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Questions That Haunt Me - 6/5/2008 9:12:34 AM

LotusSong

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Can you cry under water?

How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

What disease did cured ham actually have?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.

Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME STUFF, why didn't he just buy dinner?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

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RE: Questions That Haunt Me - 6/5/2008 9:24:01 AM

MakeMeSmile4U

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.

LOL - I actually asked my doctor that once... He said it was inappropriate to watch me get dressed. My response: "Pfft - you've just done things in places my husband's never seen." He wasn't amused (but I was).

Also here's one for your very funny list- Why do we park in a driveway but drive on a parkway?

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RE: Questions That Haunt Me - 6/5/2008 9:28:17 AM

CalifChick

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Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?

Because pants used to be two separate legs tied together with strings at the top. Over time, styles changed and they were sewn together. A brassiere has always been one garment.

Cali

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RE: Questions That Haunt Me - 6/5/2008 9:34:37 AM

Asherdelampyr

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?

I know the answer to this one... its yes... sinceahearse is almost always driven by two living people (In case the body gets out of hand I suppose)

I know too many mortitians

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RE: Questions That Haunt Me - 6/5/2008 10:33:07 AM

GreedyTop

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quote:

Can you cry under water?

yes. Your tear ducts don't stop working just because you're under water.

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RE: Questions That Haunt Me - 6/5/2008 11:08:47 AM

MakeMeSmile4U

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quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

quote:

Can you cry under water?

yes. Your tear ducts don't stop working just because you're under water.

But your period stops when you're immersed in water... not that i'm complaining lol, just wondering about the physics

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RE: Questions That Haunt Me - 6/5/2008 11:32:17 AM

GreedyTop

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hm.. cant say that I've ever been underwater long enough that my periods STOPPED.

(of course..if I was UNDERWATER long enough for them to stop, I'd be dead...)

< Message edited by GreedyTop -- 6/5/2008 11:33:14 AM >

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RE: Questions That Haunt Me - 6/5/2008 6:00:57 PM

awakenednj

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Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to? because no one wants to hear your 2 cents. they are asking for your thoughts if they offer a penny. Annoyance tax? tell me how much I owe at the end of this....

Can you cry under water? Yes, but you wont know it

What disease did cured ham actually have? trichinosis

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage? Man on the moon was government funded.... nuf said :)

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours? newborns wake up every 2 hours. most infants sleep through the night and wake you up butt-crack early on the weekends.

Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV? Well the TV is too small for the actors to crawl into silly...

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway. They aren't supposed to look at your face and nakedness at the same time... the separation makes it clinical for patient & dr

Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural? Cali got it

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat? who says only decent human beings eat toast. My boss loves burnt toast...

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him? Because Stupid is a diety that has yet to find a limitation.

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ? Yes, but shouldnt you be asking if it would get a ticket?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs! I assumed Goofy was really from Narnia.

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons? Often, Yes. The ones around me spout quite a bit of it anyway.

Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune? Because teachers were so busy taking pencils out of noses etc that they just didnt have time to come up with another tune. Mozart wrote that tune after all..

Why did you just try singing the two songs above? Nope

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window? Cats dont have this issue :)

< Message edited by awakenednj -- 6/5/2008 6:05:37 PM >

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RE: Questions That Haunt Me - 6/10/2008 1:30:06 AM

JulieorSarah

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MakeMeSmile4U

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

quote:

Can you cry under water?

yes. Your tear ducts don't stop working just because you're under water.

But your period stops when you're immersed in water... not that i'm complaining lol, just wondering about the physics

I'm no scientist, but i think its that the pressure of the water is greater than the force of the fluids coming from the body. It's different to when you pee ... i think that's why women who are learning to water ski have to wear body suits ... hope this vague explanatin covers it for you.

It's not that you period stops, it continues, it's just the flow is stopped by the pressure of the water.

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RE: Questions That Haunt Me - 6/15/2008 1:04:03 PM

electriclove

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quote:

LOL - I actually asked my doctor that once... He said it was inappropriate to watch me get dressed. My response: "Pfft - you've just done things in places my husband's never seen." He wasn't amused (but I was).

My Doctor is a very pretty, Filipino girl, as it turns out. On two separate occasions, she has given me the old "digital" exam for my prostate. I have told her that she is a lot prettier to look at than my last primary care physician. She just laughed. She's cool.

David in Miami

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RE: Questions That Haunt Me - 6/15/2008 4:09:32 PM

Griswold

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

(Where are the damn cameras?)

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RE: Questions That Haunt Me - 6/16/2008 11:19:03 AM

SteelofUtah

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Question: If a Cat always Lands on it's Feet and Buttered Toast always lands Butter side down, if you Tied a Piece of Toast Butter Side up to a Cats Back and threw it out a Two story window what would happen?

Answer: The Universe would not be able to handle the Physics Involved in this Test and the Cat and Toast would Spontaneously combust and cause a rip in the space time continum and allow Dick Clark to Escape Death for another 100 years. As you can see this has already been done 2 or 3 times so far. Children Stop this Nonsense DICK CLARK MUST BE STOPPED!!!!

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RE: Questions That Haunt Me - 6/18/2008 12:24:58 AM

Rafters

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quote:

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway. They aren't supposed to look at your face and nakedness at the same time... the separation makes it clinical for patient & dr

Doctors probably don't watch, for the reason interrogators probably do. There are psychological implications of being watched, of breaking a taboo, losing the ego boost of clothes and being an active participant (rather than passive "victim") in someones [ab]use of your body.

Plus it provides a clean cut off between a clothed, status indicating, dignified member of society, and a stripped, worried, speculum warming, finger riding, whiner. It skips the messy etiquette questions of what role you are supposed to play to your doctor, when only half your clothes are off.

