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MissMorrigan -> RE: opinion clash (3/15/2008 1:28:03 AM)
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Hi, RealityLicks,
I think that tends to happen in most social settings and isn't specific to the BDSM scene as such, although I guess b/c the scene is a 'minority' it's more noticeable, if that makes sense. Also, when people discuss something in person, regardless of the topic and people's personal levels of intensity, they can u sually find something to relate to one another without feeling the need to adopt those airs of superiority/condescendence, etc..., with the internet, however, it's right there, in your face, people tend to lose social graces b/c there's no consequences for them doing so (usually).
As for your last comment about listening to the 'voice' that's usually ignored... I discovered this on anohter board, it was a discussion on medical issues and one of the posters was clearly profoundly dyslexic, but also young and using text speak. Rather than listen to what he had to say, people were criticising him for his poor grammar/text speak, ridiculing him and basically doing their damnedest to belittle him, until a contributor in her seventies took them to task and said, "I come into this conversation mid-way, a conversation we can all benefit from, yet rather than discuss an issue that affects us all, you would rather focus on tearing down a young man who is certainly different from yourselves, but not lesser, and if you put your malice to one-side and listened to him you will find someone disaffected, refreshing and interesting, and who has had me, in my seventies, full of admiration for not once has he responded adversely to your comments and he shall go from strength to strength, continuing to learn and embrace life, and you shall remain stinted." That isn't verbatim, but I remember most of what she'd said to the posters on that board.
quote:
ORIGINAL: RealityLicks
I feel this very strongly most times I visit this site. I believe the basis of BDSM is actually egalitarianism. But there are a small handful of people here who's views aren't just unconventional but outright extremist. The majority of posters prefer to overlook this and effect a friendly relationship with them. I find anyone who does this really hard to tolerate and usually skip their posts.
The other side of BDSM, online or realtime, is that people are extra cliquey, which might have to do with the levels of trust and openness involved, I not sure. I've never been able to stomach the scene's tendency to intimidate and ostracize people within it. I force myse;lf to listen to the voice that's been forced out - its normally a lot more interesting than the herd. If I follow, I lose me.
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