in both of their submission to me, and them having lots of sexual contact with one another.

Lashra, yes, yes, yes!

LadyPact, thank you for the advice, and apparently I'm in the wrong area (already knew that when it comes to a kink community). What are the chances of you throwing some of your luck across the Canadian border . Whereas I am not necessarily looking for a poly family based on cuckolding, but I would incorporate some aspects of that at times.

KindLadyGrey, I'm with you on the "not into forced homosexuality" thing. Watching and interacting with the two men who are enjoying one another is a huge appeal for me, same as forcing and directing certain acts.

quote:

LadyJeelys: Lots of great men out there, just not all of those great guys are "the" guy that will work.


Well said. I guess my main dilemma is where/how to go about finding a partner that I am looking for. There's really no kink community in my area so my search has been limited to online. Online, I've found those interested in either poly without the other aspects, or those interested in cuckolding (open to me being with another man, but not in an exclusive relationship between the three of us- and with the focus more on me being sexual with the other man- rather than all three being active participants with perhaps a little bit of cuckolding dynamics thrown in). C'est la vie for those of us wanting our cake and to eat it to. I'm just not sure which are to cast my nets in (the poly community, or those who lean towards cuckolding).




(in reply to SeductiveLady)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Fmm relationships - 3/6/2008 12:09:54 PM   
solvr70


Posts: 425
Joined: 8/8/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SeductiveLady

Watching and interacting with the two men who are enjoying one another is a huge appeal for me, same as forcing and directing certain acts.



*eyes up* certain acts.....hummm....anything in particular?


_____________________________

My eyes have been opened....there is nothing on this earth as sexy as a Woman wearing a strapon cock and smile as She looks at me

(in reply to SeductiveLady)
Profile   Post #: 17
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