RE: Virginity issue

RE: Virginity issue (Full Version)

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Wildfleurs -> RE: Virginity issue (6/9/2008 8:00:22 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: boundinside Now for those of you that have seen my profile or that I have talked to, I have made it no secret that I am a virgin. My question is, does me being a virgin have any kind of impact on how people would approach or respond to me? Please don't limit this to the lifestyle itself, apply this to the vanilla life to. When I first got into the scene I was a virgin and while I think it did impact how people approached me, more improtantly it impacted how I approached things - I was definitely cautious and took time to learn before I did any playing. By the time I felt (relatively) comfortable in the scene I didn't have any more emotional attachment to retaining my virginity so after a little while I lost my virginity to a dom I was seeing. But overall it may make you not appealing for some people - I'm not sure I'd be interested in a virgin (not that I'm looking, I'm just saying) and I know that some dominants prefer a submissive with some sexual experience. C~

Dnomyar -> RE: Virginity issue (6/9/2008 8:02:35 AM)
abcbsex tell your girlfriend to advertise that she is bi and then she will have just as many women wanting to have sex with her. It isn't just a guy thing.

abcbsex -> RE: Virginity issue (6/9/2008 10:35:49 AM)
oh I know it isn't just the guy's problem in her relationships, I think SHE'S just fixated on it so much that that's how she assumes the guys are. And I've tried putting some bisexual thoughts in her mind, as I find her attractive, but she was having none of it, unfortunately. :P

FRSguy -> RE: Virginity issue (6/9/2008 11:35:20 AM)
I myself will have nothing to do with Virgins other than talk and if I meet one online I wont get involved in any kind of one on one sex conversations. Whatever kind of journey a virgin is on... I want nothing to do with it.

Sandyshores29718 -> RE: Virginity issue (6/9/2008 12:14:42 PM)
fast reply Personally i wont date someone that is a virgin. Now, i see nothing wrong with being a virgin and respect someone that is, but for me thats a no go. shrug Like i said thats me and not everyone is that way. There are some that the idea of being someones first is a major turn on and kinda a fetish. Don't worry a good couple is like a key and lock. You just have to find the right fit. :) Good luck.

flower2007 -> RE: Virginity issue (6/9/2008 3:52:45 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: boundinside Now for those of you that have seen my profile or that I have talked to, I have made it no secret that I am a virgin. My question is, does me being a virgin have any kind of impact on how people would approach or respond to me? Please don't limit this to the lifestyle itself, apply this to the vanilla life to. My profile says the same thing, and I think it has had an impact on how people reply......they've all been very polite and nice! I've never had anyone send attacking emails because of it. I'd never put the same information on a vanilla dating site or bring it up too early with someone I met in real life, though.

MissMagnolia -> RE: Virginity issue (6/9/2008 4:33:18 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Dnomyar Im like a virgin. I even have those big ass nipple cones. Well Raymond my love, I think we really need to see a photo of you in your nipple cones. For proof, ya know? Not that I don't trust you, just I want to see, ya know?

MstrVik -> RE: Virginity issue (6/9/2008 5:20:54 PM)
Being a virgin is just one aspect of who you are. Generally speaking, people will respond to you as a whole person, not just to one part of you - though to some just that aspect you mention may mean more than to others. But so it is with lots of things; every aspect is weighed against the others as we try to get an idea of someone else. Though it's a good thing to be open about it, it's also a good idea not to make it an issue - put as much emphasis on everything else that you are. I'm sure there's plenty more for you to convey that could give a better picture of yourself than just that simple word. Best of luck!

wideeyedinnocent -> RE: Virginity issue (6/10/2008 6:07:36 PM)
I consider myself a virgin, and in most of my vanilla relationships the issue was not that I hadn't had sex, but that I wasn't willing to. However, I can say that some of them did see me as a conquest. Friends who don't know a lot about my sexuality or my involvement in bdsm either tease me about it or applaud it. My experience in the bdsm world is pretty much limited to my current Partners and some friends, who appreciate my virginity as a part of who I am.

pinksugarsub -> RE: Virginity issue (6/10/2008 9:50:10 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: boundinside Now for those of you that have seen my profile or that I have talked to, I have made it no secret that I am a virgin. My question is, does me being a virgin have any kind of impact on how people would approach or respond to me? Please don't limit this to the lifestyle itself, apply this to the vanilla life to. Maybe it would, boundinside, but W/who cares? Take care of yourself and when you finally decide to lose your virginity, assure yourself as best you can of a positive experience. pinksugarsub

