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RE: Life is not a hamburger. - 4/30/2008 6:24:27 AM

OmegaG

Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

It's not a BDSM thing. It's a life thing. People fall in and out of relationships, have sex, rush into shit. You could go down the local pub and bump into someones ex. It's not a 'community or lifestyle' thang, it's life.
People have grown used to wanting and getting it now. Commercialism and consumerism doesn't stop at the latest TV or fast food establishment.

the.dark.

I agree, there is a person in my life who, since I've been with m'Lord has been in "love" with three different men, said as much and was imagining a future with each of them. Hell, even though I know I love m'Lord, I can't seem to spit out the words. This person in as vanilla as can be and she hangs with people who have been married 4 to 6 times (and they are in their early 40s).

It's not a BDSM thing, its a cultural conditioning that causes people to feel they are defective without someone to love them and a low self-esteem that causes them to take whatever presents itself to them.

_____________________________

Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

(in reply to RCdc)

Post #: 21

RE: Life is not a hamburger. - 4/30/2008 6:29:10 AM

toservez

Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

It's not a BDSM thing. It's a life thing. People fall in and out of relationships, have sex, rush into shit. You could go down the local pub and bump into someones ex. It's not a 'community or lifestyle' thang, it's life.
People have grown used to wanting and getting it now. Commercialism and consumerism doesn't stop at the latest TV or fast food establishment.

the.dark.

I totally agree with this as this is just a reflection of people in life and not about people in this life in general.

Also just like life in general it is often easier and more noticeable to see the “what the heck” situations and ignore all the people and their relationships that are successful and do not hit our radar.

_____________________________

I am sorry I do not fit Webster's defintion of a slave but thankfully my Master is not Webster.

"Anything that contradicts experience and logic should be abandoned." - H.H. The 14th Dalai Lama

(in reply to RCdc)

Post #: 22

RE: Life is not a hamburger. - 4/30/2008 6:29:10 AM

SimplyMichael

Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

~Fast Reply~

People fall in lust as well as love. Sometimes it's lust for a particular type of relationship that you thought you would never be able to achieve and only later realize that this isn't the person for you. Sometimes people think that they are ok with things they later realize they aren't. Sometimes people really want to be ok with something that they just aren't.

It's hard to take things slow when emotions are high and everything feels so good. I suspect things have always been this way, but people were somewhat more held back by social conventations (the shunning of those who left their partners) and lack of birth control. My private theory anyway.

What she said. I also think that we become teenagers again as we explore an unfamiliar dynamic, everything is new and exciting, we don't yet have perspective, and our judgement is not yet shaped by experience. I know for me, I blew through lots and lots and lots of women when I first started. Oh, and ever hear of Romeo and Juliet? Drama and fucked up relationships are nothing new.

(in reply to AquaticSub)

Post #: 23

RE: Life is not a hamburger. - 4/30/2008 6:34:12 AM

faerytattoodgirl

Posts: 5824
Status: offline

life is not a hamburger....but...it IS...A...

DOUBLE BACONATOR WITH CHEESE!!!!!!

_____________________________

I did not reply to your cmail.

I am flawed.

Imperfect.

MUST SPANK!!!

SPAAAAAAAANK!!!

(in reply to flowered)

Post #: 24

RE: Life is not a hamburger. - 4/30/2008 6:53:51 AM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

quote:

Why do you think people are so hasty and heedless in this arena?

They don't know themselves let alone what they want.

They misrepresent (LIE) about themselves to attract a partner. From that foundation they can never trust that the partner likes/wants them or the lie. Maintaining the lie takes effort and work - people ultimately try to avoid work.

Meanwhile - they have an 'itch' that needs scratching; and have no problem using facilitating, and disposable, back scratchers.

(in reply to Leatherist)

Post #: 25

RE: Life is not a hamburger. - 4/30/2008 7:07:45 AM

BlackPhx

Posts: 3432
Joined: 11/8/2006
Status: offline

Coming together to scratch a mutual itch is fine. Hard not to get attached to someone giving you what you need at least for a while, but that does not make a relationship any more than visiting one garage because the mechanic is good makes a permanent emotional relationship.

