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Odds of success on a BDSM dating site... - 3/6/2008 8:21:52 PM   
StuckInSC


Posts: 4
Joined: 3/2/2007
Status: offline 		This is posted from our journal.  I was wondering how it stacked up to the experiences of others...

I thought some people might find this interesting.  Just out of curiosity I looked back over our past six months of sent and recieved mail and tallied up some statistics.
 
Before I report this, I do want to say that I've had remarkable luck with sites like this.  I've met in real life nearly a dozzen people from collarme or similar services, of those I've had four serious relationships that have lasted at least a year, one of which is my wife April.  I can say with some expertise that this is a fair estimate derived from real numbers, but if anyone wants to check my math or methodology I'll go through the whole formula.
 
Over the past six months we've recieved one response for every seven e-mails we've sent out.
 
Of those responses, one in every three started a continuing electronic dialog either through e-mail or chat.
 
Of those, only one in eight led to a phone call.
 
Of all the phone conversations I've started on the internet, 2 in every 3 lead to a real life encounter.
 
Of all the real life encounters I've had, only half have turned into long term relationships.
 
Of those relationships, I've only met one person that has lasted with me through it all.
 
That means that to find April I had to have four serious relationships, meet eight different women, make twelve girls feel comfortable enough to talk to me on the phone, carry on internet conversations with somewhere around ninety-six people, and send out about six hundred and seventy-two e-mails.
 
So for all you Doms out there, your odds of finding miss right...  1 in 672.

< Message edited by StuckInSC -- 3/6/2008 8:32:51 PM >
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RE: Odds of success on a BDSM dating site... - 3/6/2008 8:24:55 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		*eyes glaze at the math stuff*

But congrats to you and April!  :)


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RE: Odds of success on a BDSM dating site... - 3/6/2008 10:15:34 PM   
petdave


Posts: 2479
Status: offline 		Damn. So you were sending out an average of 26 emails a week? That's a lot.

If it's any consolation, according to my calculations here:
http://www.collarchat.com/m_1607466/mpage_1/key_numbers/tm.htm#1607466
there are only 1472 Dominant Women in the U.S. who are looking for submissive men, and 5,888 men chasing them down, so if you were a single submissive male you'd have a 1 in 4 chance of dying alone, on top of your one in 672 chance of finding love...

So, smile, things can always get worse!

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RE: Odds of success on a BDSM dating site... - 3/6/2008 10:31:17 PM   
faerytattoodgirl


Posts: 5824
Status: offline 		you send out 26 emails a week?  i might receive that many in 10 years...in other words i never get email....must be because im gay ...want to be loved....and am too damn hot looking... damn the luck!

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RE: Odds of success on a BDSM dating site... - 3/6/2008 10:38:04 PM   
StuckInSC


Posts: 4
Joined: 3/2/2007
Status: offline 		Actually I used the figures for the past six months only to determine the ratio of e-mails to responses, responses to electronic conversations, and electronic conversations to telephone conversations.  The ratios following those(namely phone calls to meetings, meetings to relationships, and relationships to true love) had to be taken over a much larger period.  In all I've been using sites like collarme for about seven years, so I suppose I have an average of around two e-mails a week.

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RE: Odds of success on a BDSM dating site... - 3/6/2008 10:43:41 PM   
PanthersMom


Posts: 2215
Joined: 11/26/2007
From: Cleveland Ohio
Status: offline 		26 emails in a week isn't that bad, not really, considering how many emails a person might send out on other sites.  i belong to a ladies' message board in my area and we send that many out on a slow day, i'd almost be afraid to try to count how many we send out in a week.  guess it all depends on your perspective. 
PM

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RE: Odds of success on a BDSM dating site... - 3/6/2008 10:55:26 PM   
StuckInSC


Posts: 4
Joined: 3/2/2007
Status: offline 		The number of e-mails per week is something of a useless statistical figure in this case because there's a lot of fluxuation in when e-mails are sent.  They go out in bursts depending on what's going on in the senders life and how many new and interesting profiles there are to send e-mails to on a site.  Over the seven years I've been using these services, there have been a few gaps several months long where I didn't send out a single e-mail because I was either in a relationship with someone who wasn't interested in poly or I couldn't find any new people with whom I wanted to talk.

It might be more useful to average out the number of e-mails sent in a year.  That would be a much more accurate statistic.

Of course, one could also use this data to determine how many e-mails he'd have to send in the course of a week to find his true love in a certain lenght of time...  for example, if you wanted to find your true love in a year, you'd need to send an average of 13 (12.9 actually) emails a week.

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RE: Odds of success on a BDSM dating site... - 3/6/2008 11:16:09 PM   
petdave


Posts: 2479
Status: offline 		 Yeah, your intitial post is confusing... now that i look at the math, it actually implies that in six months you've gone

1/7 emails>  responses
1/3 email responses> conversations
1/8 conversations> phone
2/3 phone> F2F
1/2 F2F> LTR
1/4LTR> 6MR

so one 6MR = 2016 e-mails in 6 months, or 5.6 emails/day. i'm not sure where your formulae diverged to get 672, but somewhere along the line you've gotten phone conversations and continuing e-mail dialogues mixed up.

