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RE: PMS - how do deal with it - 5/13/2008 2:25:50 PM   
curiousPAlady


Posts: 8
Joined: 4/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

quote:

ORIGINAL: lilmissdefiant

i was wonder how Masters deal with their slaves while they are going through PMS?

in my person experience (as in happening right now) i get mood swings, bad cramps and i can be snappy and rude.
i dontknow how common these "symptoms" are but how would a Master deal with it knowing that how ever much the slave may try to control it, sometimes we just cant.



Contrary to my sig line.........I really do not believe that hormones are an excuse for poor behaviour. For myself, I stay in tune with my body and try to be aware of why I am feeling the way I am. Knowing that whatever my emotional reaction to a specific comment or action is, it is only "of the moment". I keep my mouth shut and walk away. Give myself time to keep that awareness. Step out of myself and watch.

I try to steer that energy towards something more positive. Usually something I can do by myself. Clean the barn, sort a closet, something that distances me from potential issues. I won't schedule employee reviews when I am feeling grumpy.

Basically I take responsibility for myself, my words and my actions. I would expect the same thing from my girl.



Not be offensive here but Im pretty sure there is a big difference in being a submissive with PMS and a Dominant with PMS.  Depending on the relationship dynamic, a submissive may not have the freedom or the permission to do what would best help HER during her PMS cycle. 

I leaned MY cycle so I knew what to do.  But my relationship was long distance, so I had the freedom to do what needed done during those days.  I could just hide out at home until the angry day passed LOL  I could sob all day on the sad PMS day.  And we tried to never plan our time together during that time.

My Master at the time was open to allowing me that time "off".  Since we didnt live together, I learned how to manage my PMS days without problems in the rela... but thats because I had the freedom to do so.  I doubt many slaves could do that.

So in MY mind, it does fall back to some degree on the Dominant.  Learning to understand her ebb and flow, and making sure she learns her own body helps greatly.  If not, any Dominant is just fighting nature, and not supporting his submissive when she needs his guidance and understanding the most.

As a Dominant, you would control your schedule and activities to manage your PMS.  And you mention taking responsibility for yourself.  But how much power, freedom, control would a slave have to dictate her PMS days so she can better manage HER symptoms???  Doesnt her Dominant have responsibility over her, over her actiities, over her life??? 

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: PMS - how do deal with it - 5/13/2008 2:28:46 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline 		PMS

POSITIVE MENTAL STIMULATION

When a gal can say the truth without apology!




_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to curiousPAlady)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: PMS - how do deal with it - 5/13/2008 2:38:41 PM   
Lumus


Posts: 5968
Joined: 9/16/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

PMS

POSITIVE MENTAL STIMULATION

When a gal can say the truth without apology!


Ahhhh.  But why didn't you just say so in the first place?

^_^



_____________________________

<Talk to educate; listen to learn.>

~ the other half of "L&L" ~

I have been dubbed the Rainmaker. Do not make me take your water for my tribe.

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: PMS - how do deal with it - 5/13/2008 2:41:15 PM   
curiousPAlady


Posts: 8
Joined: 4/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FlamingRedhead

There is absolutely no reason for you or anyone else to suffer during your menstrual cycle.  There are medications available that have been approved for the treatment of PMDD (premenstrual dysphoric disorder), such as Sarafem, Prozac, Zoloft, etc.  There are also birth control methods which may help reduce the symptoms, i.e. oral contraceptives, Mirena IUD and Depo-Provera.  They can reduce the duration of your period each month, restrict it to 4 times a year, or eliminate it altogether.  For physical symptoms, you can take Midol, Premsyn PMS or Pamprin.  In addition, there are herbal supplements such as St. John's Wort or black cohosh.
 
I agree that it's a reason to be in a foul mood, but it's not an excuse for disrespect.


I used holistic approaches to signficantly reduce and manage what at one time was horrific PMS.  Its important though to do it under the supervision of a skilled holistic physician or practitioner.  Not all women should be taking black cohosh or St. Johns Wort.  Nor is Soy an answer to PMS or perimenopause for all women.

Plant based estrogens can backfire if the woman has PCOS, some creams dont work enough, and there are other health conditions that factor into what you choose. 

For example, I got alot of success with Prometrium, which is a natural form of progesterone    That got me through severe perimenopause and PMS.  In the last two years, drinking Goji Juice daily has almost totally eliminated any symptoms of perimenopause and PMS.

