Suggestions from Submissives? (Full Version)

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tsatske -> Suggestions from Submissives? (3/23/2008 2:44:33 PM)

At the risk of getting a list of links from LA, which would be okay, too, afterall, that would answer the question, i guess -
i have asked my Master for permission to join a Submissives support group/list. i am talking about a closed list, open only to other submissives, slaves, possibly switches when in 'sub' mode while on the list, no trolling. Usually there is a rule about confidentiality of what is discussed on the list, not sharing it with others, with non-list members, or esp. with Doms, tops, Masters. Which is why i asked for permission, since normally Master access my mail, ect, as much as He wishes.
Now, having gotten permission, i only need to find a group. A group focused on slaves, and the M/s, TPE, dynamic, would be awesome, but any suggestion would be welcome. i have belonged to such lists before, but I don't now, and i don't know where to find any.
Yahoo no longer allows searching of 'adult' groups. Plus, now that yahoo has taken over most group servers in the world, they have kind of ruined many types of 'serious' groups. Like writers groups. i used to belong to really good writers groups, for instance. Now, the only 'writers' groups you can find on Yahoo, even though those are searchable, is the 'Let me post lots of crappy poetry and don't you dare give me honest assessments because i poured my heart and soul into this crappy poetry and i don't want suggestions. '
So, does anyone belong to a great subbie list that is taking new members?




MasterFireMaam -> RE: Suggestions from Submissives? (3/23/2008 3:14:19 PM)

Let me ask around on LJ....

Master Fire




MasterFireMaam -> RE: Suggestions from Submissives? (3/23/2008 6:47:03 PM)

Here are some of the answers I got. I do not know any of these groups, personally, except slave kristan's. I do recommend her's, if it's still active. Overall, remember that nothing beats real life interaction.

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my group Exquisite Enslavement is for slaves only. But it is obly for 24/7 TPE slaves. The webaddress is http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Exquisite_Enslavement

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WMPE Submissive Discussions is a group that meets real time in Western Mass, but they have a yahoo group as well. http://groups.yahoo.com/group/wmpesubmissivediscussions/

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http://latches.webslaves.com/index.htm
LATCHES has an email list that is all-female submissive yahoo group. There is also a "mentor" group called SIEVE for those who have less than one year real life experience

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Ma'am, Kristan has the group sub-slave support society at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/sub-slavesupportsociety/?yguid=161819601
but i'm not sure she is taking new member now

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This is great group
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/artofslavery/

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Master Fire




tsatske -> RE: Suggestions from Submissives? (3/23/2008 7:19:11 PM)

Thank you, Mistress Fire. While I would agree in many ways that nothing beats real life, we are already active in a munch, with regular parties, and attend conferences. The social life is, for me, one of the greatest benefits of the lifestyle.
However, it is a very rare to find an in person sub only support group. There was one, well, is one, in my hometown, but I don't know of one near me now, and there has not been one in any of the other cities i've lived in, at least not that I found. While real life interaction is crucial, sub to sub communication is also sometimes crucial, a place to get and give feedback from others like oneself, every now and then, without Doms overlooking, no offense to yourself, :).




Boondoggle -> RE: Suggestions from Submissives? (3/23/2008 8:04:02 PM)

Tsatske, have you thought about starting one? I know there's one in town here that meets monthly and is fairly well attended, though I've never been. I honestly would have expected them to be rather ubiquitous, and if you're searching for one, you're probably not the only one in the community looking for that.




MRandme -> RE: Suggestions from Submissives? (3/24/2008 3:57:55 AM)

Might i suggest SubDen? http://groups.yahoo.com/group/sub_den/  This group has helped me a great deal, not only by answering questions for me, but by seeing the questions others have asked.

Also, i did start a local subby/slave munch that is beginning to gain some steam. We started with three of us meeting on a regular basis and now are gaining members every month, one at a time. You can do the same in your area.  Nothing beats sitting face to face with others, laughing and giggling and sharing stories.