DarkVictory -> RE: Virginity issue (6/10/2008 11:21:16 PM)
May the divine FSM protect us from virgins. Jeez. Dangerous, drama queeny, angsty about simple biology. That, and they just can't fuck to save their lives.

figment -> RE: Virginity issue (6/10/2008 11:37:11 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DarkVictory May the divine FSM protect us from virgins. Jeez. Dangerous, drama queeny, angsty about simple biology. That, and they just can't fuck to save their lives. Mean, sarcastic, uncalled for comment that I found funny as hell and spat my mouthful of lemonade over my keyboard. hehe

Msagain -> RE: Virginity issue (6/10/2008 11:54:44 PM)
I do not see it as an issue as some relatiosnhips are not all about sex, they focus more on the dominance and training. But sooner or later the virginity does have to go as the relatiosnhip becomes deeper.

chastitybelt -> RE: Virginity issue (7/2/2008 4:19:27 AM)
Being a virgin shouldn't be an BDSM issue and people need to understand that there are many reason why some adult people over 21 are still virgin. Some adult virgins are waiting for the the right person, some virgins are waiting for marriage and some are asexual virgin and never will have intercourse.. me,i'm a 30 something virgin domme

RavenMuse -> RE: Virginity issue (7/2/2008 4:40:42 AM)
I know in Our culture the whole virginity thing is 'supposed' to be something appealing.... not to Me it isn't. It means someone who isn't likely to know what they want because they have no real experience to assess those wants on. They ain't going to have a grounded opinion of what they can do or what they are compatable with... they have nothing to compair with. IF, and it is a big if, everything else about the person felt right and We got on amazingly well and her submission draw Me to take it up... than I would take up the responcibility of putting the work in to get her over the DISADVANTAGE that total lack of experience means... otherwise, thanks but no thanks.

candystripper -> RE: Virginity issue (7/2/2008 4:46:23 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: boundinside Now for those of you that have seen my profile or that I have talked to, I have made it no secret that I am a virgin. My question is, does me being a virgin have any kind of impact on how people would approach or respond to me? Please don't limit this to the lifestyle itself, apply this to the vanilla life to. boundinside, the intimate facts of your life are just that -- intimate -- why would you broadcast any of them for a bunch of people you don't know to pass judgment on you? 20 is not an unusual age for a man to remain a virgin. So you weren't laid in high school? So what? You don't say why you've chosen not to have sex -- or whether you've had tons of sex but just never had intercourse -- and without knowing the 'backstory' I can't comment on whether what you're doing is destructive or constructive. And you don't know me -- so what use is my opinion anyway? I don't approach people based primarially on their sexual identity (of any stripe, including D/s). I like who I like; usually bright, witty, well-read characters who keep me laughing and tell me when I'm wrong. Regardless, being a virgin is a small part of who you are and anyone who can't see past that and get to know you is just saving you some agro, IMO. candystripper

cjan -> RE: Virginity issue (7/2/2008 6:26:01 AM)
OP, you're a virvgin, isn't that special...

CreativeDominant -> RE: Virginity issue (7/2/2008 7:53:21 AM)
Personally, I never found anything all that appealing about virginity. No, I didn't want a partner who'd had way too many previous partners (and no, I don't have a specific number in mind and it doesn't really matter, does it?) but the whole idea of "breaking the cherry" and all the aftermath that went with it when I was coming up was a wholllllllllllllllllllllllle lot of hassle for one experience. I've broken one cherry and that was in a long-term relationship with a partner who was ready for it. We'd done a lot of nights of foreplay and she was ready...thank God. We stayed together another year after the experience and remain friends today 33 years later. At my age now, I don't want to have to deal with virgins nor do I want to have to deal with someone with so much experience that they have become jaded but other than that, there are so many other facets of the person that draws me to them in the first place. Their sexual experience or lack of it comes lower down the list than their interest in a sexual life.

fluffyswitch -> RE: Virginity issue (7/2/2008 7:56:31 AM)
it's one of those things that's going to vary from person to person. some people like it, they think it's a thrill, other people think it's a turn off because they see it as being some sort of immaturity. i became sexually active late for a variety of reasons so i know the feeling. it's a matter of finding the person who won't fnd it a flaw.

StrangerinBlack -> RE: Virginity issue (7/2/2008 11:11:48 AM)
I lost my virginity fairly late. (A year or two before I began to scene). The only real difference I have noticed is that I now have much less paranoia and anxiety around sex , and that I am able to give and receive clear sexual signals with greater ease. You will most likely feel a lot better when you get over it, just because you don't have to obsess all the time about when it will happen or if you have what it takes (you do).

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