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RE: Excuse Me - 4/8/2008 7:43:13 PM

yidproquo

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quote:

Though, i will say that i believe that for a bisexual woman to remain monagomous to a man and to never sleep with women (or a woman) on the side (openly and honestly, of course) would be unhealthy. It's seldom wise to deny such an important side of one's self, i learned as much when i went vanilla for five years after a particularly bad incident at a club.

I think this perspective gives too much credit to gender and not enough to everything else. Like, if someone is equally attracted to fat men and thin men, why wouldn't it be equally unhealthy to be in a monogamous relationship with a thin man?

Some people (yes, even some bisexuals) are wired for monogamy. It might be unwise for them to deny that very important part of themselves.

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RE: Excuse Me - 4/8/2008 9:33:42 PM

LadyHugs

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Dear devil1963, Ladies and Gentlemen;

I think God created the human body, with great beauty regardless of 'gender.'

There is much for me to admire about the human body as well, as to take advantage of the strengths and weaknesses of the body. Some techniques in sadism will work on either gender and some have more pronounced responses due to gender.

However, all human beings are more than 'gender.' The body is merely the vehicle and sexuality is not necessarily running just on gender alone--the mind is an area which needs to be included as well as the personal attraction beyond 'sexuality' for me.

I am Heterosexual and greatly attracted to men however, my taste in men are for the masculine male--not the femmie male. Leathermen are the gentlemen who draw me most as well as appreciated the most, especially if they practice formal protocols and or military based protocols.

I do know I am multi-dimentional so, I expect those who submit will be as well; to include how they carry their body. It is how the body is presented that will attract me more than the gender alone.

I admire the art of the body very much. Being 'masterful' in domination and sadism--I enjoy adding to that art dimention when possible.

Just some thoughts.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

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Post #: 42

RE: Excuse Me - 4/8/2008 10:23:21 PM

undergroundsea

Posts: 2400
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From: Austin, TX
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quote:

ORIGINAL: darchChylde
Though, i will say that i believe that for a bisexual woman to remain monagomous to a man and to never sleep with women (or a woman) on the side (openly and honestly, of course) would be unhealthy. It's seldom wise to deny such an important side of one's self, i learned as much when i went vanilla for five years after a particularly bad incident at a club.

I think this statement would apply only to those for whom regular sexual activity with each sex is essential to sexual expression. To the extent bisexuality is simply sexual attraction to each sex, I think a bisexual woman can be happy and healthy in a monogamous relationship without sleeping with other women just as a heterosexual woman can be happy and healthy in a monogamous relationship without sleeping with other men whom she might see as attractive.

Cheers,

Sea

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RE: Excuse Me - 4/8/2008 11:36:19 PM

Pyrrsefanie

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quote:

ORIGINAL: undergroundsea
To the extent bisexuality is simply sexual attraction to each sex, I think a bisexual woman can be happy and healthy in a monogamous relationship without sleeping with other women just as a heterosexual woman can be happy and healthy in a monogamous relationship without sleeping with other men whom she might see as attractive.

I would like to submit to the court Exhibit P -- Pyrrsefanie, who is living proof of this!

Although somehow I think that if I said to my boy "Pet, what would you think if I brought home another girl to play with?" he wouldn't complain too much. In fact he'd probably drop to his knees and weep tears of joy.

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Post #: 44

RE: Excuse Me - 4/9/2008 5:20:22 AM

ShaktiSama

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quote:

ORIGINAL: darchChylde
Though, i will say that i believe that for a bisexual woman to remain monagomous to a man and to never sleep with women (or a woman) on the side (openly and honestly, of course) would be unhealthy. It's seldom wise to deny such an important side of one's self, i learned as much when i went vanilla for five years after a particularly bad incident at a club.

Again, you're talking about being poly, not bi. There's nothing being "denied" when a monogamous person is monogamous, to a person of either sex, whether he/she is bisexual or not. It's when you're polyamorous and you try to be monogamous that you're in denial--and this is true whether you're straight, bi or gay.

Sorry to be a stickler about this, but I get very sick of people who cannot tell the difference between bisexual and polyamorous. The two are not mutually exclusive, by any means--but neither are they automatically the same thing.

I am bisexual--I am NOT automatically poly. And more than one man has destroyed his relationship with me utterly by assuming that I was. When I am in a serious relationship with a man, I am not "in denial" because I don't want anyone else in my bed. I am not automatically going to be thrilled when he drags home a hot little femme sub for me to dominate because I'm bi--any more than I woiuld automatically be thrilled if he dragged home another guy for me to dominate because I was straight.

Be careful about this sort of thing. Seriously. Your ego aside, when you're talking about someone else's sexuality, it's best to know what your terms mean.

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RE: Excuse Me - 4/9/2008 5:48:53 AM

darchChylde

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Did i say anything about polyamoury? No, i did not. i know very well the definitions of both bisexuality and polyamoury, and the differences between the two. Those who have responded to me seemed to latch on to one aspect of my post and ignore my point entirely. It is unhealthy and unwise to deny your nature; it may be managable for the short term, but eventually there will be consequences. i have no interest in carrying on a fruitless debate with those who seek to practice such deliberate obstinacy, so i'm going to step out of this thread and hope it can return back to the topic from which i had inadvertantly derailed it.

< Message edited by darchChylde -- 4/9/2008 5:50:45 AM >

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RE: Excuse Me - 4/9/2008 7:00:21 AM

aidan

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quote:

ORIGINAL: darchChylde

It is unhealthy and unwise to deny your nature; it may be managable for the short term, but eventually there will be consequences.

True enough. Nobody is denying that, in fact. What is being denied is that non-monogamous relationships are in fact the inherent nature of bisexual human beings. The postulation, put forth by at least two Dommes who know themselves and shown to be honest, level-headed posters in the past is that, yes, you can be bisexual and monogamous and suffer no harm from it.

Just because we disagree with you doesn't mean we're ignoring you.

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RE: Excuse Me - 4/9/2008 7:20:52 AM

ShaktiSama

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It's not a surprise that there is confusion about this subject--there are a number of porn-fueled assumptions about bisexuals that are rife in both the gay and straight communities. Most of which have to do with the confusion between bisexuality and polyamoury--or just plain nymphomania, for that matter.

Many people--including some bisexuals!--are guilty of using the term "bisexual" synonymously with "polyamorous". Which is why both gay and straight people who are inclined to monogamous relationships have a tendency to fear and even ostracize bisexuals. We get blamed for every community ill from broken homes to venereal diseases--if you want an example of this kind of thing, read the incredibly bile-filled anti-bisexual ranting from gay pundit Dan Savage.

The core assumption from all quarters seems to be that a bisexual person is incapable of mongamy and will inevitably be unfaithful to their monogamous partners because it is their nature to be unfaithful.

This crap gets old. Quite frankly, I see good and plenty of polyamorous (or downright adulterous/treacherous) behavior among pure heterosexual and homosexual people; it's not a strictly bisexual trait. And speaking solely for myself, as a bisexual domme--if I was going to do anything polyamorous in life, I'd go purely heterosexual, and keep a harem of male wives!

Why? Because an army of sexy boysubs in hakamas and tribal tattoos is hot.

I now return you to your regularly scheduled programming.

I'll be in my bunk.

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RE: Excuse Me - 4/9/2008 5:22:34 PM

MistressRouge

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I find the male and female form sexually arousing, more lust with the ladies I must say, but enjoy both sexes.

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