RE: Outsiders (Full Version)

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sirsholly -> RE: Outsiders (4/16/2008 10:25:12 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: popeye1250

Ok, your body's endochronology has gone haywire out of control and you're trying to turn that into a "lifestyle?"
To "defend" it?
Would you do the same thing with Diabetes or Alcoholism?
It's a medical/lifestyle problem.
Not something to be "celebrated."


hey Popeye...you celebrate the gift...not the wrapping paper




popeye1250 -> RE: Outsiders (4/16/2008 11:55:31 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

ORIGINAL: popeye1250

Ok, your body's endochronology has gone haywire out of control and you're trying to turn that into a "lifestyle?"
To "defend" it?
Would you do the same thing with Diabetes or Alcoholism?
It's a medical/lifestyle problem.
Not something to be "celebrated."


hey Popeye...you celebrate the gift...not the wrapping paper



Well, you don't see too many of them in their 60's and 70's "celebrating" do you?
The Grim Reaper works overtime when they're in their 50's.




sirsholly -> RE: Outsiders (4/16/2008 12:39:17 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: popeye1250

quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

ORIGINAL: popeye1250

Ok, your body's endochronology has gone haywire out of control and you're trying to turn that into a "lifestyle?"
To "defend" it?
Would you do the same thing with Diabetes or Alcoholism?
It's a medical/lifestyle problem.
Not something to be "celebrated."


hey Popeye...you celebrate the gift...not the wrapping paper



Well, you don't see too many of them in their 60's and 70's "celebrating" do you?
The Grim Reaper works overtime when they're in their 50's.


Are you really saying that people should not enjoy life because of physical issues...be it age, weight, pregnancy,  polyps, etc?





popeye1250 -> RE: Outsiders (4/16/2008 1:06:02 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

ORIGINAL: popeye1250

quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

ORIGINAL: popeye1250

Ok, your body's endochronology has gone haywire out of control and you're trying to turn that into a "lifestyle?"
To "defend" it?
Would you do the same thing with Diabetes or Alcoholism?
It's a medical/lifestyle problem.
Not something to be "celebrated."


hey Popeye...you celebrate the gift...not the wrapping paper



Well, you don't see too many of them in their 60's and 70's "celebrating" do you?
The Grim Reaper works overtime when they're in their 50's.


Are you really saying that people should not enjoy life because of physical issues...be it age, weight, pregnancy,  polyps, etc?




That's not what I'm saying at all, what sense does that make?
But, my brother who's a Lt. on the Boston Fire Dept told me that once they hit their 50's, "the fat people start dropping like flies."
When they send an ambulance they also send an Engine or Ladder Truck which he is on to a medical aid call and he sees it all the time.
Most times they've been dead for a day or three and are found by family, neighbors or someone reports the smell.
"Cardiac Infarction."
So, I don't think being a "BBW" or "BBM" is any cause for "celebration."




sirsholly -> RE: Outsiders (4/16/2008 1:12:24 PM)

ok...i see what you are saying.

my point though is that none of us jump around saying "WooHoo...i am a diabetic"
or "WooHoo.. i am overweight" or *add your issue here:______*

But  rather "WooHoo...i am HERE!!!"

Life may not be what we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance.




popeye1250 -> RE: Outsiders (4/16/2008 1:20:11 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

ok...i see what you are saying.

my point though is that none of us jump around saying "WooHoo...i am a diabetic"
or "WooHoo.. i am overweight" or *add your issue here:______*

But  rather "WooHoo...i am HERE!!!"

Life may not be what we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance.



True, and I'm not going to be on "here" for a couple of hours because I'm going to go down to the beach and walk 3 or 4 miles.




sirsholly -> RE: Outsiders (4/16/2008 1:24:31 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: popeye1250

quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

ok...i see what you are saying.

my point though is that none of us jump around saying "WooHoo...i am a diabetic"
or "WooHoo.. i am overweight" or *add your issue here:______*

But  rather "WooHoo...i am HERE!!!"

