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MsIncognito -> RE: Ironic (10/23/2005 6:25:47 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: JohnWarren
If you see that as some form of unacceptable behavior, I'd recommend you punish them by withdrawing your person.
I'm sorry if my rather tongue-in-cheek comments offended as that was not my intent. However, nowhere did I say that this was unacceptable behaviour. I'm sorry you felt defensive enough to jump to that conclusion. As someone who has seen/been a member of/post/lurked on quite a few BDSM sites over the years I simply asked why there were such vast difference between sites. It's a shame an opportunity to educated turned into defensive posturing.
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As someone who ran a BDSM group and was constantly told "you should be doing this" by people who weren't risking their personal safety and finances, I can understand why CollarMe would want to minimize their risk.
I've been involved in many such groups (not just online and not just BDSM related) and never have I suggested that those who run groups should subjugate themselves to the bitching and moaning of ThoseWhoComplainButDon'tActivelyMakeChange. Again, I'm genuinely sorry if a question followed by a tongue in cheek comment caused such distress. However, I would like to point out that nowhere did I suggest that CollarMe sucks or that CollarMe should change their policies to reflect my world view or even that CollarMe was doing anything wrong. Any such erroneous infereces by others are not my responsibility.
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Don't forget they could completely minimize it by closing the board. They certainly aren't depending on it for a living and I'm sure it's a constant expense.
Ahh, yes, the 'shut up since they could just take it all away if they really wanted to' argument. Again, nowhere did I criticize CollarMe for their choices. I asked a question give the very obvious disparity I've notice and my comments did not go beyond that, though they seem to have been interpreted far beyond my intent.
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One of the sad things about the scene is that everyone has expectations but not many are willing to step up to the plate. I have a lot of respect for the people who keep CollarMe operating and can understand why, given the present climate, they want to cut down on the obvious risk factors
And I actually agree with you. However, I think that owners of such sites have to realize that they need the "complainers" just as much, if not more, than the "complainers" need them. This site relies on a sense of community to some degree. Without a variety of users (free or paid) all of the efforts in setting up such a community are eventually for naught. While I agree that this site and the servers on which they reside are private property and the owners can do whatever they wish with them, impose whatever rules or community standards they wish that should NOT preclude people from asking questions. It also should not mean that someone such as myself who asked an honest question should be silenced for doing so.
Again, my apologies if my comments offended somehow but I think if you look at what I actually said objectively you'll see that there was no need for the knee-jerk reaction.
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