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chickpea -> RE: Mid life crisis or just a low? Question for those with 10+ yrs exp. (4/22/2008 8:30:20 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: lostsoulskitten
I was going to toss this up to the other Masters and Mistresses first, before tossing the same question to the submissives.
We have browsed something over 6,000+ profiles on collarme, on girls 18-21. There seems to be a interesting rift.
60% want a master/Mistress closer to their age, about 10% want ones of other ethnic background, the other 30 % want ones old enough to be their grandparents.
It seems as soon as I hit the age of 32, I hit some invisible little void that sucked me right in. Girls beg for ones with experience, but as soon as a true real life Top with over 15 years experience messages, them even a simple hello, they delete profile instantly or never bother writing back. A few have, but not many. Usually we get as a couple, oh he's too old, too fat or she is, etc. The lovely ones who are judgemental.
At the same time, if you are nice and respectful to one, they consider it a sign of weakness and the Top does not have the "balls" to train them and be strict. On the other hand there are the ones who rush in without knowing what they are getting into and start chasing the predators and get abused and tortured.
I don't understand it sometimes. Age is only a small factor in the overall picture. I would think most would jump on the experienced trainers and Tops. Experience should be just as important if not more.
Have others seen this huge rift on collarme and other adult sites as well?
I see it too. I think everyone wants a dom that's experienced. But usually the experienced ones are at least 30 years old. Some lower 20 something year olds may not beable to relate to emotionally/mentally with those where there's a huge gap in age. Or at that age, you think that 30 is way old... I know, I did. The only thing you'd want from a much older guy is experience or a lot of money so they can spoil or take care of you. I think BDSM is very emotional and demands a lot of maturity or at least self-knowledge which you just lack at that age just leaving your parents house and start discovering things about the world. So being in that situation with little experience in anything is a huge disadvantage especially since you also have to give of yourself a lot of trust (super duper double disadvantage).. I'd run the other way. A side not, I'm not speaking for everyone, I think it depends on a lot life experience not necessarily age. But generally, life experience correlates with age. So if you've been through a lot in life by the time you're 20, then you'll be less reluctant in approaching Doms of a much older age, etc
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