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Disabilities and the internet. - 3/12/2008 9:33:14 AM   
Aneirin


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In our day to day living, we come across people who are disabled. Usually the most obvious to us are those that are physically impaired in that they are not as able to live their day to day life with the same ability as more able bodied people. These people are challenged  in mobility.

Now there exists other disabilities, some which are not obvious to an onlooker and even disabilities yet unrecognised by a person in themselves, these people move along in their day to day lives doing the best they can, until something happens and they get a label.

So, the internet, all those who are visibly disabled here on the internet may be viewed if one chooses to view an internet or forum user as perfectly able, unless in an image disability aids are on show, or a person mentions their disability.They are basically the same as everyone else.

But what is also here are those that are impaired in the non physical way, there are people with learning difficulties here, be it dyslexia or whatever.

Now, in our day to day lives we help those who are physically challenged, do we not think that the same should apply to those who are mentally challenged here on the internet, forums etc. If we recognise a disability, is it not better to try and understand and help that person?


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RE: Disabilities and the internet. - 3/12/2008 9:34:38 AM   
faerytattoodgirl


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yes...i need help...please send me $200 so i can buy a sirius sat radio with subsciption.... thanks much!

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RE: Disabilities and the internet. - 3/12/2008 9:37:17 AM   
Stephann


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I would much prefer to be treated as a whole, healthy person in spite of any disability I possess.  I, personally, would feel empowered by working to overcome my disability to be 'on par' with others, than to have others slowing down for me.  This applies to mental as well as physical issues.

Should I stop a moment in the middle of a conversation, and consider "well, this person is dull as a rock, arrogant, insulting, and unpleasent to be around....ohhhhhh wait!  He's probably socially disabled!  I should really work harder to be his friend, and spend more time with him, so he doesnt' feel bad about being a jackass!"

Stephan


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RE: Disabilities and the internet. - 3/12/2008 9:49:54 AM   
Pyrrsefanie


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I usually try to give people the benefit of the doubt and read past typos and word usage errors to see what message they're trying to convey.  If it's a good, thoughtful message, I usually chalk it up to dyslexia or poor typing skills for whatever reason, and respond as I would a grammatically immaculate post.  If it's something to the effect of "lol i lyk dis too wanna fuk" then chances are they're just a moron.

My grandmother is dyslexic and easily falls under the "severely learning impaired" classification that they use in public schools around these parts.  When I was living far away from her she'd write me letters that were sometimes very difficult to read because she'd reverse words or mix up her usages... I always felt like an asshole, though, for laughing at the one where she was trying to give me advice on one of my old relationships and suggested that I not "get so rape up someone."

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RE: Disabilities and the internet. - 3/12/2008 9:51:38 AM   
RCdc


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Aneirin
If we recognise a disability, is it not better to try and understand and help that person?



Get outta my head A!
Better to try and understand?  Absolutely.  But it's easier to be lazy and to ridicule - or even worse - go sheep!
 
On a serious note, I suffered at school from both teachers and pupils, not because I was dyslexic, but because people thought I was crazy - seeing colours when there were none and what sane person can taste things when they aren't eating?  People don't tend to think of synaesthesia as a disability, but when you haven't been diagnosed and your 11 and pointing out that a teachers name smells like earth, it's not gonna go down so well.  I don't think you have to be best freinds and help a person out when they have a 'hidden' disability, just don;t go entirely the other way.
 
the.dark.

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RE: Disabilities and the internet. - 3/12/2008 10:12:40 AM   
popeye1250


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quote:

ORIGINAL: faerytattoodgirl

yes...i need help...please send me $200 so i can buy a sirius sat radio with subsciption.... thanks much!


Faery, $200 for a radio?
That's not very ambitious now is it?

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RE: Disabilities and the internet. - 3/12/2008 10:35:19 AM   
Bound2One


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You know what has made me more sympathetic to those with disorders that aren't obvious at first glance?  Watching the kids my oldest has gone to school with for the past 9 years and seeing some of the challenges they have faced due to various disabilities.  Whether it's a learning disability, one which prevents them from processing information correctly, one that makes tags on clothing absolutely unbearable to them - whatever.  Watching them go through their struggles (at times, they're not always struggling) and seeing their families coping with whatever challenges they have to deal with - that's made me more open.  It's been wonderful seeing most of these kids conquer their challenges and become great teens - it's heartbreaking to know that a friend's child has taken 2 steps back at times ...

Too many people will look at a kid and say that they are just ill-behaved or stupid or just won't do the work they need to, or are weird.  That really bugs me, and it's important to me to carry that thought through to my interactions with adults.  It's tough sometimes b/c when reading posts where every other word is spelled wrong or the grammar is horrific - I'm a grammar geek and it bugs me.  lol  But those kids who have learning disabilities grow up, and are now adults and communicating the best they know how.

Now how much of bad spelling and grammar is attributable to learning disorders and how much is due to sheer laziness?  lol  Obviously I can't make that call w/o knowing the poster and try to err on the side of caution. 