A lot of people who fall in and out of the collared state (top and bottom) are still seeking what works for them sexually, and finding that (at least briefly) forget that it takes more than sexual compatibility to make a relationship work. Most of the aspects of our lives we have spent a lifetime exploring, even certain parts of our sexual identity shows up and is explored early in childhood, but this aspect while it may draw our interest early is no so deeeply explored until we discover others who are just as involved with that need leading to a kid in the candy store excitement.

Relationships take work, hard work, and the initial attraction may not be enough to sustain an interest in doing that work. It took me over 16 years to find my Master, but that didn't stop me from finding a few good mechanics in the mean time, they weren't looking for more than that and I didn't want more than that from them.

Meanwhile in all walks of life, people are looking for and expecting instant relationships..Check out Speed Dating sometime, or Divorce Court (shortest marriage I believe was 5 days so far, they knew each other 3 days). I am waiting for the book Relationship Helper 20 minutes to a perfect relationship, to come out.

poenkitten

(in reply to Leatherist)

Post #: 26

RE: Life is not a hamburger. - 4/30/2008 10:17:32 AM

dawntreader

Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

Life is not a hamburger.

But if it was....i would want it raw

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to Leatherist)

Post #: 27

RE: Life is not a hamburger. - 4/30/2008 11:27:58 AM

ExSteelAgain

Posts: 1803
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Georgia
Status: offline

Maybe it’s a little of both. People become overwhelmed by a person of the opposite sex paying attention to them, plus the attraction of BDSM can grab you like a cop you told to kiss your ass. Starting to play around as a submissive let’s you justify lots of things in your mind, but having a wild time in Vegas is no different. You simply believe you are allowed to act differently there and it doesn’t matter if it stays in Vegas. Truth is… it's up to you to fill in the ending if it's important or not.

_____________________________

You can paint a cinder block bright pastel pink, but it's still a cinder block. (By Me.)

(in reply to dawntreader)

Post #: 28

RE: Life is not a hamburger. - 4/30/2008 11:36:48 AM

xxblushesxx

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

Well...I like my hamburgers with pickles and onions.

I prefer whipped cream on my Dom...

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com

(in reply to flowered)

Post #: 29

RE: Life is not a hamburger. - 4/30/2008 12:16:23 PM

azropedntied

Posts: 1829
Joined: 7/25/2005
From: Phx AZ
Status: offline

i have seen what your speaking of .Its like velcro collars went on sale buy 5 get 5 free .This being a relativity small as a whole community you do tend to see these trends .But the rest of the world also has those Ex's floating about too .
We are a fast food , drive thru ,i want it now visa ,master card american express card member , buy at costco in bulk for the apocalypse ,drive single in the car pool lane in a H2 , lemmie cut you off cuz i am and should be first world .Its so rare to hear children today say the simple please and thank you or may i , its more like i want or gimmie that or get me that .Maybe it has become the varuca sault syndrom I want it NOWWWWWWWW .Daddy i want a Goose that lays the golden egg Now .

< Message edited by azropedntied -- 4/30/2008 12:17:52 PM >

(in reply to xxblushesxx)

Post #: 30

RE: Life is not a hamburger. - 4/30/2008 12:18:05 PM

lusciouslips19

Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

At the risk of hijacking...
Seriously funny.... AngryBunnies

the.dark.

Thanks for the link! What a hoot!

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to RCdc)

Post #: 31

RE: Life is not a hamburger. - 4/30/2008 12:24:09 PM

subtee

Posts: 5133
Joined: 7/26/2007
Status: offline

~FR

"Hello? Hello? Okay, I'd like a Double flogging with bondage, and I'd like extra spanks on the bottom bun, but hold the labia clamps, please. And make sure because last time there were labia clamps. Also, I'd like a side of biggie paddling, extra thuddy...Oh, and then a medium-hot order of wax play with some ice play tossed in. Are you there? I have a coupon for a free whipping can I use that now?

What's that? No, thanks, I don't need the ball gag, but you know what? I think I will take a blindfold, thanks."

It's got possibilities...

_____________________________

Don't believe everything you think...

(in reply to xxblushesxx)

Post #: 32

RE: Life is not a hamburger. - 4/30/2008 12:26:03 PM

lusciouslips19

Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: azropedntied

i have seen what your speaking of .Its like velcro collars went on sale buy 5 get 5 free .This being a relativity small as a whole community you do tend to see these trends .But the rest of the world also has those Ex's floating about too .
We are a fast food , drive thru ,i want it now visa ,master card american express card member , buy at costco in bulk for the apocalypse ,drive single in the car pool lane in a H2 , lemmie cut you off cuz i am and should be first world .Its so rare to hear children today say the simple please and thank you or may i , its more like i want or gimmie that or get me that .Maybe it has become the varuca sault syndrom I want it NOWWWWWWWW .Daddy i want a Goose that lays the golden egg Now .

