Specific techniques?

Specific techniques? (Full Version)

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MakingYouSing -> Specific techniques? (5/29/2008 12:15:40 PM)
Hey, all. New dom here. I've got the headspace thing figured out, the mentality, but I''m working on specific tasks and techniques that help develop a submissive. I know, to some extent everything is personalized, but I'm looking for suggestions from established masters who have specific techniques or tasks or what-have-you that have helped. Thanks!

DesFIP -> RE: Specific techniques? (5/29/2008 12:18:57 PM)
The first thing he taught me was how he liked his tea. The ordinary comforts of life. He'll eat quiche for lunch maybe once a year, he won't ever eat peas. He's fine with a bowl of peas on the table but not in soup or casseroles or such. What matters to you? What are the little things that make you feel better or worse? Teach them.

SimplyMichael -> RE: Specific techniques? (5/29/2008 7:55:00 PM)
I have found that developing a genuine sense of modesty helped tremendously. The other thing is that learning techniques without understand the concept behind them is meaningless.

peppermint -> RE: Specific techniques? (5/29/2008 11:12:41 PM)
I read your question to my Sir. He says what helped him the most was hands on learning techniques from other more experienced Doms. If he saw someone doing something he had no experience with, he'd ask the Dom to show him how to do it. That's how he learned play piercing, suturing, single tails, etc.

antipode -> RE: Specific techniques? (5/29/2008 11:13:00 PM)
Your posting seems to indicate you think "being dom" is something one learns, or, as you put it, "figures out" - but dom is something you are, it is a state of being. And I must honestly admit I have never developed a sub with what-have-yous.

Archer -> RE: Specific techniques? (5/29/2008 11:23:28 PM)
One of the most natural training a service person techniques I ever heard was basicly Don't try to serve me for the next week simply shadow me and observe how I do things. Additional training in how to observe not just watch may be required for some folks. observe with the idea that you will be expected to replicate the action, much like an OJT trainign week. This works better on slightly experienced service folks. Completely new folks may have a bit more difficulty. Another basic technique that seldom goes wrong is the 3 step learning process 1. watch, 2. do with me, 3. do by yourself. This works well for those folks who learn through touch or visually as opposed to audio (listening).

DiurnalVampire -> RE: Specific techniques? (5/29/2008 11:30:38 PM)
The basic technique that has always worked best for me is "Ask." I have asked Fox to do dishes for me. I ask him to have coffee ready for me when I get home after work. I have asked him to do varous chores.I even ask him if he would like to hurt for me, some evenings. Now, months later, most of the things I had asked have become understood tasks that barely need mentioning anymore. However, he wouldnt have known i wanted them without my asking first, and demanding he do them right off wold have made him too nervous about doing them correctly. It always helps to ask. DV

Focus50 -> RE: Specific techniques? (5/30/2008 3:19:13 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MakingYouSing Hey, all. New dom here. I've got the headspace thing figured out, the mentality, but I''m working on specific tasks and techniques that help develop a submissive. I know, to some extent everything is personalized, but I'm looking for suggestions from established masters who have specific techniques or tasks or what-have-you that have helped. Thanks! Help develop a submissive..... into..... what? I teach, or train, or develop MY submissive to do the things I require of her. My most common or generalised technique is to tell/show her how I want whatever it is I want done then ask her, "Any questions?" Now, some things are complicated and she may need time to get it right.... That's fair enough, but once she demonstrates competency, then I'm not so understanding at her under-achieving.... Me, I'm not one for freely giving my secrets over to any ole self styled "new dom" - you might be some nilla looking to manipulate a naive newbie sub etc. However, if and when you have a specific problem giving you grief through your general inexperience etc, I'll gladly offer some equally specific advice. IE, it's no good telling me you're a new dom - show it, first! Focus.

IronBear -> RE: Specific techniques? (5/30/2008 7:43:06 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Archer One of the most natural training a service person techniques I ever heard was basicly Don't try to serve me for the next week simply shadow me and observe how I do things. Additional training in how to observe not just watch may be required for some folks. observe with the idea that you will be expected to replicate the action, much like an OJT trainign week. This works better on slightly experienced service folks. Completely new folks may have a bit more difficulty. Another basic technique that seldom goes wrong is the 3 step learning process 1. watch, 2. do with me, 3. do by yourself. This works well for those folks who learn through touch or visually as opposed to audio (listening). I agree with this 100% with the exceptions of postures ort possitions i require a slave to take on command and these days my joints won't allow me to demonstrate but i do have and use diagrams and photos. The other thing I found (painfully) is that in the early days of service, do not allow the new slave to serve hot drinks. Odds are he or she will be nervous and spill the tea or coffee in your lap and you can bet it is scolding hot. (I have scares on my belly to show for one such instant. Iron Bear Master of Bruin Cottage (A Victorian Lifestyle poly home) "I judge a Man by what I see him do and not by what others tell me he does." (Captain Sir Edward Pellew of the HMS Indefatigable to Midshipman Hornblower ~ C.S. Forrester)

celticlord2112 -> RE: Specific techniques? (5/30/2008 11:14:03 AM)
quote: One of the most natural training a service person techniques I ever heard was basicly Don't try to serve me for the next week simply shadow me and observe how I do things. Now just how in the hell are you supposed to find reasons to punish the slave with a tactic like that? Oh, sure, it actually works in the realm of real teaching, but still.....[8D][8D][8D] Next you'll be advocating what, common sense? (the horror....)

Missokyst -> RE: Specific techniques? (5/30/2008 11:32:17 AM)
Hush.. we all know you guys learn these things by osmosis.. something only doms can do. <g> Subs have to be dragged along until we get things right. Kyst

respectyourowner -> RE: Specific techniques? (5/30/2008 12:07:22 PM)
I find that training a new slave is very hard work. After she was trained life got a lot easier. Make sure that you discipline in a way that she understands that you are upset when she messes up. If she thinks that it is fun to be "bad" she will be "bad". Punish her in ways that she does not like.

celticlord2112 -> RE: Specific techniques? (5/30/2008 3:27:38 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Missokyst Hush.. we all know you guys learn these things by osmosis.. something only doms can do. <g> Subs have to be dragged along until we get things right. Kyst Well....slaves do have all that long hair for a reason, right? [8D]

Huntertn -> RE: Specific techniques? (5/31/2008 4:42:03 PM)
what he says...celticlord2112..and..IronBear too....[still has scars to prove it too] But what DiurnalVampire says about long term training is very good too. Even patton once said never give an order you know will Not be followed....

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