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RE: Disabilities and the internet. - 3/12/2008 10:45:31 AM   
Jeffff


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 I am here mostly, for amusement, my own..:)
I don't feel any obligation to be extra understanding of anything here. the price of admission is a working internet connection. Anyone cam claim to be anything here.
Having said that, there are some folks here I have come to enjoy quite a  bit. I like it here and if I felt someone actually needed help, I would not automatically reject the notion

Jeff

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RE: Disabilities and the internet. - 3/12/2008 11:08:11 AM   
Rule


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Aneirin
If we recognise a disability, is it not better to try and understand and help that person?

Sometimes yes, sometimes no.
 
I always read the posts of someone on CM who was severely dyslectic, trying to make sense of it. She tried her best to communicate.
 
On the other hand I hide the posts of people who post in illigible or offensive fonts. Those people try their best to make themselves not read.
 
Then there were two doms on here that had a logical disability. They continuously misinterpreted what other people said and consequently were in unwarranted continuous conflict in any discussion.
 
The first one I asked whether he was dyslectic as I considered that a less likely cause of his continuous misinterpretations. That innocuous and well intentioned question, having the best interest of said person at heart, caused one of the mods to come down hard on me. (I did not agree with that then and I still disagree with that mod about that issue.) In any case dyslexia was not affirmed, and therefore I had to conclude that my primary assessment of a logical disability was correct. So I hid the posts of that person. It is possible to communicate with a dyslectic; it is not possible to communicate with someone with a logical disability - at least not rationally.
 
The second dom also had some kind of logical disability, but it was my impression that it was of a different kind. Anyway, he was also obnoxious and evil. So I hid his posts for a time, but a couple of months later I undid that when I had recovered from the stress he caused me. Perchance I may hide his posts again at a later time.

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RE: Disabilities and the internet. - 3/12/2008 11:11:46 AM   
Jeffff


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Rule
The second dom also had some kind of logical disability, but it was my impression that it was of a different kind. Anyway, he was also obnoxious and evil. So I hid his posts for a time, but a couple of months later I undid that when I had recovered from the stress he caused me. Perchance I may hide his posts again at a later time.


Geez Rule, all you had to do was  shoot me a c-mail..:)

Jeff

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RE: Disabilities and the internet. - 3/12/2008 11:29:25 AM   
pahunkboy


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....sounds like someone is having a bad day.

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RE: Disabilities and the internet. - 3/12/2008 11:40:18 AM   
SinergyNstrumpet


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quote:

Now, in our day to day lives we help those who are physically challenged, do we not think that the same should apply to those who are mentally challenged here on the internet, forums etc. If we recognise a disability, is it not better to try and understand and help that person?


I think it is important for me to try to understand people, but help them? Not necessarily. That would assume that they need my help, or want it. Just because a person is disabled does not mean they want help... many disabled people don't.

I often am often saddened by the way some people with learning disabilities are treated on the internet... the first assumption is that the person is stupid. I think that people should give others the benefit of the doubt and assume a learning disability before labeling a person ignorant or stupid or lazy.

julia

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RE: Disabilities and the internet. - 3/12/2008 11:44:35 AM   
tigerlilly34


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after my stroke and having my speach taken away and use of my right side have affected i am more empathic with others. when you have basic abilities that we all take forgranted and have to completely start over again you have a whole new appreciaton for others with disabilities go thru everyday.

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RE: Disabilities and the internet. - 3/12/2008 12:50:49 PM   
CuriousLord


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Aneirin

[...][ooc]to those who are mentally challenged here on the internet, forums etc. If we recognise a disability, is it not better to try and understand and help that person?


Try to every day.  The problem with helping intellectual disabilities is that such individuals do not realize their handicap.  Further, such individuals may be only realatively disabled, but not disabled with regard to the general population

I mean, seriously, say one is a gifted person (about 130 IQ- well above average).  This one still sounds retarded to a genius.  But, if this one were to talk to a genius, he'd only think that they were smarter- not that they can't even see this one as intelligent to begin with.

So anyone with an above-average IQ thinks that what they think and say is necessarily valid to some extent in many cases.  And, if some hypoethetical genius were to come along, they'd recognize his thoughts and opinions as skew; he wouldn't always make sense.  They'd still be able to talk to him on equal if not superior ground because they, of course, should be able to understand what anyone says, just because they can understand what most say.

And this, my friends, is my rant of the day, which I'm sure no one will find applicable to their lives despite how much sense it may make, all for the very same damn reasons just stated.

---

Slightly more on topic, yeah, I try to help out people with deficiencies.  They're so rarely appreciative, because accepting help is to accept that help was needed, and no one wants to be "dumb".

Plus then there's the fact that people are quite attached to their thoughts and beliefs.  To accept that they're wrong about them all is a scary, and indeed nearly incomprehesible, thing to be able to realize.  Who could accept so much of what they know and believe to be overturned?

So the best way that I can see to help most people is slowly.  Talking to them and slowly giving them the tools to change their world.

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RE: Disabilities and the internet. - 3/12/2008 1:17:02 PM   
pahunkboy


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From: Central Pennsylvania
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Aneirin

In our day to day living, we come across people who are disabled. Usually the most obvious to us are those that are physically impaired in that they are not as able to live their day to day life with the same ability as more able bodied people. These people are challenged  in mobility.

