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RE: Do i give up on something that can be great? - 3/27/2008 2:51:33 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
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No, you're not being selfish. You are allowed to want what you want. However, starting a relationship, or continuing a relationship, based on trying to get your partner to change is a bad idea. Change is hard and therefor unlikely. If you cannot handle being second in his life, you need to move on, as much as it hurts. But, if you want to be first, hanging around and being constantly shown that you are second would be a worse, and continuing, hurt. If he's going to change, let him do it on his own, then come back to you.

Master Fire


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(in reply to subkay2neil)
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RE: Do i give up on something that can be great? - 3/27/2008 3:11:11 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline
This relationship could never be great. There are too many barriers and obstaces. When the right Master comes along , he will want what you want and wont be afraid of his "feelings". It will just flow. This does not flow.

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(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
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RE: Do i give up on something that can be great? - 3/28/2008 1:24:28 AM   
Maya2001


Posts: 1656
Joined: 8/22/2007
From: Woodstock ONT,CANADA
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He is feeling guilty as he is betraying the trust of his partner and his child, he made a commitment to them  which overrides any commitment to you, he has a lot more to lose by leaving them then he has be leaving you or by getting found out , if she finds out it puts his relationship with his child in jeopardy that relationship is far more important than you are, and your begging to keep him has the potential to destroy his current relationship with his child and current partner.

He knows he has to end the relationship with you but  does not want to look like the bad guy any more than he has to , so is hoping  you will bow out gracefully ....why do you think he sent you to this site???  ....because he knows we will tell you to end things and find someone else.  So you  will either have to suck it up and leave him  with your dignity intact and head held high or  you can let him tell you to f-off because it has to end ...one way or the other


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RE: Do i give up on something that can be great? - 3/28/2008 1:48:16 AM   
blissy


Posts: 94
Joined: 9/12/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

Quit trying to force yourself on him and let it go.


i think this would be the best thing to do, i mean sit yourself down & look to see if you can see yourself & where you will be in a years time if you try hanging on. Sometimes you just have to let go.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There should be a button on a profile page (married-single-divorced)

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RE: Do i give up on something that can be great? - 3/28/2008 1:49:48 AM   
eyesopened


Posts: 2798
Joined: 6/12/2006
From: Tampa, FL
Status: offline
Although i'm not fluent, i know enough Guyspeak to translate a little for you.
quote:

he has asked me to consider what i want... as he has a family he cant provide me with the attention i need as sub.

Translation: I want to break up with you but I want it to be your decision so I won't look like a bad guy.  From now on I will be using my family as the primary reason to not be with you.
quote:

he has said to me to think things over

Translation:  I'm going to give you some time to get used to the idea of us breaking up so that you won't go all psycho on me.

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RE: Do i give up on something that can be great? - 3/31/2008 6:45:49 AM   
Silkendream


Posts: 65
Joined: 10/29/2007
Status: offline
i think i love you, domiguy *gazes up at him all starry eyed

is there any chance you could write a male female phrase book at all?

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RE: Do i give up on something that can be great? - 3/31/2008 12:23:17 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline
Give him six months to see if he can reconnect with his partner who is the mother of his child. Let them work on their issues without him having you in the background. Because as long as he's in a relationship with you, he won't be capable of really working on issues with his partner. Suggest they try marriage counseling.

If he tries with his whole heart and they can't fix their relationship, and decide to separate, it is at that time that he should then contract you. But he can't invest all his emotions in that relationship while more than half of them are already invested in you.

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(in reply to softness)
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RE: Do i give up on something that can be great? - 3/31/2008 2:20:29 PM   
kiwisub12


Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
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Having any sort of emotional relationship with someone who is in a  primary relationship with someone else who doesn't know about you two is cheating!!  Big no-no!!!!
Now, if she knew  about it??????

And there is a kid involved!!!!   He wants a bit of strange without strings attached, and the idea of love is scaring the crap out of him.
Quit wasting your time with this emotional jerkoff- and get out to where you may be able to find someone who is actually able to commit to you.

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 28
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