Hope this helps you!

g




mistoferin -> RE: Suggestions from Submissives? (3/24/2008 5:58:09 AM)

Submissive only groups can be both a good and bad thing. I would strongly recommend that you not become involved in one that has a rule that you can not discuss things with your own Dominant, at least those things that pertain to your own relationship. I don't think it would be appropriate to relate intimate details of what is going on in the lives of others, but I do think it is very appropriate to discuss with him the advice you get in regards to your own situation.

I have known many of these groups over the years and I have to caution you that sometimes they can be counterproductive to your relationship. I do understand the need to socialize and be able to find like minded people who really understand your own perspective....but in the end the most important person to be discussing things with is the one you have turned over your life to.




littleg -> RE: Suggestions from Submissives? (3/24/2008 10:05:34 AM)

This is my first post a forum although I read them frequently looking for exactly the same thing.. I desperately hope that I have just found a speciall Dom to whom i would gladly give myself..I want to learn to serve him and also to know about myself as a sub..Can't exactly ask the girfriends about that....Please start one and I will gladly join...I have found Searching for Submission just today.   




MRandme -> RE: Suggestions from Submissives? (3/24/2008 5:55:30 PM)

i do agree that communication with the Dominant is the most important thing, but there are times when you need  to lean on a peer and ask their advice.

It's kind of nice to compare reactions to similar scenes, to ask "am i the only one who..." or to simply giggle together. And to do it face to face is simply the best!

g





mistoferin -> RE: Suggestions from Submissives? (3/24/2008 7:06:18 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MRandme

i do agree that communication with the Dominant is the most important thing, but there are times when you need  to lean on a peer and ask their advice.

It's kind of nice to compare reactions to similar scenes, to ask "am i the only one who..." or to simply giggle together. And to do it face to face is simply the best!


Yup, I agree. The problem with submissive "only" groups that have such rules is that it doesn't ever seem to take long for them to turn into a safe place to bash their dominants. One side of the story comes out and before you know it they are all jumping on the "you deserve better" bandwagon....and well....I guess you can figure out where it usually goes from there.

Don't get me wrong, the idea of an all submissive group is awesome to me if it could be a place of sharing, laughter and comraderie.....I've just never seen one that was actually able to accomplish that. In the short term maybe, but in the long term it always seems to end up as a gossiping, meddling, catfighting competition to see who is doing it right and who is "subbier" than the next....or on the flip side it can become the place where some submissives turn to get sympathy and validation by presenting half the story. Her dominant ends up being the "asshole" of course....at least until the two actually break up and then all her "subbie sisters" are lining up to try their luck at him.

Yup, I've been to a couple of those "submissive only" groups.......




Sirsinini -> RE: Suggestions from Submissives? (3/24/2008 7:22:59 PM)

latches is an excellent group




MRandme -> RE: Suggestions from Submissives? (3/25/2008 3:05:01 AM)

mistoferin,

i'm sorry that you've had bad experiences before.

Our group is a core of friends first, who happen to be subs/slaves. If one of them wanted a crack at my Master, all she would have to do is ask... i'd drive her there and hope i'd be allowed to join in!  (i have very cuddly and sexy friends!)

Additionally, i am the main organizer of the group. It is not a forum for disrespect of our Dominant halves, it is a place to grow as a submissive and to help mentor those who are new to the lifestyle. If i felt it were beginning to devolve into that, whoever was the instigator would not be invited back!

We have a friend who is not allowed to join the group. We were all very worried about her as we felt her Sir was... uncomfortably strict.  None of us bashed Him though. We merely asked if she was happy and when she replied that she was, it was enough.  There is always the realization that what doesn't work for one of us maybe be right for another.

i hope that others can find this sort of support circle, either online or off.

g





MasterFireMaam -> RE: Suggestions from Submissives? (3/25/2008 3:08:19 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: tsatske

Thank you, Mistress Fire.


While a title isn't necessary, if you're going to use one for me, please use Master. Thanks!

I'd love to hear if the groups are decent or not, if you're willing to let me know in a few months.

Master Fire




tsatske -> RE: Suggestions from Submissives? (3/25/2008 8:38:53 AM)

Sorry, Master Fire. I thought I typed your nick directly from your post, and i still got it wrong! You see, THIS is why i prefer to simply cut and paste![:-]




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