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upto wat level do you want us to submit? - 3/16/2008 12:53:13 PM   
searchin4love


Posts: 47
Joined: 3/15/2008
Status: offline 		by level i do not mean the extent to which a sub can endure pain and humilation..
i mean do you want us to completely shut down our thought process?
if my opinions about life,world and the philosophy to which i subscribe do not match with yours then will you ask me to change it to wat you believe..is submission a complete deindividualisation of person on all levels?..do you want us to be just like a dog who speaks english too?

< Message edited by searchin4love -- 3/16/2008 12:55:19 PM >
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RE: upto wat level do you want us to submit? - 3/16/2008 12:58:30 PM   
khem


Posts: 300
Joined: 8/8/2005
Status: offline 		I think most of us do not want someone who doesn't think for themselves... I had thought it goes without saying.

If someone had drastically conflicting world views, I would probably just pass rather than seek to change their view (if it seemed like a huge difference).  Minor differences make for good conversation and debate.  At appropriate times and in a respectful manner, debating with a submissive seems like a fine way to spend an afternoon.

On the other hand, there may be minor behavioral changes I would of course want to make.  It doesn't mean anyone loses their individuality - it's just crafting them to better suit my needs.  I think my attraction is to that individuality - not some notion that I can erase it and replace it with something else.



(in reply to searchin4love)
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RE: upto wat level do you want us to submit? - 3/16/2008 12:58:36 PM   
LadyHathor


Posts: 775
Joined: 1/2/2008
Status: offline 		uhm its W-H-A-T ( not wat)--
 
you generalize far too much---some Dominas do, some don't---I suggest you look for the one who has the same aspirations for a submissive as you do for being a submissive.
 
I already have a dog, and she does not speak english, because if she did, My secrets would be out.
 
smiles.

_____________________________

Lady Hathor, I am the Mistress Hathor of Orleans, I am what I am, often to the dismay and discomfort of others.

(in reply to searchin4love)
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RE: upto wat level do you want us to submit? - 3/16/2008 1:04:14 PM   
Lashra


Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline 		Nope not me. I like strong, intelligent subs/slaves who can voice their own thoughts and opinions. Why would I want someone who is nothing more than a robot? There would be no challenge in that nor any fun.

I wouldn't take on a sub who's needs/wants/desires varied greatly from my own, there would be no point. Neither of us could fulfil the other. He can have differing opinions yes, as long as they are respectfully stated and do not harm our dynamic.

~Lashra


_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”






(in reply to searchin4love)
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RE: upto wat level do you want us to submit? - 3/16/2008 1:05:52 PM   
searchin4love


Posts: 47
Joined: 3/15/2008
Status: offline 		thanks for the info :)
:) i know that its "what" as we are taught UK english in schools.but i sometimes write wat ..just like that..ofcourse not in formal letters and applications :)

yup i have seen some profiles those demanded complete submission while some were not like that...

so are you willing to learn from your sub if he knows more than you about something..

(in reply to LadyHathor)
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RE: upto wat level do you want us to submit? - 3/16/2008 1:10:46 PM   
MistressNoName


Posts: 664
Joined: 10/26/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: searchin4love

by level i do not mean the extent to which a sub can endure pain and humilation..
i mean do you want us to completely shut down our thought process?
if my opinions about life,world and the philosophy to which i subscribe do not match with yours then will you ask me to change it to wat you believe..is submission a complete deindividualisation of person on all levels?..do you want us to be just like a dog who speaks english too?


I've seen several of your questions on the boards and I gotta ask, do you really not know the answers to your questions or are you simply seeking validation of some kind? Or are you just unsure of what you are seeking and uncomfortable with your submissive desires? Obedience to another does not mean, nor should it ever necessitate that one gives up his ability to think for himself. Obedience only necessitates a willingness and desire to obey another...ideally that other will hold similar enough values and espouse a level of maturity and good judgment that obedience comes without ideological and/or ethical conflict. But surely, you know this.

MNN

_____________________________

aka Ms Petal - Check Me out on the Web.

(in reply to searchin4love)
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RE: upto wat level do you want us to submit? - 3/16/2008 1:14:00 PM   
khem


Posts: 300
Joined: 8/8/2005
Status: offline 		 No one knows everything, regardless of the title they're using.  I think in any relationship you're bound to learn things.  Goes both ways. 