I think that most women dont get the health support and intervention that we all need to help us with PMS, peri-menopause, and menopause.  For some, its mildly annoying or irritating.  But for others, those stages can be extreme, crippling, and yes unmanageable. 

I would hope that a good responsible, caring Dominant would help his submissive through those stages somehow, if only to give her more attention and affection when she is most struggling.   I dont see that as rewarding what may not be the best behavior, nor do I think anyone should tolerate abusive behavior.  But giving her comfort, stability, patience, caring can only help her.

And if you dont want to deal wtih a submisisve with PMS... either collar an older woman... or go collar a man.  Though as some have said, men have ebbs and flow with their energies, their focus, their moods too. We just dont have a name for it... LOL

(in reply to FlamingRedhead)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: PMS - how do deal with it - 5/13/2008 2:41:57 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lumus

quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

PMS

POSITIVE MENTAL STIMULATION

When a gal can say the truth without apology!


Ahhhh.  But why didn't you just say so in the first place?

^_^




Cause Daddy, You know way more than this wittle girl and you're alway wight, even when you are dead wrong.


_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to Lumus)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: PMS - how do deal with it - 5/13/2008 2:48:12 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: curiousPAlady

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

Contrary to my sig line.........I really do not believe that hormones are an excuse for poor behaviour. For myself, I stay in tune with my body and try to be aware of why I am feeling the way I am. Knowing that whatever my emotional reaction to a specific comment or action is, it is only "of the moment". I keep my mouth shut and walk away. Give myself time to keep that awareness. Step out of myself and watch.

I try to steer that energy towards something more positive.

Basically I take responsibility for myself, my words and my actions. I would expect the same thing from my girl.



So in MY mind, it does fall back to some degree on the Dominant.  Learning to understand her ebb and flow, and making sure she learns her own body helps greatly.  If not, any Dominant is just fighting nature, and not supporting his submissive when she needs his guidance and understanding the most.

As a Dominant, you would control your schedule and activities to manage your PMS.  And you mention taking responsibility for yourself.  But how much power, freedom, control would a slave have to dictate her PMS days so she can better manage HER symptoms???  Doesnt her Dominant have responsibility over her, over her actiities, over her life??? 


I kept the parts of my statement that are key to what I am going to say.

Regardless of dominant or submissive I am a huge advocate of personal responsibility. It is everyone's responsibility to be intune with their particular issues. It is also their responsibility as to how they project their personal issues out into their environment.

A major part of personal responsibility is communication. Let's someone in my home is feeling ill and they do not tell me. I give them a task that is difficult for them to accomplish as I expect, because of their illness, and they disappoint me. Who's at fault? Me for giving them the task when they were not well, or them for not telling me they were not well?

As far as being short tempered or any other emotional backlash some feel they can blame on hormones, and not take responsibility for........ I will not give a slave any more slack in that area than I give myself. Which is not much.


_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to curiousPAlady)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: PMS - how do deal with it - 5/13/2008 3:11:47 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: curiousPAlady

And if you dont want to deal wtih a submisisve with PMS... either collar an older woman... or go collar a man.  Though as some have said, men have ebbs and flow with their energies, their focus, their moods too. We just dont have a name for it... LOL


Or teach her to manage their PMS so the world doesn't have to stop because of it.  I wonder if these women with such PMS mood swings (and I have had them myself) take time off work for them?  Or do they manage them while at work?  Or do they just bitch at everyone at work?

I am not coddled just because I'm on my period.  I am expected to understand my cycles such that I don't burden everyone around me with them.  I don't live with my Master, but we schedule our visits around our schedules, period or not.  At times it has been really uncomfortable for me, but I'd rather be uncomfortable and in his presence than not.  To each their own, but that's my take.

_____________________________

Good is the enemy of great.

(in reply to curiousPAlady)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: PMS - how do deal with it - 5/13/2008 3:18:25 PM   
Hissltora


Posts: 41
Joined: 8/23/2007
Status: offline 		Thank you, LaTigresse, for saying what i wanted to say and couldn't find the right way to express.

Personal responsibility trumps whinebitchmoan in this house.

For those who truly think that PMS is something that should be worked around, treated with kid gloves or asbestos suits, try finding a Dom who will be "supportive" of your delicate condition. Compatibility before commitment.

slave tora, devoted to Sir N
(and currently PMS'ing)

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: PMS - how do deal with it - 5/13/2008 3:21:23 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

quote:

ORIGINAL: curiousPAlady

And if you dont want to deal wtih a submisisve with PMS... either collar an older woman... or go collar a man.  Though as some have said, men have ebbs and flow with their energies, their focus, their moods too. We just dont have a name for it... LOL


Or teach her to manage their PMS so the world doesn't have to stop because of it.  I wonder if these women with such PMS mood swings (and I have had them myself) take time off work for them?  Or do they manage them while at work?  Or do they just bitch at everyone at work?

