RE: Succeeding as a submissive amongst dominants?

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LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Succeeding as a submissive amongst dominants? (5/30/2008 8:49:03 PM)
Being subly at work is not dumb when it's what the job requires. My boss absolutely adores and needs fawning and faux submission- it makes him feel very manly, in charge, and helps his ego a lot. The fact that I know it's a complete act on my part and that he's happy living behind such an easily fabricated illusion tends to add a small bit of pleasure to an otherwise annoying position. But in order to get stuff DONE, I need to be aggressive. So I am with affiliates, clients, processing people etc. With him? No. Sometimes you really do get more done with honey. It all depends on the job. And none of that has anything to do with one's personal relationship orientation.

Skully7000 -> RE: Succeeding as a submissive amongst dominants? (5/30/2008 9:10:05 PM)
I'm picturing the scene from "the Secretary" when the woman says "oh another ____ " and tries to push right into the office and the secretary stands up to her. She found her strength in his orders. Your friend can do the same. even if they are not orders from a Master... she must realize that she is a servant to her job, her company. in order to the job justice, to properly serve and meet the requirements she must stand up to her co-workers. also I'm thinking of a Head Sissy Maid running a Tea Service. or a majordommo organizing/running a house/family. hope that helps in some way. Cheers Skully

madshysoul -> RE: Succeeding as a submissive amongst dominants? (5/30/2008 9:16:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Valiant As a near 50 year old male dominant there is a limit to what I can share with a 26 year old lady her to help her so I wondered if any submissives or slaves here might have thouights or advice on how she can reconcile being sub AND present the professional personna she sees as being key to success.? Find her a copy of the book "The Corporate Dominatrix." I'm in a similar position, high-profile job, young woman, submissive. That was a rather helpful book for me. Here's the link to it on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Corporate-Dominatrix-Roles-Play-Your/dp/141694074X

NorthernGent -> RE: Succeeding as a submissive amongst dominants? (5/31/2008 1:19:03 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross Being subly at work is not dumb when it's what the job requires. My boss absolutely adores and needs fawning and faux submission- it makes him feel very manly, in charge, and helps his ego a lot. Yeah, it will help you get where you want to go. But, what about your principles? Is a person to whore himself/herself out? I'm sure we've all come across bosses who need their cock sucking now and again, but does the gain outweigh the cost to self-esteem?

xxblushesxx -> RE: Succeeding as a submissive amongst dominants? (5/31/2008 9:21:06 AM)
Oh hell...just because she talks in the tone that she knows makes her boss happy, she's whoring herself out? Really? Must be nice to live in a world where you can just say whatever you want to whomever you want, whenever you like. Most can't.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Succeeding as a submissive amongst dominants? (5/31/2008 9:44:07 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: NorthernGent Yeah, it will help you get where you want to go. But, what about your principles? Is a person to whore himself/herself out? I'm sure we've all come across bosses who need their cock sucking now and again, but does the gain outweigh the cost to self-esteem? You do know I am an actual whore, yes? What principles do you speak? The job gets done well, customers are happy, boss is happy, and I know exactly how to manipulate the situation to get what I want and get good results. How exactly is my self esteem harmed by knowing I can easily manipulate my boss into seeing some illusion of who I am? I know it's just a front, I know it's because his actual sense of security is paper thin.

Aynne -> RE: Succeeding as a submissive amongst dominants? (5/31/2008 9:56:29 AM)
I agree Christina. That is not only highly unlikely but impractical as well. I have been the VP of a general contracting firm for 15 years. Some days it is nothing but ass kissing, be it vendors, co-workers, clients, or yes, even the boss, my ex-husband. ugh. My job is producing a project, keeping the clients happy, and getting the check. If I have to stoke some..egos to do it, big frigging deal. It has no bearing on my morals or ethics either. quote: ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx Oh hell...just because she talks in the tone that she knows makes her boss happy, she's whoring herself out? Really? Must be nice to live in a world where you can just say whatever you want to whomever you want, whenever you like. Most can't.

sylee -> RE: Succeeding as a submissive amongst dominants? (5/31/2008 10:12:16 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Skully7000 ... she must realize that she is a servant to her job, her company. in order to the job justice, to properly serve and meet the requirements she must stand up to her co-workers. This is a very good point. I spend a lot of time in one of the chat rooms on this site; as a moderator even. Believe it or not, occasionally I come across some folks who believe that, because the profess to be a Dominant, I am obligated to behave obsequiously, fawn all over them and let them do whatever they want. Sometimes I am rebuked for not behaving submissively when I am doing my job. I always counter that criticism with the fact that I am, in fact fulfilling my role as a submissive to the room (or the owners of the room). *** I will now put on my psuedo "I know everything" hat and say that, to me, it sounds like she is searching to belong to something or someone. I suspect that she behaves this way in all aspects of her life, not just at work; that she is looking to fill an empty place in herself from outside, rather than from within. If I am right, her difficulties at work are symptoms of the problem, not the problem itself. Peace

NorthernGent -> RE: Succeeding as a submissive amongst dominants? (5/31/2008 11:25:36 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross What principles do you speak? The principle of I'm not bending for no fucker under no circumstances.