I'd count it as a plus from a service angle if a submissive had knowledge or a skill I wanted to learn.  Dancing, for instance, is something I have always wanted to take classes in.  If a submissive was a dance instructor or a very good dancer, I would count his ability to teach me to dance as a plus. 

Now, on the other hand, cocky little shits who like to run off in the mouth about various topics I have no interest in so that they can sound good get ignored, gagged, or gagged & ignored.


< Message edited by khem -- 3/16/2008 1:15:18 PM >

(in reply to searchin4love)
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RE: upto wat level do you want us to submit? - 3/16/2008 1:29:44 PM   
searchin4love


Posts: 47
Joined: 3/15/2008
Status: offline 		@mistressnoname : nope i dont know. i am new and curious about this lifestyle.
yeah one of my question in general bdsm discussion submission:by birth or by conditioning is a kind of validation

(in reply to khem)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: upto wat level do you want us to submit? - 3/16/2008 2:14:16 PM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline 		Depends on the dominant.

I think that given my own experiences and those of others I've known in successful, happy long-term Ds or owner-slave dynamics, that the couples/triad/etc that work best have a large degree of compatibility as far as how they view the world and how they process information.

Compatible is not the same as identical.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to searchin4love)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: upto wat level do you want us to submit? - 3/16/2008 2:29:43 PM   
MistressVnus


Posts: 1036
Joined: 1/4/2008
From: Central Florida
Status: offline
quote:

do you want us to be just like a dog who speaks english too?


In fact, sometimes I want my slave to act like a dog and not be allowed to speak english at all.  Eat doggy bones.  Eat out of a doggy bowl. And only be allowed to communicate with a bark, wimper, moan, and whine.
Sometimes I like my slave to hump my leg, like the dog that he is, until he begs to come all over my boot.  And, I deny it.
But, I'm just sick like that.    Muuuwhahahahahaaha!!

You guys want to take all the fun out of it by worring too much about it de-masculinizing yourself.
Figure out the level you can handle.  Then look for a Domina that will begin there.
However, I assure you, if you find a Mistress that you spend some time with, you will be doing things, such as described above, that you swore you would never do.  And, you'll be loving it.


_____________________________

In the ties that bind,
Mistress Venus
http://www.mistressvenus.com

"I'm not IN the lifestyle. The lifestyle is in Me!"

(in reply to searchin4love)
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RE: upto wat level do you want us to submit? - 3/16/2008 2:39:29 PM   
MistressVnus


Posts: 1036
Joined: 1/4/2008
From: Central Florida
Status: offline
quote:

so are you willing to learn from your sub if he knows more than you about something..


How do you think some of us learned some of the stuff we know!!!!  We learned from playing with subs who could walk us through some activities with "respectful" guidance for our first "hands on" experiences.  Sometimes I had been schooled on a new procedure, but hadn't yet applied it.  A sub would come along who really enjoys that activity and, agreeable, would walk me through with good feed back, and without my having to look all secure in what I was doing.  And, making sure all went well.
I believe, like fistings, for example,  should be done, for the first time,  with an experienced person who knows you are trying for your first time and can walk you through.
I don't think, (I could be wrong), there is a Dominant around that can say they haven't learned things from the sub/slaves they have previously played with or had time with on some level.  It's what makes experience, be experience.


_____________________________

In the ties that bind,
Mistress Venus
http://www.mistressvenus.com

"I'm not IN the lifestyle. The lifestyle is in Me!"

(in reply to searchin4love)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: upto wat level do you want us to submit? - 3/16/2008 3:27:49 PM   
LadyHathor


Posts: 775
Joined: 1/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: searchin4love

thanks for the info :)
:) i know that its "what" as we are taught UK english in schools.but i sometimes write wat ..just like that..ofcourse not in formal letters and applications :)

yup i have seen some profiles those demanded complete submission while some were not like that...

so are you willing to learn from your sub if he knows more than you about something..


It depends on what he knows, at My age and with all I have done in My life, there is little to learn about managing a life and staying the course, however, I do expect one to have varied interests that  can expand My knowledge--and at times two heads can be  better than one, but at the end of the day, My decision is the one that stands.
 
