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Loss of a pet - 10/8/2005 5:09:43 PM

CalliopePurple

Posts: 2539
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: SeaTac area
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My kitten died in my arms today. I don't know what caused it, either.

She was perfectly fine last night. My stepdad was annoyed at the smaller furballs breaking things, so he threw them all outside (some of them literally). We were letting them back in later at night and this morning, but I didn't find Sefie right away.

Found her under one of the porch steps, not wanting to move and kinda cold. I figured that was because it had rained overnight, so I dried her off, tried wrapping her in a warm towel, and offered her food. Most I got was a couple mews. So I just laid there with her on my chest and waited to see what way things would go.

I got a bad feeling when she started mewing and having these weird little spasms every now and then, but I just kept petting her and whispering that it was okay if she had to go. And then she stopped breathing and her heart stopped and I've been a complete mess ever since.

Was watching as she was born and I held her when she died...I can't even look at the cans of cat food we bought mostly for her since she wouldn't eat wet. What the fuck could happen to a healthy 6-month-old kitten overnight to lead to her dying? There were no open wounds, no tender areas where a bone could have been broken...most I thought was odd was that her stomach was hard.

If she hadn't been tossed out last night, she'd be perfectly fine right now, sitting on my shoulder or on top of the monitor....

I didn't need this right now.

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Kimi ni aitakute dare yori mo aitakute
hajimete kimi ni atta hoshizora no shita de.
Kimi ni tsutaetai todokanai omoi demo
boku no kokoro wa mada kimi o sagashiteiru.

Gackt - Kimi ni Aitakute

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RE: Loss of a pet - 10/8/2005 5:20:20 PM

mistoferin

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Joined: 10/27/2004
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I am so sorry for your loss and understand just how you feel. I have been "mommy" to many domestic and wild animal babies. It is heart wrenching when one doesn't make it and I have spent a good many hours crying over a struggling little one.

Hypothermia happens very fast in babies and it is very difficult for them to come back from. To complicate things, it generally triggers a bad case of gastroenteritis, which is the most likely reason for the hard belly.

Again, I am so sorry....and I know that those are only words and that doesn't help much. Hugs.

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~erin~

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"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

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RE: Loss of a pet - 10/8/2005 5:35:38 PM

Rayne58

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Joined: 2/22/2005
From: Sydney Australia
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Sounds like she may have ruptured something inside her, if she was thrown and landed hard. The hardness of the belly to me indicates internal bleeding.

I'm so sorry this happened, I know how hard it is to lose a pet especially one so young. Like mistoferin I have been "mother" to many baby animals. I used to live on a farm and there would be orphan lambs and the occasional calf to rear. So many of them died. I took comfort in that at least they died in a warm box or by a warm fire rather than out in the cold and rain.

I'm sure she knew you loved her. {{{{HUGS}}}}

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RE: Loss of a pet - 10/8/2005 5:50:54 PM

quietkitten

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From: Alberta, Canada
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Oh sweetie I am so sorry for your loss.... my thoughts are with you.

*hug

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RE: Loss of a pet - 10/8/2005 6:06:21 PM

perfection20005

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Joined: 4/20/2005
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I understand exactly what you are going through. I had a boston terrier puppy while I was driving trucks. She rode in the truck with me, and she fell off the bed one time while the truck was moving. She looked fine for a couple of hours and then she just started breathing funny, and I knew she was dying. About an hour later she took her last breath, and she was beside me in the bed. This was 5 years ago, and when I think about it I can see if happening all over again.
You will get through it, just give it some time. Remember that you were comforting her when she died, and she wasn't alone.
My heart goes out to you Calliope.

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RE: Loss of a pet - 10/8/2005 9:46:02 PM

EmeraldSlave2

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My initial guess is that the cat ate something bad.

I'm very sorry for your loss.

Your home situation sounds fairly unstable, and we know your own personal life isn't very much so right now. Hope you're continuing to work on finding stability and security within yourself and your life through all of this.

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RE: Loss of a pet - 10/8/2005 9:57:02 PM

dekley

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Joined: 2/22/2004
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Sorry for your loss. I recommend the following book:

Cold Noses at the Pearly Gates

Click on the title and it will take you to the Amazon link that you can order it from.

Dekley

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RE: Loss of a pet - 10/8/2005 11:15:12 PM

GoddessDustyGold

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From: Arizona
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Oh sweetie, I am so sorry. I know this has to be hard. I worry so about My own little dog who is now 15 and not doing so well.
Perhaps hypothermia, perhaps eating something bad, perhaps internal bleeding. Perhaps a combination of those things. It is hard for animal lovers to relate to those who would throw animals out the house. But, sadly, it happens.
I can only say that I think it was wonderful that you held her and kept her warm and loved.

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They that give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety
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RE: Loss of a pet - 10/9/2005 12:49:30 AM

CalliopePurple

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Joined: 11/29/2004
From: SeaTac area
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Thanks for all the virtual love. The other kittens keep trying to jump on me tonight, it's like they know I need something to respond to my touches and to give me that look that says "I'm adorable, love me". Pets are easier to get along with than people at times.

_____________________________

Kimi ni aitakute dare yori mo aitakute
hajimete kimi ni atta hoshizora no shita de.
Kimi ni tsutaetai todokanai omoi demo
boku no kokoro wa mada kimi o sagashiteiru.

Gackt - Kimi ni Aitakute

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RE: Loss of a pet - 10/10/2005 3:47:17 AM

MadameDahlia

Posts: 2021
Joined: 8/11/2004
From: SoCal aka Hell
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I'm very sorry for your loss.

I grew up with a tenacious, bitchy cat. She and I adored each other. She hated just about everyone else. When she was getting close to nineteen years she started having seizures. She was my diary, one of my most beloved friends. And I didn't want her to go. I wanted to hold on for as long as I could. But I knew that her state of living wasn't one I'd want to subject anyone to. It was possibly the most painful thing I've ever felt... both physically and emotionally. I felt listless and so very hollow. I can still remember having a bad day and coming home, crying into her fur.

It hurts. It'll keep on hurting. Sometimes it'll hurt more than others. But you focus on the love and the affection you shared. And you try to focus on the notion of her being in a better, happier place. Kitten heaven... the next life... somewhere better than where she was when she was in pain.

I hope that you can find comfort in remembering those things.

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