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ShaktiSama -> RE: Points of attraction to a domme (5/17/2008 3:53:45 PM)
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Overall, the most attractive submissive is always first and foremost a gentleman, even if he cultivates a brattish or Bad Boy pose as part of his masochistic persona. Even when he is being his brattiest, he does not say genuinely hurtful or hateful things, for example--he's a dashing rogue, not Andrew Dice Clay.
He has a generally positive attitude toward others and himself.
He has a complete absence of ugly common traits: nasty turns of temper, flakitude, lies and manipulation, passive aggression, pushiness, whining, inconsideration, disregard for a woman's feelings or the fact that she is a human being and not a life-support system for his fetishes, etc.
He has a general respect and reverence for women in general, and an awareness of women's issues which is not tainted by male supremacy or misogyny.
He has a lively intelligence and a sharp wit, the ability to converse with me and make me laugh.
He has a sane, pleasant, non-conflicted acceptance of his own submissive and masochistic needs as a man, and of dominant or sadistic desires in a woman. He is willing to discuss the latter before he starts aggressively negotiating to meet the former.
He shows a visible effort to be pleasing, useful and attractive to women, with some effort spent making the most of his assets as a person.
He has the ability to communicate well.
He has a rich inner life with a great deal of imagination.
He has a healthy sexual appetite and strong drives, both vanilla and submissive/masochistic, which he nevertheless has the strength of character and will to control and direct so that he is not a brute, a pest or a tramp.
He has a deep need to please his domme and bask in her approval and love.
There are other things I find attractive which are more quirky and personal to me, and some more general things which are true even of people who are potential vanilla friends, like "having shared interests with me" or "appreciating me as a person and my creative work". But these are the things I regard as attractive specifically in a submissive man. I posted the list because I think most of them are things that are pretty easily within reach for men of all ages, body types, walks of life, income levels, etc.. You don't have to be a fashion model or the CEO of a major corporation to be a desirable submissive.
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