<As for "wat", if you know the difference, why be lazy when typing?>

_____________________________

Lady Hathor, I am the Mistress Hathor of Orleans, I am what I am, often to the dismay and discomfort of others.

(in reply to searchin4love)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: upto wat level do you want us to submit? - 3/16/2008 3:38:08 PM   
MsStarlett


Posts: 1879
Joined: 12/23/2007
Status: offline 		Dittos to Lashra and MsVnus.  "Power exchange" can also mean "Informational Exchange".  Ignorent people are boring.   Broken toys are no fun.  ALL of my favorites are intelligent professional people with a great deal to bring to the table.  They are creative and imaginative and push my limits almost as far as I push thiers.  Some of them build my toys and furniture for me.  We design them together, find the supplies and I get to supervise the construction then we get to try them out together.  Could a talking dog do that for me?  One of my long term subs is my personal trainer at the gym.  I keep having to REMIND him that he only gets to tell me what to do when it comes to physical fittness.  He's a bullheaded New Yorker who enjoys trying to switch on me constantly.  I enjoy beating him back into his proper place.  It's what makes our relationship continuously FUN, fresh and interesting after 15 years.

(in reply to MistressVnus)
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RE: upto wat level do you want us to submit? - 3/16/2008 7:41:51 PM   
RumpusParable


Posts: 1923
Joined: 7/7/2005
From: NYC now!
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: searchin4love

by level i do not mean the extent to which a sub can endure pain and humilation..
i mean do you want us to completely shut down our thought process?
if my opinions about life,world and the philosophy to which i subscribe do not match with yours then will you ask me to change it to wat you believe..is submission a complete deindividualisation of person on all levels?..do you want us to be just like a dog who speaks english too?


To be completely frank and honest:  It depends on the sub/slave.

Some I want to strip down and objectify, pure and simply use them like non-human toys or tools to make me happy, my life easier, my wallet fuller, my hands and mind more skilled in a type of play, whatever...

Some I want to share long days adventuring with, discussing and debating with, getting to know them and letting them know me, helping them grow and growing with them, sharing intimate thoughts and moments with...

And lots of things inbetween.

Just depends on what desires, kinks and personality traits are triggered and line up between us.

_____________________________

Relationships come and go, but plastination is forever.

I generally use fast-reply. If directing my post at someone specific I will indicate so.

Minimal summary: Artist, Disabled Veteran, Vegan, Pornographer, and Agender dominant female.

(in reply to searchin4love)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: upto wat level do you want us to submit? - 3/16/2008 8:00:30 PM   
SunNMoon


Posts: 1058
Joined: 3/18/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: searchin4love
i mean do you want us to completely shut down our thought process?


No. Not at all. I’m with him because he’s smart and fun to talk to.  

quote:


if my opinions about life,world and the philosophy to which i subscribe do not match with yours then will you ask me to change it to wat you believe..is submission a complete deindividualisation of person on all levels?..do you want us to be just like a dog who speaks english too?


Now when it comes to life and ect, well I just tried to find someone that shared a lot of the same values. It’s still a relationship; I just get to be the boss a little bit more. He always has a say and he knows that I want to hear his thoughts and opinions about everything.
 
Also remember he choose to be submissive to me. It’s what makes him happy. If it didn’t make him happy, I wouldn’t want him to be submissive to me. Just think of it as people being able to be true to who they are.
 

_____________________________

"We agreed to S&M only, sex and mockery." - Gray’s Anatomy.

(in reply to searchin4love)
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RE: upto wat level do you want us to submit? - 3/16/2008 8:10:19 PM   
MissHarlet


Posts: 2728
Joined: 9/11/2005
From: El Paso , TX US
Status: offline 		I choose submissives who can be a Junior Partner.. who can converse intelligently .. has opinions and ideas ... but knows his place and knows that final decisions are mine ..

_____________________________

Protectress of hearts/souls of all submissives calling Bounty's Place home, by order of Bounty~Proprietor

To be respected you must be respectful, to be loved you must be willing to love,
to be trusted you must be willing to trust.

(in reply to SunNMoon)
Profile   Post #: 16
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