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LadyPact -> RE: Newbies should/shouldn't...says who? (4/8/2008 2:16:32 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: DelilahDeb
quote:
ORIGINAL: LadyPact
As hard as it is to understand, jen, you have to realize that not every new person is like you when you were new. Not everybody is going to take the time to understand themselves enough to know what they're ready for and what they're not. Not everyone is going to learn how to use a particular toy before deciding the first time they pick it up they are going to use it on a person.
It isn't about limiting anyone's possible experiences or activities. Hell, I'm the first person to say get away from the computer and get out into the world. In the same breath, I tell them to remember what they need for their own safety.
There's new, and there's new. - The 22-year-old collegiate who said after a mild flogging that he had gone "beyond his wildest dreams of total ecstasy" — could he give informed consent to the extremer forms of play? doubtful. Is he equipped to judge a top's experience with potentially deadly play? Damned unlikely.
- The 42-year-old Rennie who has played with live steel weapons for decades and who chooses to begin her dommely career with knife play is also new. Is she safe for a bottom to play with? for knife play, almost certainly. for full-body bondage and suspension? who the fuck knows?
- The 37-year-old disabled stunt double from Coalinga, CA, begins his scene career by teaching ponyplay. Is he safe to play with? Use your horse sense. (pun accidental but retained with malice) [FYI: Coalinga is close enough to Hollywood to get there in an afternoon, and far enough to ranch horses.]
EVERYONE comes to the scene with and without data, information, knowledge, and wisdom (DIKW) about the scene and its risks and rewards.
Unfortunately, the interest and enthusiasm of a newby is rarely proportionate to the DIKW surrounding a given form of play, let alone combining them.
Including me!
Fortunately, many people bring with them all sorts of useful DIKW about rope, tack, steel, leather, machinery, anatomy, physiology, kinesiology, physics, chemistry…which leaves them able to apply some portions of this DIKW to scenes. But the younger the human, the less DIKW they will have aboard—
and often, the more hormonal insanity without leaven of experience.
So. Define NEW.
What newbies need most is information, followed quickly by knowledge. Data is for the statistically minded. Wisdom is in the lap of the gods.
Delilah Deb
I'm trying to figure out which part of My post you found that disagreed with your point of view. I'm very lost at the introduction of the acronym, or the need of the application.
In the three examples you gave above, I will oblige, and say the answers are a resounding 'no', but I think something was skipped. That would be the common sense factor of those who would chose to play. Would it be your position to suggest that the person on the other end of the kneel in these situations would be as foolish as the examples you site? Good Lord, I hope not!
Just because a person is new, doesn't mean their common sense has, or should be, thrown out the window. No one here is saying that learning a thing or two before participating in activity is a bad idea. I'll grant you that obtaining some information prior is a good planning method, but how would you suggest they go further and get the knowledge? If anyone out there is like Me, they aren't going to get it through osmosis.
In no part of My post, nor in the OP's, if I am remembering right, was it suggested that anyone should go into an activity blindly, without regard for safety or common sense.
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