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Training Task Input for a Military Dom - 3/12/2008 7:26:58 PM   
warrior50


Posts: 9
Joined: 3/12/2008
Status: offline 		Hello submissives,

I am relatively new to this world...and have come to all of you in search of understanding and ways to become a better Dom for my sub.
  I chose this name of "Warrior" because I am a military officer.  I have always had a very dominant personality, a leader, definitely a Type A type of man.  I have commanded soldiers in combat situations and some traits that have always come naturally to me as a military leader carry over to my newfound calling as a Dominant.
This has not been a decision on my part...that one day I all of a sudden awoke and decided that I want to become Dominant.  No, it was much more of an "awakening."  Approximately 9 months ago I met the most amazing woman I have ever met online.  She flat out told me that she was submissive in nature, but never really had brought her submissive instincts to life because she had never found the right type of man.  She is strong, independent, a woman with both character and grace.  I fell so very genuinely and passionately in love with her...she COMPLETES ME.
Through her, not by her pushing but just through the joy of loving her, I discovered many dark rooms in my head that the "old me" would have found sick and twisted...repulsive.  But the new me has discovered that BDSM is a world of beauty.  It is about love and affection, training and accountability.  It is about me protecting her and making her stronger by helping her to overcome her inhibitions and weaknesses through my strength.  It is about her deriving her pleasure from serving me...and me alone...forever. 
  This entire process has been an "awakening" for me.  A realization...not that I am someone new, but rather a realization of what has been buried deep within me all along, hidden by the norms that society has ingrained in me.  I have chosen to shed this small way of thinking, and to fully embrace the lifestyle that has called me.
  I am "embracing" being a Dominant...and I truly love my sub.  I would die for her.
  So why do I come here?   For two reasons:
1.  I want to learn more about what other men have written...to help me better understand my need and desire to correctly Dominate my sub.

2.  This is where you come in, my new friends.  My sub and I live on opposite ends of the country.  We see each other very rarely, every couple months or so.  When we come together we fully live out the lifestyle that both of us have chosen.  The vast majority of the time, however, we communicate through email, chat, and phone.  This makes things difficult sometimes, presenting unique challenges.
  I seek to train my sub...and to train her well.  She is in need of tasks to execute, ones that require self-discipline and attention to detail.  What I am currently seeking are ideas for tasks to help train her that she can execute on her side of the glass. She is a business professional; while I have given her highly-sexual tasks involving bondage that she performs in the privacy of her home, she is in need of tasks that I can have her execute at work and in public without causing undo notice.
  I have another reason for asking for your insights on how to continue our Dom/sub relationship online.  I will be deploying to Iraq in a few months, most likely Baghdad.  I will be able to email her regularly, but phone and personal contact are definitely out of the question.
  I seek your ideas, and your advice, on how to better train my sub.  I look forward to gaining your insights and wisdom.  I am seeking ideas you might have on effective training measures for her.  While I am quite creative, I am in search of tasks to have her perform, both in public and in the privacy of her office.
  I look forward to your input.

-Warrior
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Training Task Input for a Military Dom - 3/12/2008 7:35:25 PM   
chamberqueen


Posts: 1597
Joined: 10/25/2007
From: Kalamazoo, MI
Status: offline 		I was in a lengthy relationship with someone in the Army, and know how hard it can be on the woman at home.  Having daily tasks will keep her connection to you and help her not to worry as much.

Some can be simple, such as not wearing panties to work.  Some of the office tasks I was given included going to the restroom and putting paper clips on my nipples (something easily hidden under a bra), wearing a skirt or dress each day (to look more beautiful for my Dom though he could not see me), using pens with a certain color of ink, working a given phrase into a conversation at least three times a day, and other things that were pretty simple but kept me thinking of him.  I could still be totally professional yet I was constantly reminded of my belonging.

One more difficult task was that every time I had a cigarette I had to slightly insert the filter into my pussy before I was allowed to smoke it.  (Of course, this only works if she smokes.)  I wore a strand of pearls for a makeshift collar.  There are many creative things that you can come up with as standing rules, then throw in a few new ones when you get the chance to email.  Of course, home time is anything goes time.

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RE: Training Task Input for a Military Dom - 3/12/2008 7:38:01 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		What exactly is your end goal?  What behaviors/skill sets and what frames of mind do you want her to easily access?  Which situations do you want her behavior to be changed, how do you want it to be changed, and why do you want them to change?

Without knowing that, it's impossible to offer any MEANINGFUL suggestions on how training would be more effective.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

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RE: Training Task Input for a Military Dom - 3/12/2008 7:41:39 PM   
kyraofMists


Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		The tasks will really depend on what you what training you are wanting to impart.

I have significant experience with a long distance relationship; he and I were over 3,000 miles apart in seperate countries for over two years (we now live together).  Much of our focus was on building security within our relationship and learning about each other. 

Knight's Kyra

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"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

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RE: Training Task Input for a Military Dom - 3/12/2008 8:45:07 PM   
warrior50


Posts: 9
Joined: 3/12/2008
Status: offline 		Thanks for replying.  Much appreciated.

I want to do several things with her tasks. 
- She has openly asked for help in improving her awareness, self-discipline, and attention to detail. 
- She very much likes fucking herself with various objects (suggestions?)
- I want her tasks to remind her that I am ALWAYS with her.  This is especially important since we are so far away.  My deployment to Iraq will be very tough on both of us.

Thank you.

