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Owner4SexSlave -> Trying to Explain yourself to Kinky non-lifestylers (6/4/2008 12:45:27 AM)
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Let's say you're a Dom and you meet somebody really interesting, and find out they are into Kinky rough sex. They express a deep love to having wicked things done to them, everything seems to be clicking along good. Then they express an interest in doing wicked things to you? Wait a minute, you suddenly realize in complete terror that you have Switch on your hands. Then you have to break the news to them that you're not into having those things done to you. They sigh, gasp, perhaps make renarks about how unfair it is. They start down the path attempted negotions. Such as I'll let you do this to me, if you let me do this to you. Perhaps you stop for a moment give say 2.5 seconds honest thought and the answer is still the same, no. Then you find yourself explaining to them what Dom, sub, and switch more less is all about.
I'm sorry, I'm not into have dog shock collars around my neck, being tied up and spanked and blah blah blah... But I Love doing those things to somebody though. Only to hear, but but but ... "that's not fair". I openly admit it's not fair to somebody who is a switch. My thing is if somebody is going to have a shock collar around my neck with a push button device, guess what she's better be wearing one too and I'm gonna have a button in my hand. OK, now let's dance! See who can dish it out and take it at the same time. They did to back down at the thoughts of this degree of playing fully fair. Some people might consider this a little switchy, but it's more like a head to head BDSM scene match for me. Have yet to encounter anybody willing to engage in head to head play like this, at least not for several years.
OK, I'm not into becoming Fido with a shock collar around my neck, not up for Trade on the table. I'm not gonna offer my ass to be cropped either. I did say, hey I Love having my back flogged. Turns out I had to explain to them what one was, then to deal with them getting squicked out about hitting somebody on other places of the body besides the ass. They are puzzled at why I'd let them flog my back and not spank my ass. Anyways, basically things don't really go so well in all the back and fourth conversation. They are still trying hard and their damnest to figure out what it would take to get an Shock Collar around my friggen neck.
You politely excuse yourself from the conversation, and well just sort of avoid going there at all with this other person. However, you find out later you were such a mean unreasonable selfish bastard. This is after you've already explained to them the difference between Dom, sub, switch and topping/bottom basics. Yes, I'm one of those guys that loves being in control and not being controlled. I Love to use but not be used.. and yadda yadda yadda..
I know submissive types catch flack from people for being so called Doormats. I've caught flack for being a so called "Control freak" all because of my orientation. My maso streak/side seems to throw people a few curve balls they don't seem to get right away. Head to Head kink play well, let's just say... is a turn on for me, but not for too many others.
Still it's a challenge to explain things to Kinky Vanilla's at times and have them understand things. You know where Doms are selfish assholes that won't girls do kinky wicked things in exchange, and girls that let Doms do this are Doormats and blah blah blah blah! Just feel like slapping myself right in the middle of my forehead after I pound an 8 oz can of V8 through theirs.
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