Dear Collar me peoples,

I am a new sub and I am madly In L-O-V-E!!! Seriously!!!! I just joined Collar me, like I don't know, yesterday. I am under consideration of a twue Master . Hes says he is from the Old Guard. So when he says jump, I say, "how high your great Highness'. But he says I can only prove my true submissiveness by humping a dog. I really don't want to but I want to prove I am true sub. Is there anything I can do to prove my worth to him? He says I can help buy his mother an artificial leg by sending him one weeks pay, but I would have to go hungry for a week. Maybe I should do this alternative choice? What do you great peoples think. Thank you for helping, I know I am scum on the ground.

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to azropedntied)

Post #: 33

RE: Life is not a hamburger. - 4/30/2008 1:18:04 PM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

Oh lushy you are making me laffffff!!! Because I got this email from a gal who said some broad* wanted her to hump a PONY! And I said to her Be careful ponies are mean critters with sharp hooves and teeth on the top AND bottom, you are risking serious bites and broken ribs. Wrong response? lolol

ANYWAY! There is a local sweetie who I swear has a revolving door on his heart. I literally do not bother to remember the names of his women because they change so rapidly. Last month I told him right out that he had to work harder on KEEPING the women, since getting them was obviously not an issue....

I want a double baconator with cheese, and a Faery with whipped cream on top! But she won't move!!

*yeah, I said BROAD. Because I can, heeee! Francine, Dominant Chick.

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]

(in reply to lusciouslips19)

Post #: 34

RE: Life is not a hamburger. - 4/30/2008 1:22:24 PM

azropedntied

Posts: 1829
Joined: 7/25/2005
From: Phx AZ
Status: offline

(in reply to lusciouslips19)

Post #: 35

RE: Life is not a hamburger. - 4/30/2008 1:25:20 PM

azropedntied

Posts: 1829
Joined: 7/25/2005
From: Phx AZ
Status: offline

Whinnnies ..Ponies can be dangerous animals in needs of corrective training ..

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscu

I got this email from a gal who said some broad* wanted her to hump a PONY! And I said to her Be careful ponies are mean critters with sharp hooves and teeth on the top AND bottom, you are risking serious bites and broken ribs. Wrong response?

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)

Post #: 36

RE: Life is not a hamburger. - 4/30/2008 1:27:31 PM

Aileen1968

Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

We see it time and again. The rush to sex and collars, the drama of hooking up and breaking up. And it usually doesn't take too long. It's like fast food.

I've seen it in local real life communities too-gets so they can't go anywhere without running across an ex. Why do you think people are so hasty and heedless in this arena?

Because it's a lot more intense than going out for dinner and a movie. It's almost like an addiction...that rush of emotions and physical cravings.

_____________________________

(in reply to Leatherist)

Post #: 37

RE: Life is not a hamburger. - 4/30/2008 1:34:30 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

Same reason people eat fast food instead of waiting to go and cook something slow and thoughtful. They can't see past the need. They're lonely and want someone to fill the loneliness. It takes a lot of maturity and strength to deal with the pain in order to start making good choices instead of bad.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to flowered)

Post #: 38

RE: Life is not a hamburger. - 4/30/2008 1:36:00 PM

MasterGrim

Posts: 45
Joined: 8/20/2004
Status: offline

I would gladly pay you tuesday for a hamburger today

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 39

RE: Life is not a hamburger. - 4/30/2008 1:47:47 PM

corsetgirl

Posts: 824
Joined: 5/22/2004
Status: offline

I used to be in the fast food revolving door of BDSM but only with play partners and never had the benefit of getting a collar. I have to agree with everybody, it has to be the rush, excitement and fear of loneliness. Maybe it is the alignment of the full moon? This resulted in short-term gratification which is something I don't want at this time.

I am on my own and for once it is not that bad as I would want to be with someone who is compatible for me. The wait is definitely worth it, though.

< Message edited by corsetgirl -- 4/30/2008 1:49:03 PM >

(in reply to MasterGrim)

Post #: 40

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