Masters can't nurture? (Full Version)

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gypsygrl -> Masters can't nurture? (5/7/2008 4:50:57 PM)

I've recently become aware of a perspective on M/s that says that Masters don't nurture.  Ever.  This strikes me as counter intuitive, but I'd like to hear a range of thoughts on the matter.

Are Mastery and nurturance mutually exclusive categories?
Does a Master lose his or her mastercard if he gets caught nurturing his or her slave?



angelikaJ -> RE: Masters can't nurture? (5/7/2008 5:03:19 PM)

That is a strange yet interesting perspective.

And yet I think some people actually believe that to be the hard edged truth.


However as someone who has been "mastered" and nurtured, I know that both are possible and it is my belief that the best Masters do both.




RedMagic1 -> RE: Masters can't nurture? (5/7/2008 5:04:27 PM)

I think a lot of nurturing goes on... here on earth.[;)]



OldBastardly1 -> RE: Masters can't nurture? (5/7/2008 5:06:17 PM)

[sm=applause.gif]

Great topic. I look forward to watching this thread develop.

( The "mastercard" thing was very good. )



variation30 -> RE: Masters can't nurture? (5/7/2008 5:08:05 PM)

I'm not certain that this counts, however...

I do feel some tenderness towards people I sleep with or play with on a somewhat regular basis. I, for whatever reason, assume more responsiblity in their well-being. that is to say that I feel like I have more of an obligation to bring them back around when they are emotionally exhausted. I don't know if I would refer to myself (or if anyone else would refer to myself) as nurturing - as most of the time I will not go out of my way to fix a casual date's problems...only to mop up what I've done.

if I hada pretty little slave who meant something to me, though - I would take more care of her than I do casual acquaintances.



BossyShoeBitch -> RE: Masters can't nurture? (5/7/2008 5:08:37 PM)

Shhh.. then don't tell the powers that be about Michael.. They will take away his "Master" card..
He strokes my hair, cooks for me, rubs my bottom to put me to sleep (although that doesn't exactly make me "sleepy" lol), reads to me...Makes me feel safer and more nurtured than I ever have in my life...




Constrictor1 -> RE: Masters can't nurture? (5/7/2008 5:21:59 PM)

Yes they can!

Constrictor1



kinkypuppy2 -> RE: Masters can't nurture? (5/7/2008 5:44:42 PM)

I strongly disagree a good Master is a very nurturing person.. also a tad demanding..



Interesdom -> RE: Masters can't nurture? (5/7/2008 6:25:36 PM)

Let's have a look at some analogies of this idea that Masters never (even must not) nuture their property:
  • A dog owner must not nurture their dog;
  • A farmer doesn't nurture his cattle;
  • A carpenter won't take care of his tools;
None of those statements make sense to me.

Of course, there is fantasy literature about the totally abused and worthless slave but in reality a person who is completely abused and treated as worthless will soon be dead (e.g. Nazi concentration camp labourers).

A consensual slave hands over autonomy to their Master and therefore must rely on them for a certain degree of care.  Any Master who doesn't take that responsibility of care will not be an owner for long, one way or another.



SteelofUtah -> RE: Masters can't nurture? (5/7/2008 6:28:42 PM)

Pez and Rolo's

Definantly Pez and Rolo's

Steel



slaveluci -> RE: Masters can't nurture? (5/7/2008 6:44:15 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: gypsygrl
Are Mastery and nurturance mutually exclusive categories?

No. 
quote:

Does a Master lose his or her mastercard if he gets caught nurturing his or her slave?

Probably some would like to revoke it.  Fortunately, they didn't give it in the first place so they can't revoke it.  Master scoffs at the thought that "masters" HAVE TO be, do, say, etc. according to some great master "manual."  He wrote His own manual.  He follows His own rules.  He masters His own slave any way He finds pleasing.  Screw others' rules about how nurturing He's allowed to be or anything else for that matter.  Allowing others to dictate how He masters His slave would be the exact opposite of being "masterly" in His book................luci



Leatherist -> RE: Masters can't nurture? (5/7/2008 6:50:06 PM)

Anyone who wants to can do it.
 
Just not neccesarily WELL.
 
 



LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Masters can't nurture? (5/7/2008 6:51:55 PM)

It's all from the same family of thought as "masters can't love their slave" "masters can't be naked" "masters can't be polite or gentlemanly" and "masters can't need their slave."

It's all BS.



lronitulstahp -> RE: Masters can't nurture? (5/7/2008 7:09:23 PM)

       i think a Master/Mistress should be able to do, or be anything They want with Their sub/slave.  That is part of power exchange.  For me, it would seem a natural thing to have a nurturing feeling towards the one who gives themselves completely in such a manner. 
     Part of the responsibilty of being in charge is to make sure the one(s) in Your control feel safe in the knowledge that they are able to relinquish control to One who will protect(nurture) them...particularly in an emotional sense.  This doesn't always mean LOVE, or a life of ease, free from pain, or being pushed outside of comfort zones, or being degraded and humiliated...but the feeling of safety can still flourish in some of the seemingly "sickest" [;)]dynamics...  In fact, when i have been pushed to points from which i nearly questioned whether there could be any coming back...that's where i've been reassured of how much nurturing my Masterful type was capable.
~nostalgic slut[&o]



OmegaG -> RE: Masters can't nurture? (5/7/2008 7:22:19 PM)

And here I think that if a Master follows some pre-determined set of critera rather then his own will would make him more subservient to rules then a Master.



antipode -> RE: Masters can't nurture? (5/7/2008 8:59:37 PM)

Yes, and I suppose subbies don't generalize. You've become aware of a perspective? Sounds like you bought the wrong church subscription.



girlserveshim -> RE: Masters can't nurture? (5/7/2008 9:21:55 PM)

 
My Master nurtures me, loves me and uses me hard. I didn't expect it at first, and it confused me. But I never could have given him the level of trust and devotion I do without knowing the depth of His love for me. I would have remained a 'submissive' and never found my slaveheart.



Archer -> RE: Masters can't nurture? (5/7/2008 9:22:38 PM)

The idea that a Master can't be nurturing certainly runs counter to what I see as Mastery (?).

The thing is it boils down to how one views their responsibility that comes with ownership. I really like to use the word stewardship when I talk about these responsibilities.
I genrally don't spend much time around those who have the view of not being able to be nurturing as a Master.
Of course then there is the question of how this person (people) are using the word nurturing, is it with a subtext of coddeling? If the subtext is coddling then I could see the worry about the effect it would have on the dynamic.




Asherdelampyr -> RE: Masters can't nurture? (5/7/2008 9:23:41 PM)

nurturing is a  large part of being a good Dom imo



SimplyMichael -> RE: Masters can't nurture? (5/7/2008 10:33:50 PM)

To nobody in particular...

I do whatever the fuck I WANT to do...THAT is what makes ME Master.  I would be dominant if I were wearing a dress and cleaning a toilet because I would clean it MY way and if I wanted someone else to clean it, they would clean it EXACTLY the same way I did because that is MY way.

If the only way people can tell you are dominant is because you capitalize your name, hang a flogger from your belt, or you wear some other symbol, then you will be very puzzled when someone with charisma enters a room without a flogger or any other outward sign of being dominant and yet effortlessly gets all the respect you crave but never feel.



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