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thedudetg -> What went wrong? (5/12/2008 4:14:11 PM)
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I found a girl, one that basically labels herself as a slave on this very site, and I felt there was an instant connection.
In her eyes and her smile, I saw a beauty I had seen in no other woman before. We talked over IM for only a few minutes, and was so enchanted by this woman and the things I knew of her, I asked her out for a vanilla date (she, like me, was interested in developing a little bit of a relationship before taking things to be more personal), and that was probably after only 20 minutes. I've never felt so certain of something in my life.
Due to prior engagements forgotten about until the last minute, she had to cancel our date, but we met later the same evening, and watched a movie and cuddled at my place. She was very worried I'd be upset with her, but I made it as clear as I could I wasn't. We scheduled a date for the following night. This time, she became ill and had to cancel, but we sent each other several text messages. The following day, there was no way we could meet; she had to tend to a friend of hers who was going through some emotional trouble. Again, we talked much more over text messages that evening, and talked about various BDSM things we were interested in. As far as I can tell, and as far as she let on, we fit pretty well together in this area. Partway through the night, I asked her what she thought about a pet name, and she actually said she would like to be called "Pet," since it was cute and made her feel submissive. At the end of the night, she asked if I would "keep her." I said "Of course," and she replied with a "Yaay!" Soon after this, she told me she was staying with her friend that night, since she'd been drinking a little there. We agreed on an actual date two days from this night.
The next day, things became murky. I asked her how she was doing in the afternoon, she said she was good, then I told her I was doing well, too. That night, I asked her to confirm that she could make our date planned for the subsequent night, but to my distress, I received no response. The following day, I sent a few messages asking her about the plans, as well, and eventually, the night passed without us meeting for dinner and a movie, and instead her telling me I wasn't right, but not explaining any reason why, via IM.
I can not, for the life of me, figure out what went wrong. The final conversation we had and the ones before it seemed to be from two different people, as far as I could tell. I can't figure out what caused the sudden switch in her outlook on me. I know she was drinking when she said several sweet things, and I know she wasn't looking for someone to dominate her 24/7, so I don't think it can be that. From how we talked, she was far too sweet a person to have been planning on hurting me from the very beginning, and she was entirely eager to go on a date with me, despite things needing to cancel. At times when talking, I spoke as a vanilla romantic interest, and at times, I spoke more like a dom would, but she seemed fond of both, as if I had hit the right pace for where we were in such a short relationship.
Are there any subs/slaves who have done something like this? I'm not angry at her, if she truly doesn't think I'm right this soon, even after what she asked above, then I can't blame her, but I am hurt, because for the first time, I completely left my guard down romantically, and I can not wrap my head around what went wrong between this girl I believe to be wonderful and myself.
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