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recommended reading? - 3/19/2008 7:22:36 AM   
curiousub88


Posts: 16
Joined: 11/10/2007
Status: offline 		I'm a sub who is still waiting for my first time in this lifestyle. I was wondering if any subs could recommend a good book that teaches good attitudes or behavior as a sub or slave? I'm very interested in giving massages (foot, back and anything else desired) and didn't know if there were any specific books good for this. Anything would help, i just want to be a good sub for my first dom :).
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RE: recommended reading? - 3/19/2008 7:34:01 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		Hello curious
There are lots of BDSM books out there, but for specific services such as massage etc - my recommendation is to take a course on your chosen 'vocation'.  Books can't teach you those specifics, hands on is a much better and with a teacher you will learn much more.  I don't know where you are based, but I would search for local colleges etc for courses.
 
the.dark.

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RE: recommended reading? - 3/19/2008 7:39:46 AM   
curiousub88


Posts: 16
Joined: 11/10/2007
Status: offline 		I would eventually like to take some classes. It's just not extremely easy at the moment since i'm in college and working. Was hoping to take a summer course, but was hoping for something sooner because i'm really interested in it.

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RE: recommended reading? - 3/19/2008 7:43:54 AM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: curiousub88

I was wondering if any subs could recommend a good book that teaches good attitudes or behavior as a sub or slave?

mho, each of us have a unique personality/attitude/behavior which attracted our dominants to us.

no book or manual can teach you that.


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RE: recommended reading? - 3/19/2008 7:51:51 AM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
"freedom is slavery"
1984 - by: George Orwell

"Everything we do is based on agreements we have made - agreements with ourselves, with other people, with God, with life. But the most important agreements are the ones we make with ourselves. In these agreements we tell ourselves who we are, how to behave, what is possible, what is impossible. One single agreement is not such a problem, but we have many agreements that come from fear, deplete our energy, and diminish our self-worth."

The Four Agreements by: Don Miguel Ruiz

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RE: recommended reading? - 3/19/2008 9:10:51 AM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		Anything written by Dossie Easton, The Bottoming Book, The Topping Book, The Ethical Slut, etc.

Midori's book The Wild Side of Sex

Mistress Abernathy's book's, they combined them recently but they are called The Concise Slave Training Manual or something similar.  I know the title sounds like wank fodder and while on some level the book operates that way, at a deeper level it is quite explicit on how to make yourself a better person and thus a better partner.

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RE: recommended reading? - 3/19/2008 10:08:29 AM   
Archer


Posts: 3207
Joined: 3/11/2005
Status: offline 		I thought there was alot to be said for Jack Rinella's "Becoming a Slave"
Also enjoyed both of the Bob Rubel's books that I have read.



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RE: recommended reading? - 3/19/2008 10:42:06 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		Hello curious one
 
Just remember that all the books in the world won;t be able to 'tell' you how a specific dominant will want you to behave.  That comes down to personal preferences.  Just be yourself and don't force yourself to follow other peoples protocols because otherwise you are giving a false view of yourself.
Be yourself, act how you always would and you can't go wrong.
Practise some massage on yourself - legs, arms and stomach for now.  Learn how to give yourself beauty treaments if you can't find time to attend courses.  Start cooking for yourself good food - buy a cook book or trawl the net for receipes.  Teach yourself that way.
 
the.dark.

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RE: recommended reading? - 3/19/2008 4:41:21 PM   
lighthearted


Posts: 1165
Joined: 11/26/2006
Status: offline 		The Loving Dominant, by John Warren, even if you aren't a Dom/me.

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RE: recommended reading? - 3/20/2008 12:47:28 PM   
stella41b


Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
Status: offline 		Personally I'd recommend Paulo Coelho's book The Alchemist.

I'd also recommend a stage play, The Maids by Jean Genet based on the infamous Papin sisters Lea and Christine who brutally murdered their employer and daughter. The play is about two sides of the power divide and the intricate power dynamic which exists between unequals and the play goes into some details on the development of sadomasochistic rituals. The focus of the play is the roleplaying of the actual murder, where the maids take it in turn to play Madame whilst she's away, and the development of both the power dynamic and the sadomasochistic rituals.

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