|
HizBabyGirl -> Am I looking/expecting the impossible? (5/23/2008 2:00:55 AM)
|
I think I already know the "answer" here, but having picked the wrong people practically my entire life (or maybe letting the wrong people choose me) I would feel better with some feedback.
I "met" this guy online and he says he is a dom and he wants to be my dom. But it has not had the right feel to it. Now, we have not gotten together yet, and maybe once we did it would feel right. But for now its like this. I'm a very "touchy feely" kind of person, physically and with words/emotions. I like to talk and share my feelings. I want a dom who likes to do the same. I would like a dom who (this won't fit with the ones who view doms and dom behavior in a very narrow set of actions, I guess some might say I don't want a dom but I want a lover). Well, I want both, I want a master/daddy who will be just that with me but also be loving and nurturing and I thought I made that clear in my profile. When I "met" this guy he said he wanted to be my daddy. But now, he always says he wants me to be his slave and I am not a slave. He says he wants to collar me and eventually marry me. He says he wants me to do things like body/cock worship for him (and I have no problem with that, I love doing that) and he wants me to always be there for him. But though I have told him I want things like just notes, quick ones, to say hi or whatever, they never happen. The email I send him rarely gets any response. He calls me maybe once a week and it seems he wants help getting off (sexually). I told him that tonight on the phone and he got really ticked off. (Is this a case where the best defense is an offense?) He says he's a very busy man and he doesn't want to be tired in the morning so he couldn't talk anymore. I will grant you that I have gotten very short with him on the phone and told him to leave me the hell alone but then five days or so later he will call and try to patch things up. After a couple of minutes "schmoozing" he says so are we okay and I say yes and then its back to the same old same old. No calls, no notes. I send him e-cards that don't get responded to.
Tonight he said he wants me and we need to get together. (He lives about 800 miles from me). He said he would pay for the ticket. But my feeling right now is to hell with him. Every time I try to talk about emotional needs he gets exasperated. He's always either sick, busy, worried, tired. What the hell would I be anyway? He says I am not being "obedient"? WTF? Is this a one way thing, I was thinking that even though I am a submissive there might be something in it for me too, that my other needs might be important? I don't feel like he has earned my obedience. I can hear all the groans now about doms earning stuff. Help me out, please?
Should I go and meet him (I do believe it is "safe") and hope that actually in person he can be more hands on or am I wasting my time?
|
|
|
|
