RE: DEAR CALI (Full Version)

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MontrealPhoenix -> RE: DEAR CALI (4/1/2008 9:21:15 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

quote:

ORIGINAL: MontrealPhoenix
I deeply crave giving a man a blowjob. Problem is, i've just had surgery and i'm not allowed to go on my knees. I'm also here alone at home so there aren't exactly a lot of men around. What should i do?


Dear MP:

Open the front curtains and unlock the door.  Lay on your back on the couch, naked, mouth open. I'm sure the answer will come to you.

Cali

Oh thank you, Cali, i will do as you suggest. You are a very wise woman indeed...



subtee -> RE: DEAR CALI (4/1/2008 9:54:00 AM)

~FR

Dear Cali;

I nearly peed myself over something you wrote on the "neck" thread. I can't go without reading your posts...any suggestions on avoiding this in the future?

signed,

Dryfornow



CalifChick -> RE: DEAR CALI (4/1/2008 10:03:15 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subtee
I nearly peed myself over something you wrote on the "neck" thread. I can't go without reading your posts...any suggestions on avoiding this in the future?


Dear ConsideringDepends:

Subtlety is truly an art form, and I'm not sure too many people got that one. Thank you for the compliment (that was a compliment, right?).  For the future, if you're giving a blow job you cannot exactly read my posts, now can you?  Get on it girl.

Cali



faerytattoodgirl -> RE: DEAR CALI (4/1/2008 10:39:58 AM)

dear cali...will you be locking your doors when i am in cali with Domahpet? in the summer?



CalifChick -> RE: DEAR CALI (4/1/2008 10:42:17 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: faerytattoodgirl
dear cali...will you be locking your doors when i am in cali with Domahpet? in the summer?


Being that domah is a couple hundred miles from me... I must ask... should I worry about this?

Cali



faerytattoodgirl -> RE: DEAR CALI (4/1/2008 10:46:17 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

quote:

ORIGINAL: faerytattoodgirl
dear cali...will you be locking your doors when i am in cali with Domahpet? in the summer?


Being that domah is a couple hundred miles from me... I must ask... should I worry about this?

Cali



thats only 2 hours drive...so YES.



CalifChick -> RE: DEAR CALI (4/1/2008 10:47:29 AM)

More like four hours without traffic.  I have time to run.

Cali



cjan -> RE: DEAR CALI (4/1/2008 6:10:56 PM)

Dear Cali,

All the ladies I've met lately seem to be totally obsessed with sucking cock.  And while I enjoy a good skull fuck as much as the next guy, I just wanna know.Doesn't anybody wanna fuck anymore ?

Thanks,
NoMud4My Turtle





CalifChick -> RE: DEAR CALI (4/1/2008 7:58:54 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: cjan
All the ladies I've met lately seem to be totally obsessed with sucking cock.  And while I enjoy a good skull fuck as much as the next guy, I just wanna know.Doesn't anybody wanna fuck anymore ?


So what's the problem? Are you a one-hit wonder? Who's the Dom here?  Man up Dude and take control of the situation.  Sheesh.

Cali



cjan -> RE: DEAR CALI (4/2/2008 5:54:23 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

quote:

ORIGINAL: cjan
All the ladies I've met lately seem to be totally obsessed with sucking cock.  And while I enjoy a good skull fuck as much as the next guy, I just wanna know.Doesn't anybody wanna fuck anymore ?


So what's the problem? Are you a one-hit wonder? Who's the Dom here?  Man up Dude and take control of the situation.  Sheesh.

Cali



Right. Must be the pesky wishy-washy Switch in me. Damn. *downs a can of spinach and throws the switch* AAAAAARRRRGGGHHHHH. That's mo bettah. Now, spread bitches !

Tankies Oh Wise One



domahpet -> RE: DEAR CALI (4/2/2008 6:53:28 AM)

(giggles at cjan ;) )

Dear Cali,
im going to canada this summer,
whats the best way to blend in and
be less noticable?
~hiding in plain sight



CalifChick -> RE: DEAR CALI (4/2/2008 9:04:58 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: domahpet
im going to canada this summer, whats the best way to blend in and be less noticable?


