RE: Is he the right Master for me?

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RE: Is he the right Master for me? - 5/9/2008 8:34:12 AM

kinkypuppy2

Posts: 345
Joined: 11/4/2007
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"Normal" is a state that occurs over time. Sounds to me that you are not "Kinky" but did it to please them and its just not right for you.

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See nic "Kinkypupper" also as "slvseeker" As I cannot reply to any posts or log into collarchat under that name I had to create this profile.

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RE: Is he the right Master for me? - 5/9/2008 9:17:40 AM

Dnomyar

Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline

Daddys/ don'nt drink coffee so I will just settle for the quickie. Op just how quick did you jump into this. Sounds like there was'nt much talking before hand.

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RE: Is he the right Master for me? - 5/9/2008 9:36:03 AM

FRSguy

Posts: 653
Joined: 9/4/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: crimsonvampyrss

I have very little experiance in this new world I find myself in. I recently got a Master and Ive had two scenes with him. Im getting into this well but I find myself needing Vanila. Is this normal for a submissive to want in the begining? And also my Master has changed slightly now that I'm his. Everything we talk about is lifestyle and there is no "normal" conversation, I feel in need of some normaility and find myself confused by his answers and his constant switches back to BDSM related things. Is he blatantly ignoring my need for normality, or is he simply being the natural dominat that he is and trying to help mold me more.

I realise the second question might not be so simple to answer

You know, maybe, your just a really good fuck and he hasnt had it in a while. Let him play with his chew toy for a while before you go all half cocked on him. Talk to him about your concerns. Give him time to become a little more bored first. Until then why not enjoy being a good little chew toy for a while... its only two scenes and his dick is barely wet.

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RE: Is he the right Master for me? - 5/9/2008 9:35:11 PM

SirJohnMandevill

Posts: 546
Joined: 11/10/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: crimsonvampyrss

I have very little experiance in this new world I find myself in. I recently got a Master and Ive had two scenes with him. Im getting into this well but I find myself needing Vanila. Is this normal for a submissive to want in the begining? And also my Master has changed slightly now that I'm his. Everything we talk about is lifestyle and there is no "normal" conversation, I feel in need of some normaility and find myself confused by his answers and his constant switches back to BDSM related things. Is he blatantly ignoring my need for normality, or is he simply being the natural dominat that he is and trying to help mold me more.

I realise the second question might not be so simple to answer

My .02 zlotys: D/s relationships are like vanilla relationships in one important way. If you have to ask "is He/She the right one for me?" you've kind of already answered the question. You just have to decide what to do with that knowledge.

Les (Purveyor of Fine, Handcrafted Kink)

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Iam an eroticist
I am a fully eroticized being
No more neuroses
I found my strip naked soul soup
With the deviant ingredient
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Post #: 24

RE: Is he the right Master for me? - 5/10/2008 3:22:29 AM

Focus50

Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50
You've been duped by a user - he's taking advantage of your inexperience and keeping you as his personal D/s outlet.

A submissive's place is to serve and obey etc and, sadly, that's ALL he wants with you. He doesn't care if you have a favourite movie, colour, hobby or family life etc; it only matters that you do whatever he wants, when he wants it.... Now that's ok if he's honest about it and you stick around anyway - but I suspect no-one asked or informed you, ay?

I think you want a D/s relationship that has room for all you are and a dom who appreciates that about you. What you have is a dom who uses you for his D/s distractions and doubtless has someone else to go back to for the everyday needs you crave but which he doesn't require from you.

He's a selfish, deceitful, bum - question: Is he the right Master for *YOU*?

Well now, that's quite a big leap there don't you think?

It's just my opinion - as always.

You know for a fact that I'm wrong?

Focus.

Do you know for a fact that you're right?

Perhaps your definition of "opinion" is different to mine...?

quote:

I think that it's a pretty heavy accusation based on paragraph of information.

That can happen when a sub specifically comes to a male Dominant's Forum to pose her question. Soooo, you're surprised that your fem/sub rationale is inherently different to my male/doms? Maybe the OP should've asked in the sub/slave Forum - where I likely wouldn't be so "heavy"? Would that satisfy you?

Focus.

