RE: Sometimes, regardless of intent...

RE: Sometimes, regardless of intent... (Full Version)

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hopelesslyInvo -> RE: Sometimes, regardless of intent... (4/1/2008 10:29:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PhoenixRed quote: ORIGINAL: hopelesslyInvo i have a viewpoint or belief that many would probably find insulting, but in part with it; i would find it more comforting if you were to cry with me. Oh frack, why the hell would that ever be insulting! Emotions are emotions, we all have them. If we can share them and help each other through the hard times, more power to all of us! believe me i left 100% of my beliefs that would seem insulting out of my post, i'm just saying what that reasoning would lead me to feel given the situation.

Pyrrsefanie -> RE: Sometimes, regardless of intent... (4/1/2008 10:30:48 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PhoenixRed I suppose it may be a moot point, and it has been discussed on the boards before, but sometimes I still feel that me having a "human weakness" is not the thing to do at the time in crisis, especially when it had much more of an emotional impact on him than me. Guess there is really not a question, per se, here. Maybe I'm just down, and so used to supporting others that at times like this, I wonder...who supports me? I struggle with the same questions and feelings myself, Phoenix. I'm a big-time empath -- all someone around me has to do is sniffle, and I start bawling. My condolences to you and your slave. I had to put my German shepherd down several years ago and it was one of the most heartbreaking experiences I've ever had to endure. I still get tears in my eyes when I think about it. In my opinion, the two of you are supporting each other. You both feel the same pain, so why not take solace in each other's company?

PhoenixRed -> RE: Sometimes, regardless of intent... (4/1/2008 11:21:41 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Pyrrsefanie I struggle with the same questions and feelings myself, Phoenix. I'm a big-time empath -- all someone around me has to do is sniffle, and I start bawling. My condolences to you and your slave. I had to put my German shepherd down several years ago and it was one of the most heartbreaking experiences I've ever had to endure. I still get tears in my eyes when I think about it. In my opinion, the two of you are supporting each other. You both feel the same pain, so why not take solace in each other's company? Thanks very much. I am actually very comforted to find that there are other empaths out there that can sympathize with this situation. I didn't even think when I wrote that, just wrote the way things are...but looking back, I worried that people may think I'm "full of it" for talking about being empathic. He tried so hard to be the "strong man", but I SO felt all that pain and grief. I have to say, my dog is the same age, 13. I know I only have a limited time left with him, and when he does go, I am going to need my mate, my slave and anyone else I can find to help me thorough it cause I'm going to be a total basket case. My dog is my only child. OK, nuff of that. My dog is still alive and doing very well. I've just adopted the mindset that I will treasure the time I had with him, and the years that he enriched my life. Just makes me examine my own mortality and the mortality of those around me sometimes. You are right....we felt the same pain and we did take solace in each other's company, no matter how brief a time that was. Thanks again.

chezzy52 -> RE: Sometimes, regardless of intent... (4/2/2008 1:22:28 AM)
PhoenixRedmit would have bothered me more if you didn't at least show one tear.Sometimes being in control is not the proper thing to be or do.To me,you still showed plenty of control just by being there.

Politesub53 -> RE: Sometimes, regardless of intent... (4/2/2008 2:25:53 AM)
Human first, D or s type second. Everyone has moments, when somethings are more important that worrying about how we are perceived. The main thing is You were there when he needed You. That really is all that counts.

MissMagnolia -> RE: Sometimes, regardless of intent... (4/2/2008 2:35:43 AM)
OP, you're not a Domme, you're a human being who has a dominant personality. You always have been, and always will be, a human being first. I cry when I see death, I cry when I see a life being born, I laugh at something funny, I hug when someones feeling sad, I eat when I'm hungry, and on it goes. You did a wonderful thing for someone and you showed your humanity too. It doesn't matter if it was with your sub or a complete stranger. Never be afraid to be what you are.

MistressVnus -> RE: Sometimes, regardless of intent... (4/2/2008 6:27:39 AM)
quote: Maybe I'm just down, and so used to supporting others that at times like this, I wonder...who supports me? Believe it or not, a sub/slave really likes to be able to "comfort" their Mistress from time to time. It makes them feel as though their "service" has a value. And, if he is male, almost ALL MALES have the "white-knight-syndrome." They NEED to feel that they can come to the rescue and be a comfort for you. Just allow yourself to be human and allow him to be your comfort at times. Him seeing you emote may have helped him more than you know. It's kind of like sending the message to your sub that, hey, it's okay to FEEL, and GRIEVE. A very necessary process to get through a loss.

thetammyjo -> RE: Sometimes, regardless of intent... (4/2/2008 8:10:43 AM)
You need to find people who will be supportive of you. Guess what? That can be a lover, a slave, a friend, a family member. I recommend that you not be in relationships with anyone who can't give you as much support as you offer them. Other than young offspring, I can't imagine how a one-sided support dynamic can be very healthy for an adult to have.

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