Ialdabaoth
Posts: 1073
Joined: 5/4/2008
From: Tempe, AZ
Status: offline
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I'm Ialdabaoth; 30-something dom from AZ. Just got out of a 7-year poly 24/7 relationship, and not by choice. I'm probably a little fucked in the head right now.
I do interesting things. I train girls in contortion and ballet boots. My ex Cera was able to walk, run and dance for 8 hours at a time in them, something I am incredibly proud of. I make fetish costumes. I do suspension bondage, both with rope and straps. I'm apparently a reasonably good fetish artist (line art, colorized in Photoshop). I also train 'humans' into 'persons', although this is an involved and time-consuming process, and fraught with peril. I do wickedly devious predicament bondage set-ups, mind games, and extended deprivation/torture scenes.
I've loved butterflies with a deep and abiding passion since I was seven years old. I can talk for hours about them. If I see a butterfly, I can tell you all about it - and if I can't, I guarantee you I will stop whatever I am doing and spend the next 15 minutes chasing it so I can capture it as gently as possible, examine it, and then look it up when I get home. I love math, and philosophy. I'm "always on" - you cannot escape a philosophical discussion with me; if you are in my presence, I will turn every possible conversation or observation into a Search for Meaning. It's my version of small talk.
I write computer software. I used to love writing video games, but 10 years of writing software for companies has burned out any joy I will ever experience in the process. I solve math problems for fun. I'm socially intense, an impressive speech-giver, and have been often described as an amazing tutor/instructor - both because I make things incredibly easy to understand, and because I can speak on any imaginable topic with extreme passion and enthusiasm.
I also have a deep and abiding self-loathing. I'm utterly convinced that I'm unworthy to even draw breath, and that plenty more 'deserving' people should probably be given my organs, to make better use of them. I have occasional bouts of violent, suicidal depression. I hate myself with a deep and terrifying passion, even though I see no reason to hate myself. It's simply because I was too weak to protect myself once, and I was taught that the weak deserve what they get. I always try to protect the weak, but I still haven't learned to extend that compassion to myself.
I love you all, even if I haven't met you all. Still, I will piss you off. I don't mean to, and I'm sorry. But I do go on a bit.
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So, right. Hello. - 
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