Life may not be what we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance.



True, and I'm not going to be on "here" for a couple of hours because I'm going to go down to the beach and walk 3 or 4 miles.


take a great big inhale of that salty air for me...ok?




spinninsweetness -> RE: Outsiders (4/16/2008 2:06:18 PM)

I personally use the term BBW not because I think I'm beautiful, but because its a term people understand. So I need'nt say I'm huge, or list my size or whatever. Oh wait I do that.

My profile is so damn clear that I'm big that no-one is suprised by it, if it comes up- I'm not lying.

I get some nice emails- dont worry, you look nice! that kind of thing. Or pervy- I'll tie your big tits, or I love wobbly asses!

No nasty ones- yet- well at least not specifically aimed at the 'BBW' issue.

Also to anyone who cares I walk for over 4 hours a day for my job. I also have a wonderful hormone condition which makes losing weight incredibly difficult, hurray for me. And the reason I dont like my body so much is because I have a lil bit of excma, I dont mind my wobbly ass.




OrionTheWolf -> RE: Outsiders (4/16/2008 3:14:30 PM)

Oh the horror. Wrap something in a different word and it is supposed to be more palatable. People can say what they want, just use the block function. If you fully accepted who you are, then why do you feel the need to explain and justify it? Just be you, and stop worrying about those that want to be asshats.




Mystressmynx -> RE: Outsiders (4/16/2008 4:40:25 PM)

So oddly enough, the whole thing that started this particular rant by my beautiful and amazing wife/partner/Domme/sub, was a dorkwad on here who felt the need to insult me on weight issues.  That said, i would not define myself as a BBW, in fact i am a 5'4 girl who has B cup boobies and weighs 160, which honestly, no one would ever know if i did not tell them, as i have a body that is nice enough to hide it well.  The whole invocation of this discussion had to do with this gentleman looking at my profile pic (which happens to be of my ass) and telling me "Well you can't possibly be 160 in that photo", to which i said "No, i was 145" and him telling me "Oh well that explains it", then going on to tell me how fat i was (going as far as to send me an offensive photo of a woman easily 4 times my size and saying i must look like her with that extra 15 pounds) and how i needed to loose weight.

Now, honestly, i didn't have a problem, as i knew this idiot was trying to get a rise out of me.  Ironically, when i had "that hot 145 pound ass" this guy was encouraging me to call him and play with him, but as soon as i was "160" i became this ridiculous behemoth that he felt he needed to insult saying it made him want to barf.  i made the mistake of relaying this conversation to my wife who is a 6 foot tall Goddess of a woman, who at the time was dosed with heavy medications for a recent back injury and dealing herself with some random idiot who had just insulted her based on weight.  The result was this thread that everyone is now reading, which was mainly her attempt at outpouring a reaction to the insulting behaviour of some of the people here on CM.

Having said all of the above, i don't think the point of this thread was to focus so much on the weight issue, but more so a matter of saying "Hey if there is something you don't like about me, don't write me".  It is amazing how many people on here feel the need to write people to tell them what they consider to be their faults.  my feeling is, what is the point in writing someone on here, just to attempt to make them feel bad.  i realize, for some this is just the way they get their jollies, but seriously folks as much as it's great to say "just ignore it", we're all human.  As strong and independent and comfortable with ourselves as we all are/claim to be, it just takes that one straw to push you over the edge. 

I realize what my wife posted was a rant, but truly, isn't that what this discussion board is for?  Nothing is forcing you to read this thread.  Nothing is forcing you to write reacting to this thread.   For those who have come back with more negative comments, you just furthered the point of what is wrong on here.

What's truly interesting that i have found from this thread, is despite the fact that many seem annoyed that the thread exists at all, all of you have taken the time to put in your two cents on the matter.  If this thread served to do nothing else, it definitely got people talking about something, be it right or wrong.