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Never underestimate the persuasive power of stupid people in large groups. <unknown>

Your food is for eating, not torturing. <my mum> (Errm, when I was a kid)

(in reply to mistoferin)

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RE: Is he the right Master for me? - 5/10/2008 3:34:10 AM

RavenMuse

Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
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Gotta agree with Focus there. If someone wants to be mollycoddled this is probably the wrong forum to seek it. Ask a question here and you are likely to get a straight, BLUNT answer. Since when have Doms/Masters been reknowned for being less than forthcoming with their opinion?

If folks don't want a straight answer they shouldn't ask the question.

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This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

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(in reply to Focus50)

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Post #: 26

RE: Is he the right Master for me? - 5/10/2008 6:31:34 AM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
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Bullshit, I don't mollycoddle anyone and there are many other subs that don't do it here either. I don't see this particular forum as being any "tougher" on anyone. Focus' answer wasn't a blunt, straightforward answer....it was an assumption that was based in his own head for I surely didn't see any concrete information given by the OP to base it on. Give me a fricking break.....

quote:

Focus50

quote:

: mistoferin

I think that it's a pretty heavy accusation based on paragraph of information.

That can happen when a sub specifically comes to a male Dominant's Forum to pose her question. Soooo, you're surprised that your fem/sub rationale is inherently different to my male/doms? Maybe the OP should've asked in the sub/slave Forum - where I likely wouldn't be so "heavy"? Would that satisfy you?

You appear to be saying that your answer may change depending upon the CollarMe board it is posted on and that when asking questions on the "male Dominant" board we can expect that the answers will be blunt. We should also expect the possibility of accusations being slung around and conclusions beyond leapt to...based upon little information....because that is the difference in the fem/sub vs. male/Dom rationale?

I'm amazed quite frankly. I never realized that dominants were so clairvoyant.

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RE: Is he the right Master for me? - 5/10/2008 7:29:34 AM

Focus50

Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

Bullshit, I don't mollycoddle anyone and there are many other subs that don't do it here either. I don't see this particular forum as being any "tougher" on anyone. Focus' answer wasn't a blunt, straightforward answer....it was an assumption that was based in his own head for I surely didn't see any concrete information given by the OP to base it on. Give me a fricking break.....

My assumptions, like my opinions, are frequently formulated in my own head and it's irrelevant to me (and the OP) that you disagree. Again, you *know* for a fact that I'm wrong?

quote:

quote:

Focus50

quote:

: mistoferin

I think that it's a pretty heavy accusation based on paragraph of information.

That can happen when a sub specifically comes to a male Dominant's Forum to pose her question. Soooo, you're surprised that your fem/sub rationale is inherently different to my male/doms? Maybe the OP should've asked in the sub/slave Forum - where I likely wouldn't be so "heavy"? Would that satisfy you?

You appear to be saying that your answer may change depending upon the CollarMe board it is posted on and that when asking questions on the "male Dominant" board we can expect that the answers will be blunt.

I'm saying that I'm conscious of which Forum I post in - yes. I predominantly post here (Ask a Master) and I naturally assume those asking questions here are specifically seeking the input of the male Dominant mindset. We all know the 'Men are from Mars..." bizzo - there's truth in what is implied, just as there is truth in Yin & Yang. Is it such a reach that the same might apply with Dom/sub rationale?

To answer your question, my opinion wouldn't change but how I express it probably wouldn't be so "heavy" in the "Ask a Sub/Slave" Forum - probably. I can't think or reason like a female or a submissive so I tread a little lighter with those specifically seeking sub/slave input. But when it's asked in "Ask a Master", I get to be just plain ole me and say it as I see it. Doubtless you think my standards quaint or whatever.... Ummmm....., k; that's cool, too.

quote:

We should also expect the possibility of accusations being slung around and conclusions beyond leapt to...based upon little information....because that is the difference in the fem/sub vs. male/Dom rationale?

I'm amazed quite frankly. I never realized that dominants were so clairvoyant.

Well this is entirely *your* opinion and, other than I don't share it and that one of us is at least entitled to her opinion, I can't comment further.

Focus.

