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RE: What do you expect? - 4/2/2008 1:25:35 PM

metalmiss

Posts: 341
Joined: 5/4/2005
From: Croydon, UK
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This will be different for everyone..
i live with my Master, when we're not playing our dynamic is still always very much there. He is Dominant and i am slave.. That is not dependant on whether He has a cane in His hand or not.
We fill our quiet time with conversation, discussing the in's and out's of what make's us tick.. The world around us.. Our interests, whether they are things we have in common or not, a difference between partners can often be a great opportunity for learning. The vast majority of topics we cover are either kink/scene related, or directly refer to the way we relate to each other within our dynamic. This is probably due to the fact that our relationship is 99% centred around the fact that He is Master & i am slave. All of our friends & acquaintences are directly involved in the scene/lifestyle.. So in a sense we are surrounded by it completely.
We weren't friends before He took me. We didn't do the "get to know you" thing. We both knew what we were looking for and found it in each other.
In our case this was & is no bad thing.. Ours is a lifestyle choice, for us its serious, not something fun that we switch on every so often when we're feeling a little horny, but otherwise keep hidden. Sure we watch movies together.. We do "normal" things just like "normal" people do.. i guess the difference is we are just more aware of each other in a deep and brutally honest manner that vanilla relationships would struggle to incorporate. In my opinion we have all that could be found in a vanilla relationship and more.

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"The longing to serve, to submit, to abandon oneself sexually, emotionally, and physically makes one a slave either to a Man, a Woman or to God. Submission to that passion is divine degradation." - Dorothy C. Hayden

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RE: What do you expect? - 4/2/2008 2:20:16 PM

kiwisub12

Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline

beths post said it all. Always sub, Sir is always dom.
i wouldn't want it any other way.
its very freeing not to have to worry about reading the other - expectations are laid out and very clear - no game playing for us!
I am not good at reading sub plots- if someone tells me something that is what i react to, so in our situation i can be comfortable and relaxed, because we have had all discussions already.
viva la DSM relationship!!

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RE: What do you expect? - 4/2/2008 4:41:57 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
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I expect us to enjoy as much of our time together as possible.

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RE: What do you expect? - 4/2/2008 4:48:57 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
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Lover and best friend. Without that I wouldn't be here. I need more than fun and games. I need someone there for me who wants me there for him.

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RE: What do you expect? - 4/2/2008 7:56:58 PM

kallisto

Posts: 1185
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BIllCT

When the relationship is based on D/s or BDSM amd you put aside the kinks and sex itself. what exactly do you expect between a Dom and Submissive or slave, when not playing?

That depends on the kind of relationship you want. If it's just a play relationship, then that may be all that is needed for the relationship to work - play compatibility.

If it's a long term, love relationship, then there has to be mutual wants, needs, and desires for that relationship to work. For me, the D/s relationship goes much deeper than just playing. I want it all. I want to be completely fulfilled with my Dom in all aspects of life. Being a sub doesn't begin and end with me just in the bedroom. It's who I am.

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Post #: 25