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fraud and tributes - 4/27/2008 8:26:51 AM   
yournewprincess


Posts: 18
Joined: 11/5/2007
Status: offline 		i have recently been browsing through some of the boards here and it got me thinking about something. there are numerous posts about fakes getting tributes from the few honest ones on here. but why complain? why not learn from your lesson and go to the cops? isnt there a way that you can get your money back?

just so you all know I am one of those dommes that asks for a tribute to weed out the wankers on here however if things didnt work out with the guy i give it back. i have proof lol!!! I am still young (21) so maybe the more i am in this lifestyle i will find a better way to spot the true ones from the fakes but at this point this is how i do it. it got to the point where about 8 of every 10 guys i would set a time to meet would never show up. i know you all have been there and im sure you were feeling as frustrated as i have been.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: fraud and tributes - 4/27/2008 8:35:19 AM   
kiwisub12


Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline 		So - you charge a fee to meet someone. Interesting. Sounds like an escort service.
Probably just as well i am not a male sub , because i just don't "get" the whole male sub paying the female domme to do their thing.  seems to me it should be a mutually enjoyable thing, exclusive of payment.

maybe those 8 men didn't want to pay for what should be a relationship, not a business arrangement.

or am i just feeling pissy right now?

(in reply to yournewprincess)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: fraud and tributes - 4/27/2008 8:37:50 AM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline 		No one forces anyone to pay a pro domme.  If a male sub chooses to pay for sessions then that's his decision.  If he chooses to search for a non-pro domme then thats his choice too.  Supply and demand.

_____________________________



(in reply to kiwisub12)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: fraud and tributes - 4/27/2008 8:41:13 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		It sounds like it's working for the op and if so, good for her. Getting stood up 9 times out of 10 would make anyone annoyed. If demanding a tribute makes them back away before you find yourself sitting there feeling foolish for waiting works, then keep doing it.

I really like the fact that you hand it back to the ones that show. That tells them more than anything you could say that you have strong ethical boundaries both in terms of using and being used.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to Aileen1968)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: fraud and tributes - 4/27/2008 8:42:57 AM   
BoiJen


Posts: 2608
Joined: 3/7/2007
Status: offline 		You're being pissy.

Professional work is not about the relationship bit of D/s. It's about getting my kink met bit of BDSM. These guys are either already engaged in a relationship with someone else or don't want a relationship of their own. Those 8 guys...of all approaching a Pro (assumed) will get told "Hey I'm a Pro. I don't want a relationship." 1 Will say okay that's what I'm looking for so have a good one. The other 7 will try and get one over as to why they are special enough to not get charged. They're cheap asses trying to get out of paying for what they want.

It would be like going to a McD's and saying "Um...can I get that for free because you should like me?"

(in reply to kiwisub12)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: fraud and tributes - 4/27/2008 8:45:27 AM   
yournewprincess


Posts: 18
Joined: 11/5/2007
Status: offline 		never said they have to pay to see me now did i? im not a pro i am a lifestyler. i occassionaly will do pro sessions with friends but very rarely. the tribute is totally optional. and if you read my post correctly i was saying that for every ten people i would go to meet about eight of them would never show up. nervous, fakes, or for whatever reason. there was no money involved at all. it was after that kept happening for a good amount of time that i started asking for a small tribute as a bit of insurance i guess you could say. but like i said its totally optional. i have still met guys without the tribute i just always have that doubt until they prove themselves. i hope this clears up any  misconceptions there were.

(in reply to Aileen1968)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: fraud and tributes - 4/27/2008 8:47:29 AM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline 		I was actually supporting your position and answering kiwi's post which was negative towards yours.  I'm hungover.  Did that make any sense?

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(in reply to yournewprincess)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: fraud and tributes - 4/27/2008 8:52:51 AM   
yournewprincess


Posts: 18
Joined: 11/5/2007
Status: offline 		wasnt replying to your post hun actually the one before you. i wanted to make sure that any misconceptions were taken care of. i dont want to come over as a money hungry domme, just someone trying to get over the large amounts of fakes that are standing in the way of that one special one.

(in reply to Aileen1968)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: fraud and tributes - 4/27/2008 8:55:09 AM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline 		No worries.  I thought you were because that post showed that it was in reply to me.

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Profile   Post #: 9
RE: fraud and tributes - 4/27/2008 8:55:23 AM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		As long as you realize that one special person may bypass you completely because he doesn't have to pay for an escort.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to yournewprincess)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: fraud and tributes - 4/27/2008 9:37:24 AM   
kiwisub12


Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: yournewprincess


just so you all know I am one of those dommes that asks for a tribute to weed out the wankers on here however if things didnt work out with the guy i give it back.

/quote]

actually, you did say they pay for it.   

(in reply to yournewprincess)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: fraud and tributes - 4/27/2008 9:51:15 AM   
khem


Posts: 300
Joined: 8/8/2005
Status: offline 		I get stood up and flaked on frequently also, but I don't think involving money would help one bit.  Has this actually helped you?  I'd think once money becomes involved (as a non-pro) your potentials would be expecting something. 
-MsK

(in reply to kiwisub12)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: fraud and tributes - 4/27/2008 10:20:21 AM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline 		Your mistake is assuming that Pro-dommes don't get flaked on. 