I am not coddled just because I'm on my period.  I am expected to understand my cycles such that I don't burden everyone around me with them.  I don't live with my Master, but we schedule our visits around our schedules, period or not.  At times it has been really uncomfortable for me, but I'd rather be uncomfortable and in his presence than not.  To each their own, but that's my take.


I get sensitive more often than bitchy.

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: PMS - how do deal with it - 5/13/2008 3:27:39 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline 		That happens to me, too, lushy.  And I become physically ill, sometimes requiring time off work.

_____________________________

Good is the enemy of great.

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: PMS - how do deal with it - 5/13/2008 3:37:31 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

That happens to me, too, lushy.  And I become physically ill, sometimes requiring time off work.


PMS and whiskey amplifies this.

(Lushy...whos been living up to her new pet name on the weekend)

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: PMS - how do deal with it - 5/13/2008 4:11:34 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		It really depends on how bad it gets for them.  First I'd make sure they did everything they could to minimize the symptoms.  Drugs, therapy, sleep, water, eating right- a lot of people can make some improvements for themselves but don't prepare correctly.

Once we've minimized things as much as possible, I'd expect them to behave as normally as possible and ask permission for any special allowances.  I really doubt I'd ever be with someone who hasn't been menstruating for at least a few years so unless their body decides to change how it goes through that (which does happen), there's no reason they shouldn't anticipate the problems and be aware enough to ask permission for a break.

Allowances are made, but strictly.  This is a sensitive issue with me as I tend to see women use menstration as an excuse for their ill behavior and thoughts very often.  So I will be very keen on not edging towards that line.


http://www.collarchat.com/m_1270569/mpage_2/key_period/tm.htm#1271644
period lover

http://www.collarchat.com/m_875683/mpage_1/key_menstrual/tm.htm#875935
squick or squish (curious)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_718165/mpage_1/key_menstrual/tm.htm#718373
sex during heavy flow period

http://www.collarchat.com/m_684595/mpage_1/key_period/tm.htm#684607
Your slave and her menstruation

http://www.collarchat.com/m_606563/mpage_1/key_period/tm.htm#606939
Dealing with PMS as a sub

http://www.collarchat.com/m_502696/mpage_1/key_pms/tm.htm#502835
Menstrual Cycle...

http://www.collarchat.com/m_124443/mpage_1/key_period/tm.htm#124443
PMS and the submissive

http://www.collarchat.com/m_146172/mpage_1/key_period/tm.htm#146172
menstruation and sex

http://www.collarchat.com/m_222485/mpage_1/key_period/tm.htm#222485
should a sub be allowed

http://www.collarchat.com/m_420217/mpage_1/key_period/tm.htm#420217
period play?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_28039/mpage_1/key_pms/tm.htm#28039
serious question about pms

http://www.collarchat.com/m_366774/mpage_1/key_pms/tm.htm#366774
PMS from hell?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_166316/mpage_1/key_pms/tm.htm#166329
That time

The Rose Colored Week

How do you like your dom/master treating you on your period?


_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to lilmissdefiant)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: PMS - how do deal with it - 5/13/2008 4:14:14 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19
PMS and whiskey amplifies this.


LOL silly.

_____________________________

Good is the enemy of great.

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: PMS - how do deal with it - 5/13/2008 4:35:26 PM   
hopelessfool


Posts: 988
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Hissltora
 For one thing, He is not the reason i am not feeling well, so why punish Him? Two, He is not accepting of misbehavior of any kind during my time. i wouldn't lash out at others while suffering a migraine, and PMS is no more acceptable.


Actually Sex before ones cycle can cause the cramping and various other pains to be more intense, and painful... So in some cases yes he would be the reason I currently cant move...Instead of being able to deal with it the way I usually would. I.e. grit my teeth and be able to go about my day with some sense of normality.

Anywho, I know Im very emotional on my period, I do my best to remove myself from situations that would cause me to get in trouble. If my Owner is pushing something that I know would push my control, when not in a hormonal state, I politely would ask Him if we could bring this up later because my ability to control my temper is getting to a point where I will snap. If he continues, knowing Im at a breaking point Im sorry the man deserves Every rude word hes going to get, for pushing something he knew before hand I couldnt handle at this time.