Well first, no hanging out with faery.  People will think she's Cate Blanchett, and you'll have no end of papparazzi following you.  Second, you have to wear clothes.  I know, I know, that's quite a stretch for you, but you simply must do it.  Third, and I know this one will be the MOST difficult for you... but seriously, stop yelling at every man on the street, "Wanna Fuck?".  Now don't get me wrong, a quiet offer of a blowjob is okay. But no yelling.

Cali



subtee -> RE: DEAR CALI (4/2/2008 9:56:38 AM)

Dear Cali;

I noticed that you took the survey I posted called "Survey Says!" in the "Polls and Other Random Stupidity" here on CM. Did you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed reading your answers? And would you recommnend others to go take it ("Survey Says!" in the "Polls and Other Random Stupidity" threads)...after, of course they give/receive a blow job?

Pandy McPanderson



CalifChick -> RE: DEAR CALI (4/2/2008 10:36:23 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subtee
I noticed that you took the survey I posted called "Survey Says!" in the "Polls and Other Random Stupidity" here on CM. Did you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed reading your answers? And would you recommnend others to go take it ("Survey Says!" in the "Polls and Other Random Stupidity" threads)...after, of course they give/receive a blow job?


Dear ObviousGirl:

Yes, blowjobs first, surveys second.  By the way, did you mean to ask about the best book you've NEVER read?  I'm thinking you meant "ever". [:D] 

Cali
(and my crushee can take his hot self on over there and answer it too)
(wondering how many peeps will respond to THAT)



subtee -> RE: DEAR CALI (4/2/2008 12:08:10 PM)

I did mean never read...as in you know it's great literature but you haven't gotten around to it.

I think you and I are the only sudokuers. I'm addicted. [8|]

So....has your crushee posted yet???



CalifChick -> RE: DEAR CALI (4/2/2008 12:19:43 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subtee
So....has your crushee posted yet???


Sigh... no... he knows I pine for him.

Cali



subtee -> RE: DEAR CALI (4/2/2008 12:20:27 PM)

Just whisper in my ear who it is and I'll go tell him

[Edited to add I'll go tell him to take the survey called "Survey Says!"  posted under "Polls and Other Random Stupidity"...]



CalifChick -> RE: DEAR CALI (4/2/2008 12:36:57 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subtee

Just whisper in my ear who it is and I'll go tell him


(Psst pstxh bwqa psst) and then (Psst pstxh bwqa psst) and I really like it when (Psst pstxh bwqa psst) and oh god if only (Psst pstxh bwqa psst) all over (Psst pstxh bwqa psst)) coconut cream pie and (Psst pstxh bwqa psst) both feet and (Psst pstxh bwqa psst) Holy Mother of God (Psst pstxh bwqa psst) in a heartbeat, forever.

Cali



Lumus -> RE: DEAR CALI (4/2/2008 1:51:10 PM)

Dear Cali,

Two questions.

First:  if I'm in Toronto this summer and hear someone across the street yell, "Wanna fuck?"...want me to go over and say hi to domahpet for ya?

Second:  Is there a faster way to make a woman stop going on about her undying love for me than cramming my cock into her throat?  [Not that I mind your professions of undying love...]




CalifChick -> RE: DEAR CALI (4/2/2008 2:15:32 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lumus

First:  if I'm in Toronto this summer and hear someone across the street yell, "Wanna fuck?"...want me to go over and say hi to domahpet for ya?

Second:  Is there a faster way to make a woman stop going on about her undying love for me than cramming my cock into her throat?  [Not that I mind your professions of undying love...]


The answer to the first question is "yes".  The answer to the second question is "bwa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa."  Ahem.  Okay.  Sorry to burst your little bubble Lumus darling, but you're not my secret crush. 

Cali



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