Georgia state trooper (Full Version)

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ominousdominus -> Georgia state trooper (6/9/2008 5:58:45 PM)

A Georgia State Trooper pulled a car over on I-95 about 2 miles south of the Georgia/South Carolina state line.

When the Trooper asked the driver why he was speeding, the driver answered that he was a magician and a juggler and he was on his way to Savannah to do a show that night at the Shrine Circus and didn't want to be late.

The Trooper told the driver he was fascinated by juggling, and if the driver would do a little juggling for him that he wouldn't give him a ticket.

The driver told the Trooper that he had sent all of his equipment on ahead and didn't have anything to juggle.

The Trooper told him that he had some flares in the trunk of his patrol car and asked if he could juggle them. The juggler stated that he could, so the Trooper got three flares, lit them and handed them to the juggler.

While the man was doing his juggling act, a car pulled in behind the patrol car.

A drunk good old boy, from S.C., got out and watched the performance briefly, he then went over to the patrol car, opened the rear door and got in. The Trooper observed him doing this and went over to the patrol car, opened the door and asked the drunk what he thought he was doing.

The drunk replied, "You might as well take my ass to jail, cause there's no way in hell I can pass that test."





GreedyTop -> RE: Georgia state trooper (6/9/2008 6:07:57 PM)

LMAO!!!




Alumbrado -> RE: Georgia state trooper (6/9/2008 7:16:00 PM)

[:D]




darchChylde -> RE: Georgia state trooper (6/9/2008 7:44:18 PM)

Funny, but please; don't confuse me by making jokes about Georgia State Troopers without pointing out what inbred, ignorant asses they are.  Also, a mention of speedtraps in Waverly Hall would be much appreciated.

Yes, it has been twelve years since i was in Georgia; and no, i'm not bitter.  Nope, not at all.




Lynnxz -> RE: Georgia state trooper (6/9/2008 7:48:07 PM)

Pft, you have to master the unbuttoned top buttons, lip trembling, puppydog eye look darch.

Works every time.




ominousdominus -> RE: Georgia state trooper (6/9/2008 8:22:32 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: darchChylde

Funny, but please; don't confuse me by making jokes about Georgia State Troopers without pointing out what inbred, ignorant asses they are.  Also, a mention of speedtraps in Waverly Hall would be much appreciated.

Yes, it has been twelve years since i was in Georgia; and no, i'm not bitter.  Nope, not at all.



LOL "I'm not bitter".......NO, I can tell how you've really gotten over that......




darchChylde -> RE: Georgia state trooper (6/9/2008 8:52:13 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

Pft, you have to master the unbuttoned top buttons, lip trembling, puppydog eye look darch.

Works every time.



i did, but he checked out my pubes; dragged me into the woods and did horrible, horrible things to me.




Lynnxz -> RE: Georgia state trooper (6/9/2008 8:53:09 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: darchChylde

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

Pft, you have to master the unbuttoned top buttons, lip trembling, puppydog eye look darch.

Works every time.



i did, but he checked out my pubes; dragged me into the woods and did horrible, horrible things to me.



Lmfao... O god....




GreedyTop -> RE: Georgia state trooper (6/9/2008 10:09:43 PM)

details, Darch...




Icarys -> RE: Georgia state trooper (6/9/2008 10:16:55 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ominousdominus

A Georgia State Trooper pulled a car over on I-95 about 2 miles south of the Georgia/South Carolina state line.

When the Trooper asked the driver why he was speeding, the driver answered that he was a magician and a juggler and he was on his way to Savannah to do a show that night at the Shrine Circus and didn't want to be late.

The Trooper told the driver he was fascinated by juggling, and if the driver would do a little juggling for him that he wouldn't give him a ticket.

The driver told the Trooper that he had sent all of his equipment on ahead and didn't have anything to juggle.

The Trooper told him that he had some flares in the trunk of his patrol car and asked if he could juggle them. The juggler stated that he could, so the Trooper got three flares, lit them and handed them to the juggler.