I also want to note, that my wife in no way has anything against women who are skinny.  She was trying to make a point, and she phrased it in a way that came off far more offensive than she was shooting for.  She has made her apology for it, so moving forward, please note that before going off about it. 

M mynx

PS. Before anyone goes thinking that i am writing this because she told me to, or to defend her, please know that she is currently fast asleep and these are solely my own thoughts on this discussion matter.  She is a big girl (no pun intended) and she can fight her own battles, but i thought you all might like some insight on what started this whole thing.




midgetmafiosa -> RE: Outsiders (4/16/2008 4:44:47 PM)

um...when i look around me, 85% of women are not big, and are certainly not beautiful. i'm all for self-esteem at any size, but self-delusion is another matter entirely.




stella41b -> RE: Outsiders (4/16/2008 5:26:36 PM)

You can only be an outsider if you choose to be an outsider.

I'm a 290lb transgendered female, I don't fit in and I don't even bother trying to fit in. Sure like people who don't fit in with the media generated stereotypes of what someone should look like and how someone should live I'm stigmatized by the way I look and the way I live.. but I live my life as myself not to fit some kind of norm or stereotype.

I get it constantly and I mean constantly - it's not every day but it's quite often.. I always ask myself three questions. Do these people know me? No. Are they right in what they think? No. Am I bothered by what they think? No.

I don't fall for the fake concern for someone's health or wellbeing - it's social stigma pure and simple. It's labelling someone for the way they look, the stereotyping - they eat too much, they don't exercise, they're about to drop dead from a heart attack. It's stereotyping them with this 'us' and 'them' way of thinking. It's perceiving them as inferior, excluding them.

Yeah right, and if that doesn't work you can label them as being 'insecure'. This isn't being insecure, but a protest against being stigmatized. Labelling them as 'insecure' is an attempt to stigmatize them through their behaviour. If you want to talk about people being 'insecure' then why don't we start the discussion with the people who feel the need to offer their own unsolicited opinions based on spurious assumptions?

Before anyone starts this isn't being politically correct.. but calling a spade a spade. It's social stigma pure and simple.

It's quite common when society becomes influenced by politics which are either too far to the right or too far to the left. The treatment of Jews in Eastern Europe and Nazi Germany being the obvious example.

The only solution is for the people who are doing the stigmatizing is to stop obsessing over other people, get out more and work towards leading a much more fulfilling life.




OrionTheWolf -> RE: Outsiders (4/17/2008 9:31:33 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mystressmynx

I realize what my wife posted was a rant, but truly, isn't that what this discussion board is for?  Nothing is forcing you to read this thread.  Nothing is forcing you to write reacting to this thread.   For those who have come back with more negative comments, you just furthered the point of what is wrong on here.


What is wrong is negative comments? Seeing people's honest opinion is a negative comment? No it is not. It is them stating their thoughts, which is what a discussion board is for. The OP decided to bring it here, and we all must deal with the consequences of our actions. What I see as a problem, is the inability to accept personal responsibility. If the OP had never been made, then there would never be a chance for comments. If honest opinions are hurtful, then look inside yourself to find out why they are hurtful.

quote:


What's truly interesting that i have found from this thread, is despite the fact that many seem annoyed that the thread exists at all, all of you have taken the time to put in your two cents on the matter.  If this thread served to do nothing else, it definitely got people talking about something, be it right or wrong.



Right and wrong is a judgement made from each of our perspectives. Maybe it gave the OP a thicker skin, that is what I hope it did.




sirsholly -> RE: Outsiders (4/17/2008 11:34:35 AM)

The point i would like to make to both you and your partner is you cannot and will not change the behavior of others. Yes, there will be unkind e-mails and comments no matter what the issue. Some simply feel they must make a negitive comment on every profile they view.
What you can change is your response to the nastiness you come across. I KNOW it is hard not to allow an unkindness to get to you but this is YOUR day...why allow some jerk to screw it up?






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