NorthernGent -> RE: Succeeding as a submissive amongst dominants? (5/31/2008 11:33:11 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx Oh hell...just because she talks in the tone that she knows makes her boss happy, she's whoring herself out? Really? Must be nice to live in a world where you can just say whatever you want to whomever you want, whenever you like. Most can't. Saying whatever you like to whomever you want versus bending over backwards, are not the only options. What about being courteous but upfront? What does the contract of employment state?

xxblushesxx -> RE: Succeeding as a submissive amongst dominants? (5/31/2008 11:44:37 AM)
I fail to see where she said she was bending over backwards. A little charm can go a long way. As can being a blunt s.o.b. I know which one would last longer if I were the employer. (given, of course, the same talents, work ethic, etc.)

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Succeeding as a submissive amongst dominants? (5/31/2008 2:11:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: NorthernGent The principle of I'm not bending for no fucker under no circumstances. Well, why would I choose to have that princple? Seems very ineffective and impractical for most situations. Even someone who owns their business tends to need to bend for a lot of people and a lot of situations- I don't see why that's a bad thing or something to be against all the time? Secondly it should be remembered that my pretending to act in a submission fashion to him should not be confused with ACTUALLY acting in a submissive fashion to him, nor with a submissive ceding authority to a dominant in a Ds personal relationshp.

subtee -> RE: Succeeding as a submissive amongst dominants? (5/31/2008 2:44:32 PM)
We spend so much of our lives at work, why choose to adopt a persona? Politeness and appropriate graciousness counts, but I'm not going to exert effort day in and day out to express something I am not. I did that too much in my youth and am relishing being me day in and day out, now that I am...not in my youth.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Succeeding as a submissive amongst dominants? (5/31/2008 5:32:53 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: subtee We spend so much of our lives at work, why choose to adopt a persona? Politeness and appropriate graciousness counts, but I'm not going to exert effort day in and day out to express something I am not. I did that too much in my youth and am relishing being me day in and day out, now that I am...not in my youth. That makes sense to me- and that's actually something I say about public socialization and my personal relationships. A lot of people adopt a persona in even the free-est of situations because they are just so used to it and can't trust the people they choose to be around. For me it's because at this time, this particular job is enough of a reward to make whatever loss I have for that worthwhile. While there are certain professions I'd be able to work in that would allow me to be pretty much myself and not adopt any persona, I haven't yet decided that those are really what would fulfill me in the long term or allow me to co-exist with the other things I find important. Otherwise, pretty much all other jobs would force me to pretend on a level most of the time- I'm not a team player, I'm not a morning person, I don't want to talka bout my social life at work (mostly because people at work wouldn't like hearing about it). So even if I had the best boss in the world, I'd still be faking it most of the time.

SimplyMichael -> RE: Succeeding as a submissive amongst dominants? (5/31/2008 7:07:29 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: NorthernGent The workplace is a zone populated by actors - regardless of orientation. There are unwritten rules of behaviour and a code of ethics that we all must comply with in the event we wish to succeed; I doubt most of us would comply were it not for the carrot dangled in front of us. It's a game; assuming she's in it to win it, she better hone her acting skills or she'll find herself on the wrong end of the pleasure of a bigger, hungrier wolf. More than anything though, it's all in the mind; she must think she can do it. LA, see Gent agrees with you but he just forgot...

AquaticSub -> RE: Succeeding as a submissive amongst dominants? (6/1/2008 11:40:57 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: NorthernGent quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross What principles do you speak? The principle of I'm not bending for no fucker under no circumstances. Oddly, I'd consider letting someone take credit for my work without a fight more of a violation to that then playing subby to enhance my career.

Valiant -> RE: Succeeding as a submissive amongst dominants? (6/1/2008 12:50:59 PM)
Many thanks to all who have bothered to contribute. It is interesting to see the variety of responses. Valiant

Marysboi -> RE: Succeeding as a submissive among-st dominants? (6/2/2008 9:15:07 AM)
I should apologize for responding without reading all the prior posts. I believe it was in Elsie Sutton's Female Superiority site she talks about using the female dominance in the workplace. There is a different dynamic a female can bring to the corporate world that is far different than the normal male environment. Its sexual in nature, shoes, dress etc. thats done with a hint of sexuality, (without being whorish). That can be quite powerful. Of course the females ability to pull it off has to have an air of self confidence to complete the style. To try and compete with the wolves by their own rules is futile because the age old mindset of conservative male domination will easily dismiss the female. Only because shes female. But she can win by taking this disadvantage and turning into her strength.

Marysboi -> RE: Succeeding as a submissive among-st dominants? (6/2/2008 9:21:23 AM)
Having gone back and read some other posting, Lucky Albatross has some wise thoughts, I should have read more before posting..

NorthernGent -> RE: Succeeding as a submissive amongst dominants? (6/2/2008 12:18:29 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: AquaticSub quote: ORIGINAL: NorthernGent quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross What principles do you speak? The principle of I'm not bending for no fucker under no circumstances. Oddly, I'd consider letting someone take credit for my work without a fight more of a violation to that then playing subby to enhance my career. I think there's more use in taking a hit now and again on the understanding that choosing your battles wisely will serve you well, than there is in a change of persona for 40/50 hours a week.

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