Just out of curiosity, what was the size of your initial candidate pool as a Dominant Male, as the compatible-partner ratio is the only number that i've really tried to study from my end?

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RE: Odds of success on a BDSM dating site... - 3/7/2008 12:34:52 AM   
probablyknowme


Posts: 1875
Joined: 9/19/2007
Status: offline 		*glassy eyed stare*

kat
(going back to play with my crayons now)

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RE: Odds of success on a BDSM dating site... - 3/7/2008 3:39:34 AM   
colouredin


Posts: 4279
Joined: 2/2/2007
Status: offline 		*boggles at the maths*
*boggles at the time it must have taken to work it out*

In a year ive sent some messages and got some messages and met some people and spoke to some people and played with some people and got into a relationship with some people :D sorted


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RE: Odds of success on a BDSM dating site... - 3/7/2008 3:42:54 AM   
newdmsextoy


Posts: 13
Joined: 4/25/2004
Status: offline 		On finding someone to meet from the internet:

"The odds are good, but the goods are odd"

:)

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RE: Odds of success on a BDSM dating site... - 3/7/2008 4:53:21 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		it's Friday, people - there's NO math on Fridays!!



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RE: Odds of success on a BDSM dating site... - 3/7/2008 5:16:23 AM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sambamanslilgirl

it's Friday, people - there's NO math on Fridays!!




Heh heh heh.  Agreed. 

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RE: Odds of success on a BDSM dating site... - 3/7/2008 5:21:43 AM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		*blinks*
I dunno , my numbers are FAR easier than than.
I have been in 6 relationships with people from CM.
I have met maybe a dozen people strictly platonically.
I have met about the same dozen who were disasterous mismatches and we knew fairly quickly.
So, Id say im about 50/50 in my good to bad meets, and since I found both my boys on here, I still say its 100% successful.
But, thats just me. I'm chipper, I am vacationing.
DV


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RE: Odds of success on a BDSM dating site... - 3/7/2008 6:13:07 AM   
petdave


Posts: 2479
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sambamanslilgirl

it's Friday, people - there's NO math on Fridays!!


Numbers never go on holiday! Math is all around us, each and every day

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Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Odds of success on a BDSM dating site... - 3/7/2008 6:15:14 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		ugh, you're a sadist!

NO MATH FRIDAYS!!

NO MATH FRIDAYS!!

NO MATH FRIDAYS!!  


_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

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RE: Odds of success on a BDSM dating site... - 3/7/2008 6:17:57 AM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		The bottom line here is you found your Ms. Right...it takes us all different time lengths.  It took me 5 years to find my Mr. Right.

So whatever we went through it was well worth it.


(in reply to StuckInSC)
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RE: Odds of success on a BDSM dating site... - 3/7/2008 6:27:25 AM   
Madame4a


Posts: 2045
Joined: 2/4/2008
From: Washington, DC area
Status: offline 		between the math to figure it out and the odds...

I'm so glad I'm not looking for Mr or Ms Right...

(in reply to StuckInSC)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Odds of success on a BDSM dating site... - 3/7/2008 7:32:22 AM   
StuckInSC


Posts: 4
Joined: 3/2/2007
Status: offline 		Your right.  I just checked it again.  I missed a step.  :(  Good thing it wasn't a math test.  The odds are 1 in 2016.  As I stated earlier though, the data collected over the last six months was only used to derive the first three ratios in the equasion.  The final three ratios needed to be collected from a much longer sample period.  In all, I've been using sites like this for roughly seven years...  I met April two years ago...  And I've had long term relationships with girls not interested in polly for three of those, so really those 2016 e-mails need to be spread over a two year period.  (7-2-3=2)  That comes to an average of 19.3 e-mails a week when actively searching, or 2.8 e-mails a day...  which sounds about right.

< Message edited by StuckInSC -- 3/7/2008 7:37:00 AM >

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RE: Odds of success on a BDSM dating site... - 3/7/2008 1:36:11 PM   
Lumus


Posts: 5968
Joined: 9/16/2007
Status: offline 		I already had my girl before I ever created an account here.  However, the response ratio got me thinking, so I examined my own.

As of now my profile has been active for 142 days.  In that time [not counting mail from Moderators]:

- I've sent 210 mails, of which 206 were read [98%], so I send an average of about 1.5 mails a day [1.47 if you like to be technical].

- I've received 200 and replied to 154 [77%].  That's mainly because in an ongoing mail conversation, there may be no reason to reply, and it can be polite to let the other person have the last word.

- 33 of the 39 people I've talked with in mail have replied at least once [84.6%]; 9 of those 33 people have since communicated with me in forums or methods other than CM [27%]...all 9 online, 5 of the 9 by telephone/VOIP [or about 55.6%]

As per my profile, I'm primarily interested in making friends here at CM.  Since 9 of the 39 people, or about 23%, that I mailed are now friends, I'd say CM is a fairly friendly place.







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