_____________________________

Never underestimate the persuasive power of stupid people in large groups. <unknown>

Your food is for eating, not torturing. <my mum> (Errm, when I was a kid)

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RE: Is he the right Master for me? - 5/10/2008 7:36:34 AM

corsetgirl

Posts: 824
Joined: 5/22/2004
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CS:

I just have to say that I love your 30 discrepancies vs. realities of BDSM!!!

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RE: Is he the right Master for me? - 5/11/2008 2:03:30 PM

BikerDomRealTime

Posts: 86
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: crimsonvampyrss

I have very little experiance in this new world I find myself in. I recently got a Master and Ive had two scenes with him. Im getting into this well but I find myself needing Vanila. Is this normal for a submissive to want in the begining? And also my Master has changed slightly now that I'm his. Everything we talk about is lifestyle and there is no "normal" conversation, I feel in need of some normaility and find myself confused by his answers and his constant switches back to BDSM related things. Is he blatantly ignoring my need for normality, or is he simply being the natural dominat that he is and trying to help mold me more.

I realise the second question might not be so simple to answer

Only you can answer the question if he is the right Master for you. Any relationship should be fullfilling and satisfy everybody's needs and desires. If you are not satisfied or fullfilled then you need to discuss it with him if you have not. Everyone is different in what they are seeking. He just may not have an interest in developing a vanilla relationship and only wants a D/s or M/s one. Only he can answer if he is blatantly ignoring your need for normality. But remember, there is no such thing as normal. What is considered normal for one may be abnormal for another.

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RE: Is he the right Master for me? - 5/11/2008 2:46:00 PM

mypain56

Posts: 84
Joined: 11/5/2007
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Hum, hard question for you, and not easily answered. But since your asking for opinions here's my two-cents worth. Obviously He is not experienced or just a player taking up your time. if you are in fact new too the lifestyle then getting into a 24/7 relationship is not wise simply because you can't embrace the dynamics of a D/s relationship as yet. You must learn,study,grow within your journey. OP you didn't state how long you've been in this lifestyle but i am assuming that it's not as long as some on here. As much as i study and read and research this lifestyle i still have many questions that need answers and every time i ask my Daddy/Master he'll just say look it up and write an essay.( by the way some say essay's are busy work) but they are not that's what the information is there for to learn and gain knowledge if not for the relationship but most of all for yourself.. Be well and Good luck with your journey...

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RE: Is he the right Master for me? - 5/11/2008 3:22:36 PM

kiwisub12

Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

I helped BSB plant her first garden, tomatoes, basil, thyme, and green onions. Is that vanilla enough?

This is soooooo sweet. Actually, it really is.

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Post #: 32

RE: Is he the right Master for me? - 5/11/2008 4:26:52 PM

RealSub58

Posts: 1073
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50
You've been duped by a user - he's taking advantage of your inexperience and keeping you as his personal D/s outlet.

A submissive's place is to serve and obey etc and, sadly, that's ALL he wants with you. He doesn't care if you have a favourite movie, colour, hobby or family life etc; it only matters that you do whatever he wants, when he wants it.... Now that's ok if he's honest about it and you stick around anyway - but I suspect no-one asked or informed you, ay?

I think you want a D/s relationship that has room for all you are and a dom who appreciates that about you. What you have is a dom who uses you for his D/s distractions and doubtless has someone else to go back to for the everyday needs you crave but which he doesn't require from you.

He's a selfish, deceitful, bum - question: Is he the right Master for *YOU*?

Well now, that's quite a big leap there don't you think?

It's just my opinion - as always.

You know for a fact that I'm wrong?

Focus.

I know for a fact you are CORRECT !!

crimsonvampyrss welcome to these boards. Hope they dont scare you as much as the responses already.

I remember very vividly the cries of my soul Feb 2004 when all I wanted was the sanity of normal life. I asked to get out of roleplay mode. I was very much what Focus has explained ~~ duped.
The rest of the story is sad sad sad and truly an amazing journey to where I am now.

>> Is he blatantly ignoring my need for normality, or is he simply
>> being the natural dominat that he is and trying to help mold me more.

He is blantaly ignoring YOU, the woman.
He is a bully, maybe a dominant alpha man, but definatley one who looks after his own lust and not you as a whole woman.

I want to hug you and say....dont stay.
Dont stay.

(in reply to Focus50)

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Post #: 33