Now there exists other disabilities, some which are not obvious to an onlooker and even disabilities yet unrecognised by a person in themselves, these people move along in their day to day lives doing the best they can, until something happens and they get a label.

So, the internet, all those who are visibly disabled here on the internet may be viewed if one chooses to view an internet or forum user as perfectly able, unless in an image disability aids are on show, or a person mentions their disability.They are basically the same as everyone else.

But what is also here are those that are impaired in the non physical way, there are people with learning difficulties here, be it dyslexia or whatever.

Now, in our day to day lives we help those who are physically challenged, do we not think that the same should apply to those who are mentally challenged here on the internet, forums etc. If we recognise a disability, is it not better to try and understand and help that person?



Could you elaborate?

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RE: Disabilities and the internet. - 3/12/2008 1:28:28 PM   
MichiganHeadmast


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What is this "lysdexia" you speak about?

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RE: Disabilities and the internet. - 3/12/2008 1:56:36 PM   
Maya2001


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From: Woodstock ONT,CANADA
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quote:

Now, in our day to day lives we help those who are physically challenged, do we not think that the same should apply to those who are mentally challenged here on the internet, forums etc. If we recognise a disability, is it not better to try and understand and help that person?


People tend to be more helpful to those with  apparent  handicaps that can be visually heard or seen where there is evidence it exists, even many people with non visible "physcial" handicaps get ostracized  and ridiculed , being referred to as fakers and lazy etc.


I don't mind helping someone who is handicapped  regardless of form ......but I may do so a couple of times and discontinue if I see they are making no efforts to help themselves, otherwise I only become an enabler and the person will find no motivation to help themself in finding ways around the obstacles life puts in front of them and they start becoming more dependant on others, and when I do offer help it is more often in the form of motivation to find ways of helping themselves,   I have found myself at times handicapped  for periods of time,  being a sole support parent I found was one very powerful motivator especially at the time when my child was a toddler and my nervous system collapsed and I found myself with multiple sclerosis type symptom and unable to walk more than a few steps and collapsing for about 5 months,  last thing I wanted was my child in foster care till I recovered so I found ways to manage  even if is meant crawling around on the floor to get from point A to point B, only asking for help on a couple of ocassions inorder to get groceries, even when I went thru major surgeries, for example my son was 3 when had abdominal surgery for cancer, I need help while I was hospitalized but 5 days later when released I resumed his care again and ran my home, because I did not have help I had to learn how to manage, I have seen others go thru similiar and need others  to do everything for them for the next month and longer even because the help was there and thiee helpers enabled them not to try to do things for themselves, causing the individual to take a lot longer to recover. So there are pitfalls in offering too much help and in what form the help is offered.   Other than in the case of severe mental retardation most handicaps are like roadblocks  one can either just sit there at the roadblock and do nothing waiting for someone to come to your aid or you can backup and turn around and find an alternate way around the road block even though the roads you may have to take will be filled with potholes, so you may not get around in perfect shape but you have made it around for example the stroke victim who at first was unable to talk but took the bumpy road going thru therapy to learn to talk again , it may not be as they were before but at least can be understood

Understanding what you are referring to .... this is more an issue of tolerance, acceptance and having empathy rather than about  helping







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RE: Disabilities and the internet. - 3/12/2008 4:03:40 PM   
pahunkboy


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One thing I learned is that no matter how much one may think they know the pain, the limits of day to day functioning; one cant know.       disabling  pain is not the same type of pain as prior pain.

secondly- no matter how bad i ever had it- i dont have to look far to see people worse off.

during the batch of years where functioning was hard- i never thought it would get better.  [but] it did.    the larger society isnt too interested in others suffering- at times- why would i want to be the "entertainment"- ie Nancy Grace, on CNN.  these OMG it is awful shows- they way they evolved are turning a bad situation into a circus.   anyhow- i hope i dont loose control so much that im part of the circus- and   i dont think i want to be an observer/sponser of the "show" either.

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RE: Disabilities and the internet. - 3/12/2008 5:51:40 PM   
Rayne58


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*fast reply*
Sir has physical disabilities (renal failure, diabetes) but He is also dyslexic.  I am a qualified teacher aide and have worked with kids who have learning problems, so when we got together in r/l I worked it out.  NO ONE had picked up on this in the past, His school life was hell because no matter how hard He tried He just could not read and write well enough to keep up.

When we started posting together online, His posts were misspelled but the quirky sense of humour just shone through.  LOL I took to following Him around the boards just to read what He'd written!   

Now I serve as His spellchecker and post editor so things He writes are more understandable...I have standing orders to point out if anything He's written needs editing

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RE: Disabilities and the internet. - 3/12/2008 6:03:53 PM   
orfunboi


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quote:

ORIGINAL: popeye1250

quote:

ORIGINAL: faerytattoodgirl

yes...i need help...please send me $200 so i can buy a sirius sat radio with subsciption.... thanks much!


Faery, $200 for a radio?
That's not very ambitious now is it?


Maybe she meant 200 a month....

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