As for how to deal with it, both parties depending on the sub/slave are involved. It might take the D type time to realize, that if pushed to hard to do certian things, It will end with me puking, and to allow me time to recover from the over exerstion and either cut slack, or have me continue at a slower pace with forced breaks. It takes me making sure Im taking everything I can to make sure I'm not going to be in a situation that I cant handle or express myself in a way that my owner might understand better. If my owner cant accept that I do get a period, and that even if I dont bleed the process takes a lot out of me, hes not goign to remain my owner for very long. If Im expected to take in account His moods, feelings, energy levels, exaustion levels and everything that makes up him. He should do the same in return, if he wishes to keep me at his side for very long.

But Thats just me...




_____________________________

" I have nothing left to give, I have found the perfect end, You remain to make it hurt, disappear in to the dirt, carry me to heavens arms.....Dear Agony Just let go of me, suffer slowly, is this the way its gotta be, Dear Agony...."

(in reply to Hissltora)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: PMS - how do deal with it - 5/13/2008 5:34:16 PM   
MadameXTC


Posts: 96
Joined: 9/30/2004
Status: offline 		 I am really moody when I have PMS too. Usually my Dominant and I butt heads when I have PMS, for the most part he just stays out of my way for a few days and punishes me if I get really bad. He is understanding, but at the same time I can't expect him to take that much. I agree with what another person has said. Usually an intense session if I am feeling up to it adjusts my harmones back out. Granted there are many times where he has to send me to bed because I am ill. My PMS symptoms are horrible. :( They range from bitting a persons head off to laying doubled over in bed unable to move.

_____________________________

"Dominance is best viewed through a submissive's actions"

(in reply to Lumus)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: PMS - how do deal with it - 5/13/2008 5:39:32 PM   
MontrealPhoenix


Posts: 1526
Joined: 2/27/2008
Status: offline 		to my way of thinking, he'll stay out of her way til the mood swings pass, lmao.
 

 
phoenix

_____________________________

"Only in a collar can a woman be truly free"
~Tribesmen of Gor ..pg 75

"He who ties a woman owns her"
~Guardsman Of Gor pg 267



(in reply to lilmissdefiant)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: PMS - how do deal with it - 5/13/2008 5:59:03 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19
PMS and whiskey amplifies this.


LOL silly.


I'm a handful. Sir deserves a medal for his self control.

_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: PMS - how do deal with it - 5/13/2008 6:09:30 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		I've never been an advocate of using menstruation as an excuse for anything, and I suffered terribly when I was young.  Why will they not just let us avowed non-breeders have hysterectomies?      Damn endometriosis!

Anyway, for some reason my pill got switched to generic and I couldn't for the life of me figure out what was wrong----I was having Bipolar Day without being bipolar!  Well DUH.  That was an exceptionally lousy few days, my tongue hurt from biting it!  Serious aggression, just plain OUT there impatience, all the things I wish I could be!  Honestly, I would have had to quit my job and move, no one would be speaking to me now if I had acted on every savage impulse.

I used to know a guy who was on nuclear submarines, and I told him that America's truest possible secret weapon was a fleet of subs entirely crewed by women.  They would totally take over the world, no need for exit strategies.  Srsly!  Imagine a whole boat load of women cycling at the same time, armed with nukes!

Okay, what were we talking about?  I think I'm going to go have some chocolate now.

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: PMS - how do deal with it - 5/13/2008 6:29:16 PM   
Interesdom


Posts: 197
Joined: 5/24/2004
From: England
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lilmissdefiant
i was wonder how Masters deal with their slaves while they are going through PMS?

I am normally sympathetic and understanding of her difficulties but I will not tolerate rudeness or disrespect.  I will usually accept, without comment, reduced service and some tardiness and even some short-termper, and I'm likely to cosset her more.

Slaves, like their owners, are humans.
Slaves, unlike their owners, are slaves.

(in reply to lilmissdefiant)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: PMS - how do deal with it - 5/13/2008 6:46:14 PM   
azropedntied


Posts: 1829
Joined: 7/25/2005
From: Phx AZ
Status: offline 		My thoughts exactly hiding in stealth mode is a great plan for this one .listens for the all clear  horn .

quote:

ORIGINAL: MontrealPhoenix

to my way of thinking, he'll stay out of her way til the mood swings pass, lmao.
 

 
phoenix

(in reply to MontrealPhoenix)
Profile   Post #: 40
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