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Griswold -> I was just thinking.... (3/25/2008 4:07:31 PM)
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I saw an article on the web a while back about a guy who had ooodles and ooodles of money.
He was looking for a wife...it was about a year or so ago...he was very specific about what he wanted, and he said something like "I have a net worth of 30 million dollars. If we fall in love and marry, I'll give you $500,000.00 for every year we're married", and then went on to explain that this could easily amount to millions, described his homes in various locales, etc.
Anyway...he had something like 3,000 offers within about 10 days.
So it occurred to me, I have something to offer along these lines as well...and what better place to offer it than here?
I have a 50 dollar bill somewhere around here. I know I do because I remember having 200 bucks last Friday, and I remember clearly spending about 135 of it at a nearby bar, then I remember equally as clearly stopping at the store on the way home to grab some milk and a pack of Marlboros.
Surely that leaves about 50 bucks.
If we marry, and you help me find that fifty bucks...it's yours. No lawyers, no rebuttal...and you don't even have to stay married to me for 20 years to get it.
I have a coin jar. Every night I put my change in it. (That won't stop when I get married, by the way).
It has a LOT of coins in it.
(Some are quarters!...I even saw a Euro in the mix last Tuesday when I was hunting for coffee money...that's gotta be worth damn near a buck fifty!).
I have close to 200 old VCR tapes...in about 6 more years, those will be worth BIG bucks! I also have 3 working VCR's.
If you become my betrothed...I'll give you half of whatever we get out of that sale. No questions asked.
I will let the big cat sleep on your stomach just like I've let him sleep on mine for years. No selfish issues here, that's for sure.
If I get up before you and you have a really important meeting that day...I promise I will always be absolutely certain to leave no less than 4 minutes of hot water in the water tank for your shower.
Okay....5.
(I know...I'm a giver...it's been said before).
On Valentines day, I will never forget to bring you flowers. Ever. (Why do you think I keep those plastic ones in the little Costco tarp carport...just in case?).
So....anyway, it just clicked today that I have as much to offer as that other guy....so why not just extend my hand?
So there you have it ladies.
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