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RE: Questions That Haunt Me - 6/18/2008 12:31:38 AM

JulieorSarah

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SteelofUtah

Question: If a Cat always Lands on it's Feet and Buttered Toast always lands Butter side down, if you Tied a Piece of Toast Butter Side up to a Cats Back and threw it out a Two story window what would happen?

Answer: The Universe would not be able to handle the Physics Involved in this Test and the Cat and Toast would Spontaneously combust and cause a rip in the space time continum and allow Dick Clark to Escape Death for another 100 years. As you can see this has already been done 2 or 3 times so far. Children Stop this Nonsense DICK CLARK MUST BE STOPPED!!!!

Steel

is this what's happend to Cliff Richards?

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RE: Questions That Haunt Me - 6/19/2008 12:07:08 AM

ArchaicSquid

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if a vegetarian eats vegetables what dose a humanitarian eat?

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RE: Questions That Haunt Me - 6/19/2008 12:58:51 AM

heartcream

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Cute 'make ya think' thread.

Round boxes are likely more difficult to make than straight edged ones.

My period doesnt altogether stop really in the water.

I have cried underwater. I created the Pacific Ocean with my tears. Okay maybe not.

Taking clothes off being watched by someone else can be primal, seductive. It would be totally weird to have a doc watching, unless it was a female doctor, I wouldnt feel as uncomfortable then.

Baby oil is usually made of mineral oil, which in fact is highly toxic and is best avoided by all. It breaks down the immune system, the skin cannot breath, it is petroleum, gasoline by product, and apparently more expensive to throw away than it is to sell. Most mainstream lotions and lots of beauty products contain it as well.

Going on a tall building offers a very different perspective on things. It is not often you can see the world from on top of it. It makes sense to want to see the uniqueness up close with binoculars.

I imagine Heaven is beyond magical and you wear whatever you damn well please.

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RE: Questions That Haunt Me - 6/19/2008 4:06:54 PM

MasterHypnotist

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I got my first prostate exam, looked over my shoulder and said to my doctor, "So, some guys like this, huh?"

Doctor said, "Yes, but we charge them double."

I miss him.

MH

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RE: Questions That Haunt Me - 6/19/2008 5:51:26 PM

bscootin

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i had questions when i was in 6th grade...

1. if our eyes are wet, why is it we see things dry?

2. if being out in the sun makes plants green and alot of bright colors (flowers), then why are humans ranging from every color but green? there's pale white, white, peach, tanned peach, sunburn, then the skin color darkens through all kinds of colors - and i've seen people who were so black, that they couldn't wear black clothes in dim rooms because it would look like they were naked. but why not green?

3. what is it in our bodies that makes our hearts beat? i know the heart pumps the blood that circulates through out our entire system, giving oxygen to the vains and nerves, muscle tissue and skin... but what inside us makes the heart beat? i asked a doctor once if it was the brain, he said no, because the brain is what sends the signals to breathe and to move your arms and feet - breathing you can control with your mind, you can hold it, breathe fast, breathe slow, and even disturb a breathing pattern simply by coughing, but your brain is giving the signals to change your breathing... the brain can't regulate a heart rate or heart beat, nothing can unless people have a pacemaker (that's what a doc told me once...) so i'm still wondering - what makes the heart beat?

4. is it really true that if you put a lizard in the freezer and take it out a month later - as it thaws out it comes back to life?

i had other ones... but i can't remember them.

i know that they are probably lame - but every once in a while those questions pop back up and i've never found an answer for.

bscootin

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RE: Questions That Haunt Me - 6/19/2008 8:21:51 PM

Termyn8or

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This one's for the trekkies.

When Captain Kirk flies into the neutral zone, and five Romulan ships show up all the sudden, weren't they there first ? I thought it was a neutral zone.

I mean the Enterprise would go one foot into the neutral zone and it seemed that all of the sudden there were five warships decloaking.

What gives here ?

T

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RE: Questions That Haunt Me - 6/19/2008 11:58:07 PM

bscootin

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for the trekkies...

which episode was it?

the romulans were probably doing something to break their peace treaty, and cloaked themselves in attempt to not get caught. but, when kirk's ship arrived, they felt like their right to privacy was violated so then they attempted to defend themselves.

OR

the romulans were in a large disagreement with kirk (of course you know kirk never stood down from a battle) and they knew where kirk was going and wanted to ambush him to try to defeat kirk and his crew. (fat chance, but anyways.)

though, all the races of species that wanted to defeat the uss enterprise - (in the first star trek) never figured out how to keep cloaked and send the most powerful surge that would just make the ship blow up. i guess all the species just wanted to play cat n mouse... thinking they'd win - but it's the cat n mouse games/fights/and battles that always made kirk win. thus the reason for him being the star of that series of star trek. LOL

all the other star treks - the other species got smarter and tried even harder to destroy the uss enterprise, but by then the uss enterprise has had so many "upgrades" that it just became the highest class of all the star ships (that is, except for the moments Q came on board - then nothing was even as high as second grade, then when the borge showed up - they used the new technology to make their ship stronger, of which was beneficial to eventually defeating the borge leaving 7 of 9 un-affected until they helped bring back her human memories.)

but, back to the original star trek and the ambush that was previously asked...

romulans constantly tried to overstep their bounderies with kirk, funny how the different species acted in so many different ways in having a gathered hatred for kirk except the vulcans... of which the vulcans just looked at humans as shameful and emotional creatures. the vulcans didn't hate the human race - but rather tolerated the human race, because the human race - their behavior was always IRRATIONAL.

the only thing that really interests me the most of all - is, if it's irrational for vulcans to have emotional responses - how'd they have sex? LOL

bscootin

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