petdave -> RE: Ok, my turn to troll (3/24/2008 12:08:54 AM)
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Hey, i could use some good trolling karma. Hope you won't mind if i roll it out narrative style. ** i shook my head in irritation. "Stupid paranoia!" Still, i was more relieved than i would like to admit when i saw them get up to go. It's really unnerving when you just keep catching somebody staring at you. Usually, it's somebody staring at me like they've never seen a long-haired, over-pierced freak in an obscene T-shirt before, and after a very cold return stare, or an exaggerated version of the Universal What-The-Fuck Gesture, they pointedly ignore me. However, i was not about to do this to Mr. Anabolic Steroids 2008 and his girlfriend, especially since i had the feeling that said girlfriend had caught me ogling her ass. Like, really badly. Like, with a chicken tender stuck freeze-frame on its way to my mouth. The kind of ass that makes you want to go out and do good deeds for the world, so that you can be reincarnated as a bicycle seat. Black Spandex tights, trendy knee-length boots, tiny shirt. No panties. One hell of an Evil Eye. Figures. So, i couldn't exactly pull a lot of moral high ground over a few looks in my direction. i'm not a small guy myself, and i'm not afraid to protect myself, but i'd rather avoid a dumb-ass argument then try to resolve one with my knife. So forget it. They want to stare, let them stare. i actually ticked off a minute after they left, figuring i'd give them three minutes to hit the parking lot and roll, before getting disgusted again. "STUPID" i muttered under my breath. i packed up my book, threw back the rest of my drink, and headed out. Like i'm going to get stuck in a big ambush just for looking at a girl. Stupid. As usual, my baby was near the back of the parking lot, under one of the lights. Walking doesn't bother me nearly as much as scratches do. i was pleased to see that the dark SUV parked next to her actually gave me enough room to open the door for a change. i stroked her hood affectionately on my way across. i had the door unlocked, and the handle in my hand when i heard a loud *SLAP* from the back of the car. Shocked, i whipped around and saw the woman from the restaurant, both hands on the trunk. "Hey, what the fuck!!?" She just raised an eyebrow at me in reply. That was when i remembered. Oh, shi... THUD. Muscle-boy slammed into me like a damned bull, trapping my right arm against the door of the car, knocking the breath out of me. i reached back fast with my left hand, over my head, trying to reach his face to get at an eye, and just as quickly his own arm slammed mine down onto the roof, weight and muscle and leverage keeping it trapped. Not good. "Hey! Listen-" was all i managed to gasp. As soon as my mouth opened, his other hand came down over it, smothering my protest, barely giving me enough air to breathe by. He had a rag in his hand, a towel or something that made it hard for me to try to bite him. It reeked- turpentine, paint thinner, something chemical. Motherfucker gonna give me birth defects. i choked back nausea at the partial breath i managed to get, and tried to twist out from under him. Pressed against the car, leaned forward, i had no leverage. My weight was mostly forward of my legs, so i couldn't push off. He was pressed up too close against me to try to kick. His left arm pinned mine down like a fallen tree. i yanked my head to the side, trying to get a clear breath and yell for help, but his hand clamped down harder over my face and followed it around. Now my head was twisted all the way to the left, and i couldn't even twist it back against his grip. i whipped my head backwards instead, trying to connect with his jaw, or preferably, his nose, but his face was nowhere to be found, and now he had my head pulled backwards, hard, putting pressure on my windpipe. The strain made it even harder to breathe, and i could barely draw another gasp of chemical haze. Damnit! i tried pulling forward, to try for another backwards head-butt, except that now he was holding me too tight, and my neck didn't have the strength. Frantic, i tried to wriggle my right arm out from under me, and he slammed me against the car again. The little breath i had blew out in a gasp, and i sucked in more poisoned air. i was getting dizzy. All the lights in the parking lot were fuzzy, haloed. Again he hit me with his entire body. i tried to twist my head free again, but it didn't move an inch. i sucked in as much air as i could through the little gaps between his fingers, and did my best to shout. "MMmmmm!" SLAM. He cut my surprisingly shrill scream off with another hard check against the car. "Don't kill him" came a cool, almost bored reprimand from behind us. i snuffled in another foul breath, seeing black around the edges of my vision, feeling myself start to slide down the side of the car. He was still pulling on my head, and i all i could see were fuzzy stars. They weren't staying put. The pressure wasn't letting up in the slightest. i slapped my hand against the roof, about the only thing i could do to even try to draw attention to us. Muscle-boy was breathing heavily at my back, but he hadn't spoken a word. Somebody flicked my ear, hard. What? Addled, i thought it must be a hallucination. Why the hell would somebody flick my ear at a time like this? "Stop that" came the hushed command. i gasped again, and tried to turn in the direction of the voice, and the flick. i couldn't turn. Another hard push, driving out my precious dollop of air. i didn't even see the stars now. Just haze. i tried desperately to draw in more air against all the force. Just a weak cough now. All at once, i wasn't being pressed against the car anymore. A strong arm swung across my chest, holding me up. Over the blood roaring in my ears, i head keys jingling, and my trunklid swinging up. Another soft command. "Put him in". With a grunt, i was bear-hugged up off the ground and carried, feet swung up into the huge trunk, with the rest of me following awkwardly. i was pushed back onto my side so that my right arm was free, then both arms were pulled forward, and handcuffs ratcheted down tightly onto my wrists. My vision was clearing, and now i could see the bright lights of the parking lot again as huge soft globes, shockingly normal in such a nightmare scene. Something was drawn tight around my ankles, violent and efficient. i kicked feebly with my legs, but they were stuck. i could wiggle my feet. Great. A familiar face, soft-focused, drew down into my line of sight. She stared at me intently for a long moment, still looking into my eyes as she spoke to her companion, very softly, very intense. "Very good. Once he's secured in the room, you'll get everything you asked for." She withdrew, the trunklid slammed shut. The floor shook as the engine turned over.
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