While the man was doing his juggling act, a car pulled in behind the patrol car.

A drunk good old boy, from S.C., got out and watched the performance briefly, he then went over to the patrol car, opened the rear door and got in. The Trooper observed him doing this and went over to the patrol car, opened the door and asked the drunk what he thought he was doing.

The drunk replied, "You might as well take my ass to jail, cause there's no way in hell I can pass that test."



too funny.




Gwynvyd -> RE: Georgia state trooper (6/10/2008 4:08:25 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: darchChylde

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

Pft, you have to master the unbuttoned top buttons, lip trembling, puppydog eye look darch.

Works every time.



i did, but he checked out my pubes; dragged me into the woods and did horrible, horrible things to me.



Did he ask you to squeal like a pig?

Sorry I had ta...
 


Gwyn




HandSolo -> RE: Georgia state trooper (6/10/2008 6:13:32 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: darchChylde

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

Pft, you have to master the unbuttoned top buttons, lip trembling, puppydog eye look darch.

Works every time.



i did, but he checked out my pubes; dragged me into the woods and did horrible, horrible things to me.



Is it that he didn't come back for seconds that bothered you?[:D]




darchChylde -> RE: Georgia state trooper (6/10/2008 6:47:15 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: HandSolo

Is it that he didn't come back for seconds that bothered you?[:D]



Well, well; he said he'd call me.  It's been twelve years...




Gwynvyd -> RE: Georgia state trooper (6/10/2008 6:53:55 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: darchChylde

quote:

ORIGINAL: HandSolo

Is it that he didn't come back for seconds that bothered you?[:D]



Well, well; he said he'd call me.  It's been twelve years...



Damn shame.. see *I* would have at least left a voice mail or somethin'....

*chuckles*

Gwyn




ominousdominus -> RE: Georgia state trooper (6/10/2008 7:02:14 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: darchChylde

quote:

ORIGINAL: HandSolo

Is it that he didn't come back for seconds that bothered you?[:D]



Well, well; he said he'd call me.  It's been twelve years...



That lying son of a bitch......LOL




Saratov -> RE: Georgia state trooper (6/11/2008 9:40:35 AM)

edited, posted in wrong place. [:-]




GimpinDenial -> RE: Georgia state trooper (6/11/2008 10:47:46 AM)

you know, Darchs story is getting better then the original post.......
<sits back and lurks>




darchChylde -> RE: Georgia state trooper (6/11/2008 12:01:05 PM)

Ok, i'll come clean.  i've never been molested by an officer (though i've fantasized about it, a woman in a stereotypically male uniforrm is just hot to me) in Georgia or any other state.  The only time that i've ever even came close to a ticket was getting pulled over on my Fatboy because i was riding down a deserted stretch of highway about 30 miles an hour while my petite wife was "riding" me (in a manner not generally approved by the DMV).

The brief squelch of siren came behind us and we slowly pulled over.  Up walks an absolute babe, a tall and well stacked brunette whose uniform was snug in all the right places, with a huge grin on her face under those huge shades they all have.  She told us to get off the bike, and when i reached down to discretely put myself back in my jeans; she shakes her head and simply says "No, I said get off the bike; now."  My wife was able to climb off while keeping her skirt covering her parts, but i was a full attention and out there for all the world to see.

The officer never actually looks at me and starts to check out my bike, saying "Ok, you can put it away now.".  When she did come back to us, she starts to give us a lecture about reckless driving and such.  Finally, she tells me that she could forget the whole thing if she could ride my bike a bit.

After happily agreeing, my wife and i stood by her unit for about 5 minutes; blushing and giggling the entire time while waiting for the officer to return.  She did, lowered her shades and says "That was an incredible ride." while winking at my wife; got back in her car and drove away.




MakeMeSmile4U -> RE: Georgia state trooper (6/11/2008 12:11:49 PM)

*whew* ... need some ice and a fan now....




HypnoticDan -> RE: Georgia state trooper (6/12/2008 11:12:31 AM)

"fine, but I drive."  ;)




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