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lovewithoutfear -> RE: Bottoming from the top. (3/10/2008 1:51:58 AM)
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daddysprop, I disagree with the generalization about the "truly dominant nature." I don't think such a generalization is valuable. In addition, you referred to "most" not regarding people who switch roles in a good light. This is counter to my experience. I would say that for you personally, and for those people you socialize with, your submission expresses in you in a desire to never top, and the dominant's dominance manifests in him as a desire to never bottom. But I would not generalize further than that.
By contrast, the crowds I have run with, in several different parts of the US, seem to favor a "whatever floats people's boat in their relationship" mentality. I personally see doms who are secure enough to bottom on occasion if they feel like it as *more* confident in their dominance, not less. It also comes across to me as their being more willing to learn by experience. Same holds for my opinion of subs/slaves who are willing to top. It is freeing, and to me this lifestyle is about being free.
I realize this thread is more about tops or doms who don't seem confident, who ask many questions/much guidance of their bottoms and subs. I would say there are ways to get the information needed and still exude that domly air of confidence. One of the best ways to disarm me and make things delicious for me is for a dom to be decisive and sure most of the time, yet man/woman enough to admit if they were wrong and ask/respect my opinion on what would work better for me. That builds trust, and for me fosters the desire to submit and to build that dom up whatever way I can with obedience and service.
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daddysprop247 wrote:
"in the opinion of some (myself and my Master being among them), one who has a truly Dominant nature would have no desire to ever bottom, just as one who has a submissive nature would have no desire to ever top."
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