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RE: Training Task Input for a Military Dom - 3/12/2008 8:49:55 PM   
warrior50


Posts: 9
Joined: 3/12/2008
Status: offline 		She has told me that part of what she likes about me being a military officer is that I hold her accountable for her actions.  She freely admits that she wants me to help her become more disciplined and self-controlled.  To pay closer attention to detail.  I also want her to get out of it that I am always with her, especially when I am deployed.  I have had her do simple tasks like wearing a rubber band around her wrist all day, tight enough for her to constantly know that it is there without being too painful.  I have had her drink apple juice at exactly 48 minutes past the hour, wordlessly mouthing, "I feel you your strong hand upon my shoulder, Sir."

She is an exceptionally gifted writer.  Writing tasks are very good for her, as they cause her to think and they give me valuable insight into her that it is difficult to do without physically being there to read her body language and reactions.

Thoughts on various writing tasks?

Thank you.l

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RE: Training Task Input for a Military Dom - 3/12/2008 8:55:36 PM   
warrior50


Posts: 9
Joined: 3/12/2008
Status: offline 		One more thing I forgot to mention.  She is an EXCEPTIONALLY gifted writer.  Essay tasks are very good for both of us, as it causes her to examine things more closely, most significantly herself, and it gives me valuable insight into her, especially important since I am not there to read her moods, her body language, etc.

Thoughts or suggestions on writing tasks?

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RE: Training Task Input for a Military Dom - 3/12/2008 9:11:01 PM   
chamberqueen


Posts: 1597
Joined: 10/25/2007
From: Kalamazoo, MI
Status: offline 		My writing tasks were to keep a diary of sorts and email it nightly.  This was to include my general feelings on submission, definitely about any masturbation (which was assigned to me), and any other thoughts I wished to put in.

Having been engaged to a soldier I knew that it would only make him feel badly to tell him how much I wanted him to be with me - after all, he would be if he could.  This type of exercise, or writing fantasies that I believed could come true, was a huge help.  If you choose to have her write her fantasies it will also give you more insight into additional tasks and what the two of you can joyfully do together once you come home.  (By the way, my prayers are with you.)

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RE: Training Task Input for a Military Dom - 3/12/2008 9:14:05 PM   
Gemini1766


Posts: 991
Joined: 3/7/2008
Status: offline 		I'm new too, Warrior. I was a SGT when I was in. Loved the military and was sad that I had to leave it, but a bad back doesn't go well with military service. I look forward to more answers here. I like what I've seen so far.

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RE: Training Task Input for a Military Dom - 3/13/2008 2:01:15 AM   
tigerseye


Posts: 79
Joined: 1/10/2008
Status: offline 		my Master is in the military, and will soon be sent down to Alabama while i remain in NYC, so i completely understand the distance.  one thing he has me do is he gives me writting assignments to think about, then gives me a date to send it to him by. 

one way he helps me with my discipline is he has given me a set of exercises he wants me to do daily.  not only does it keep me in shape, but it's a way to do something for him while he isn't around.

i will certainly ask him what he thinks when it's a half-way decent hour ^_~


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~rose~


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RE: Training Task Input for a Military Dom - 3/13/2008 5:09:15 AM   
Bound2One


Posts: 614
Joined: 1/11/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: warrior50

One more thing I forgot to mention.  She is an EXCEPTIONALLY gifted writer.  Essay tasks are very good for both of us, as it causes her to examine things more closely, most significantly herself, and it gives me valuable insight into her, especially important since I am not there to read her moods, her body language, etc.

Thoughts or suggestions on writing tasks?


You could create a blog together and have her write daily or every other day on either specific topics you assign, or on an article you both might find interesting, on her feelings, on her desires and fantasies.  www.blogger.com makes it very easy to create a place where you both can post and maintain your thoughts of one another.  Another plus for the blog is that it's lovely to go in and scroll through the months of writings for a warm fuzzy feeling for those times you're missing one another. 

Good luck to you both. 

(in reply to warrior50)
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RE: Training Task Input for a Military Dom - 3/14/2008 8:30:00 AM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline 		Writing: keep a journal, perhaps on a daily basis, with 2 relationship focused entires a week and 2 self awareness entried a week.

Development: Ask her "Why do you feel this way?" about everything, positive or negative.

Ritual: Have her kneel and center each night before going to bed. If neither of you know what centering means, look it up. I suggest both practice it. The ritual will focus her mind on you, you and her and her.

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
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Ms Relationship Books
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BDSM How-To Books

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RE: Training Task Input for a Military Dom - 3/14/2008 9:55:53 AM   
Archer


Posts: 3207
Joined: 3/11/2005
Status: offline 		You may find value in listing out the values you hold as a Dominant and the values she holds as a submissive.
Those values will as you already know from military service serve as a foundation.
Set ritual activity to reinforce the values (exactly the idea behind the various rituals of basic training)
Attention to detail exercises are not diffiult to design, simply assign the breakdown of larger tasks into the smallest level.

The idea of an SOP documentation would be a great exercise considering the things you have told us so far.
Uses her writting skill strength to work on th attention to details while creating a manual of how YOU want things done.



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RE: Training Task Input for a Military Dom - 3/14/2008 10:27:13 AM   
Gemini1766


Posts: 991
Joined: 3/7/2008
Status: offline 		What an absolutely fabulous idea, Archer. I think I'll be using that myself.

(in reply to Archer)
Profile   Post #: 14
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