Respect; what's it to ya?

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Respect; what's it to ya? - 3/30/2008 7:45:38 AM

charmdpetKeira

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Raises her hand slowly… I don’t get it; again.

At one time, I understood the word the way many people posting to another thread, going on in GBD are saying, respect is something that is earned; lately, I’ve had other thoughts.

I do not need to know someone in order to have respect for them, or their abilities, or lack there of. Further more, I have just as much respect for animals, inanimate objects, and situations, as I would people.

The day the babysitter's bull jumped the fence and came charging at me, I had no problem showing it proper respect, by running my scrawny butt around the nearest big ass bow pine, as fast as I could, until her daughter came out to rescue me.

My respect for electricity came from my mother catching me playing with an electrical outlet.

Right about the time she offered to get me “a nail or something”, to help me in my endeavor of understanding what was in those little holes, I decided I most likely wanted no part of what she was offering.

Well that, and the same babysitter’s daughter, continually telling me it was okay to touch the electric fence, she had turned it off.

I had respect for her slightly sadistic sense of humor, as well.

So I guess my question is, is admiration necessary for respect?

k

< Message edited by charmdpetKeira -- 3/30/2008 7:46:48 AM >

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RE: Respect; what's it to ya? - 3/30/2008 8:03:45 AM

colouredin

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I tend to respect everyone as a human being from the get go but there is a differance between base respect and admiring respect. Some people I respect because they are smart or loyal or confident or whatever thats a differant kind of respect. The only people I dont respect are those that have done something to lose it.

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RE: Respect; what's it to ya? - 3/30/2008 9:19:24 AM

Level

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Good morning, k. For me, I guess I would admire anyone I respected.

Now, I may like someone that I don't respect (sounds strange, doesn't it?), and I may not like someone that I do respect.

Here's an interesting link to an article on respect: http://plato.stanford.edu/entries/respect

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RE: Respect; what's it to ya? - 3/30/2008 9:24:31 AM

ShareMyDream

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Respect to me is admiring someone for their proven abilities, character or achievements.

This is a separate thing from common courtesy which should be given to everyone.

Electric fences can be fun but not if you urinate on them I’m told.

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RE: Respect; what's it to ya? - 3/30/2008 11:03:37 AM

CalifChick

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Admiration isn't necessary for respect. But the word "respect" can mean many things.

For instance, it can mean "understand the power of"... as in a couple of your examples. With the bull, you understand the power of that animal to hurt you in ways that you won't like, so you get out of its way. Same with electricity. And the sadistic humor, well, that could go either way (I'm not sure with the way you said it), it could be "understand the power of" or it could be "admire".

In the thread talking about it, someone wanted to be acknowledged as being worthy of respect by all merely by her longevity in the lifestyle. But the respect she wanted was that she was the UberQueen of BDSM, not the UberQueen of StickingItOutIntheLifestyle. Now I don't really equate respect with simple longevity, as longevity can just mean you're too lazy to do anything else (witness my kids parking their butts in front of the tv for eons).

I can respect and admire someone's skills, without having admiration for them. For instance, there is a mental health professional that I worked with for a while, and he was absolutely fantastic with people with Down Syndrome exhibiting behavior problems. There was one teen that wouldn't look at anybody, wouldn't talk to anybody, would run out of his house naked and would take off down the street (and the parents and neighbors would chase him down). After a while of being in therapy with this doc, the teen would walk into the office, greet everybody, tell us jokes, etc. The work this doc did with him was phenomenal. HOWEVER (and you knew this was coming), he treated the staff badly, his peers badly (cheated them out of their rightful profits in the joint business), felt that he was above the law (and got his hand slapped for it), etc. So I have no admiration for him as a human being, but I do respect his skills in that one area so much that I do give his name out to people needing that kind of help.

Cali

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RE: Respect; what's it to ya? - 3/30/2008 12:26:40 PM

charmdpetKeira

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Thank you all for responding.

I’ve been thinking about my examples, and am not sure I have interpreted the situations correctly.

The situation with the bull; I watched that thing jump the fence and charge up the hill. I was scared shitless; frozen. It wasn’t until it was almost on me, that I ran, and I’m not even sure how I managed that.

The thing with my mom; I was afraid of her too. It was the look on her face and tone of voice that told me I wanted none of what she was offering. Then again, with those two factors, it could have been my favorite ice cream, with a cherry on top, and I wouldn’t have wanted it.

Level,

Very interesting link; it will take me a while to read it all.

I was happy to see the question has been contemplated by many in my field of interests.

What I have read so far has raise some more questions for me.

I’m no longer sure I actually respect anyone, including myself; though I will say, I accept myself, and am learning to do this with all things.

Also, there are those I admire, and those who have abilities I admire

I think it is the knowledge or lack there of, of a person or situation, I am acting respectful towards.

Another thing, I am unsure as to why.

I learned the other day why I have a hard time relating to other people's perspectives, even here, without them telling me how they see things, and I am not sure the same reason does not affect my perspective on this, as well.

Cali,

Thank you for sharing the story.

My best,

k

< Message edited by charmdpetKeira -- 3/30/2008 12:28:36 PM >

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RE: Respect; what's it to ya? - 3/30/2008 12:51:57 PM

cjan

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I respect everyone unless and untill they show me that they are not respectable. Admiration, on the other hand, is a whole different thing, and must be earned. I also think it's important to respect oneself. It is primary.

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RE: Respect; what's it to ya? - 3/30/2008 1:09:25 PM

charmdpetKeira

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It seems to me, respect is a trick word.

It means too many things, that may or may not be combined in any given situation.

I don’t think I like it, but I will accept it.

*grins*

My best,

k

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