And no, I somehow doubt that you could try to go to the cops to get "your money back" The cops don't tend to look too favorably towards the Pro scene in this area. In THEIR mind, it's the same as a john asking for his money back because the hooker ripped him off.

The best way to weed out wankers, sadly, is just experience. You learn to pick out the key wanker phrases and attitudes. Demands for more pictures, cam sessions, and the "Tell me what you'd do to me" emails are all red flags for greasy little wankers, in my opinion.

(in reply to khem)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: fraud and tributes - 4/27/2008 11:18:40 AM   
deviousmiss


Posts: 9
Joined: 4/10/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

As long as you realize that one special person may bypass you completely because he doesn't have to pay for an escort.


See, for me, this is the rub. I, like OP, want to cut the bullshit and get to who really wants and deserves to be with me. But, what if he just can't afford to bring me a tribute?

I'm sure if I set my mind to it, I could think of something he could give, which could either be inexpensive but thoughtful or could be returned. One idea I had, was to have a sub find my favorite nail polish only by color but not by brand name, and not online. "I'm Not Really a Waitress" is the name.

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: fraud and tributes - 4/27/2008 12:04:12 PM   
yournewprincess


Posts: 18
Joined: 11/5/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: deviousmiss

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

As long as you realize that one special person may bypass you completely because he doesn't have to pay for an escort.


See, for me, this is the rub. I, like OP, want to cut the bullshit and get to who really wants and deserves to be with me. But, what if he just can't afford to bring me a tribute?

I'm sure if I set my mind to it, I could think of something he could give, which could either be inexpensive but thoughtful or could be returned. One idea I had, was to have a sub find my favorite nail polish only by color but not by brand name, and not online. "I'm Not Really a Waitress" is the name.



yes tasks are another way of proving yourself. its really sad that everyone needs to prove themselves in the first place but as we have all found out that it is necessary. i am talking to a slave right now that has offered to build me a queening throne as a tribute. it doesnt always have to be money.

(in reply to deviousmiss)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: fraud and tributes - 4/27/2008 12:35:05 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline
quote:

But, what if he just can't afford to bring me a tribute?


For me it's not even a question of affording it.  To some people it may seem like an affront.  If I am looking for the possibility of a LTR, it's not going to have anything to do with money (as in having to pay for the privilege of meeting someone).  I understand it from a professional exchange of services/money.  Just not sure how it can turn into a relationship sort of thing.  Or anything other than a business exchange.


_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to deviousmiss)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: fraud and tributes - 4/27/2008 12:42:02 PM   
Jasmyn


Posts: 1234
Joined: 2/6/2004
From: New Zealand
Status: offline 		The very bestest, nicest, sweetest guy who now gets to share my bed and my life first met me 10 months ago as a professional client ... he has neither money nor riches ..

_____________________________

quote:

"To learn the art of submission a slave must first give up the desires that drew him to submission in the first place." Mistress Jasmyn Jan 2005.


Visit My Website


(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: fraud and tributes - 4/27/2008 12:52:31 PM   
Usako


Posts: 697
Joined: 7/29/2006
From: NYC
Status: offline 		Exchanging money, gifts or services JUST to meet you? I love how fancy words like "tribute" are used when in any real world situation people would just used the word "prostitution."

FYI, you're ALWAYS going to get flaked on. "Tributes" or not. Just because this is a "BDSM lifestyle" doesn't change the fact that people will/can/do flake out on meetings. It happens ALL the time everywhere else in life, this part is no different.

(in reply to Jasmyn)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: fraud and tributes - 4/27/2008 12:56:42 PM   
yournewprincess


Posts: 18
Joined: 11/5/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Usako

Exchanging money, gifts or services JUST to meet you? I love how fancy words like "tribute" are used when in any real world situation people would just used the word "prostitution."

FYI, you're ALWAYS going to get flaked on. "Tributes" or not. Just because this is a "BDSM lifestyle" doesn't change the fact that people will/can/do flake out on meetings. It happens ALL the time everywhere else in life, this part is no different.



i have said before the tribute is not required to meet me. it helps show that you are sincere but it is not necessary. prositution is money for sex, i have never had sex with a slave of mine. and tribute doesnt always have to be money either. please read the whole thread before posting otherwise you come across as looking like you cant read and comprehend. thank you!!!

(in reply to Usako)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: fraud and tributes - 4/27/2008 12:59:28 PM   
Usako


Posts: 697
Joined: 7/29/2006
From: NYC
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: yournewprincess

quote:

ORIGINAL: Usako

Exchanging money, gifts or services JUST to meet you? I love how fancy words like "tribute" are used when in any real world situation people would just used the word "prostitution."

FYI, you're ALWAYS going to get flaked on. "Tributes" or not. Just because this is a "BDSM lifestyle" doesn't change the fact that people will/can/do flake out on meetings. It happens ALL the time everywhere else in life, this part is no different.



i have said before the tribute is not required to meet me. it helps show that you are sincere but it is not necessary. prositution is money for sex, i have never had sex with a slave of mine. and tribute doesnt always have to be money either. please read the whole thread before posting otherwise you come across as looking like you cant read and comprehend. thank you!!!



I never said it was just money, perhaps you are the one who should learn to read/comprehend before reply. :)

And I read the whole thread; ie you whining because guys ditch you and how you take their money or services and whatever BS nonsense. I also read all the amusing posts of people calling you an escort.

(in reply to yournewprincess)
Profile   Post #: 20
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