different ways to address a submissive

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KindLadyGrey -> different ways to address a submissive (6/13/2008 10:35:59 AM)
I love the current thread on different ways to address a Domme. There were a lot of really good suggestions made, some of which were really original. There have been other threads on that topic, but I haven't seen so many original and really thoughtfully lovely replies on it before. I gravitate toward threads with kawaii value, so here's another: Let's do it the other way around. How do you address your submissive? I've heard boy, puppy, pet, and similar things. There seem to be a lot of different ways to address different sorts of people in this lifestyle. What's your favorite? What do you call your submissive? What do you generally call other submissives you meet until a preferred mode of address is established? I tend to address unattached male submissives as boy, and unattached female submissives as sweetheart. I'm quite sexist, actually, although it isn't premeditated. If there are objections to those modes of address I don't insist on them, but they tend to be my defaults when meeting a new person in a submissive context.

aidan -> RE: different ways to address a submissive (6/13/2008 10:52:33 AM)
Mistress calls me a variety of things during play, but the most common day-to-day thing is "boykin". It doesn't mean anything, just a cute nickname that She started using when we first started talking to each other. I love it because of it's "kawaii value", and because it's something that nobody else is called and She came up with just for me. She also refers to me as Her rogue, because...well, a lot of reasons, two of which are my impish sense of humor and affinity for knives. grins slyly

ThundersCry -> RE: different ways to address a submissive (6/13/2008 11:22:34 AM)
whore....works.

faerytattoodgirl -> RE: different ways to address a submissive (6/13/2008 11:25:39 AM)
that'll be $150 pig...pay up.. [8\|]

KindLadyGrey -> RE: different ways to address a submissive (6/13/2008 11:28:19 AM)
quote: Thunders Cry said. . . whore. . .works. My whore doesn't. She's fuckin' lazy. I don't even know why I keep the bitch on the payroll ;) And aiden, that's exactly the sort of personalized thing I'm talking about and was hoping people would share on this thread. Boykin, so cute! (Also, it reminds me I owe you $20. . crap, where was that other thread again. . .)

tsatske -> RE: different ways to address a submissive (6/13/2008 11:33:37 AM)
quote: I tend to address unattached male submissives as boy, and unattached female submissives as sweetheart. I'm quite sexist, actually, although it isn't premeditated. If there are objections to those modes of address I don't insist on them, but they tend to be my defaults when meeting a new person in a submissive context. I'm just curious - if you met an unattached (or attached but not to you) Black submissive male, would you call him boy? Just wondering because, on the one hand, i think boy has some strong positive connotations in the kink world, and, otoh, some strong negitive conotations in the African American culture.

KindLadyGrey -> RE: different ways to address a submissive (6/13/2008 11:42:58 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: tsatske quote: I tend to address unattached male submissives as boy, and unattached female submissives as sweetheart. I'm quite sexist, actually, although it isn't premeditated. If there are objections to those modes of address I don't insist on them, but they tend to be my defaults when meeting a new person in a submissive context. I'm just curious - if you met an unattached (or attached but not to you) Black submissive male, would you call him boy? Just wondering because, on the one hand, i think boy has some strong positive connotations in the kink world, and, otoh, some strong negitive conotations in the African American culture. Holy crap, I never even thought about that. boy has such a totally different connotation in this lifestyle. I have called black submissive men "boy" before. Oh god, I hope they were not terribly insulted. [sm=ofcourse.gif] I'll definitely think twice before doing that again. Maybe sweetheart can just be universal. I call the boys that too sometimes when I'm in a good mood :)

DominantJenny -> RE: different ways to address a submissive (6/13/2008 12:06:16 PM)
I call mine slaveboy most of the time, as well as slut, etc, when I feel like it. I don't call others anything based on their D/s status...I will refer to people that I like as sweetheart, sweetie, hon, etc, if I don't think they'll be offended. (Though I'm sometimes wrong. pout)

ThundersCry -> RE: different ways to address a submissive (6/13/2008 12:13:11 PM)
Pig works as...well... As for the 150 bones... Come and get...it <g>

Madame4a -> RE: different ways to address a submissive (6/13/2008 12:35:44 PM)
boy mine darling boy

darchChylde -> RE: different ways to address a submissive (6/13/2008 12:42:56 PM)
Ma'am generally just calls me oren; though occasionally "my pet", which gives a very warm feeling even though most often it's said in reference to me as opposed as to me. She also sometimes refers to me as "the boychild", which i kind of like for the cuteness factor. Most often, online atleast; She simply calls me sweets.

Wheldrake -> RE: different ways to address a submissive (6/13/2008 1:06:20 PM)
Foreign languages can offer some interesting possibilities in this context. My Mistress often calls me "hamba", which apparently means "slave" in her native language (Malay). At least, that's what she's always told me it means - I've never looked it up, so I hope it's not actually the Malay word for "imbecile" or "cesspool". I call her "puan" in return, which is more or less like calling her "ma'am". In any case, it comes in handy that we can call each other "puan" and "hamba" in the middle of a crowd of English or Chinese speakers (I live in Beijing) without anyone suspecting that they're something other than terms of endearment.

khantengri -> RE: different ways to address a submissive (6/13/2008 2:42:31 PM)
I call my submissive 'creature' and 'pet, as well as just 'Josh' or 'Joshy'. I prefer to call other submissives by their first name, or by another personal nickname of theirs.

Skully7000 -> RE: different ways to address a submissive (6/13/2008 3:27:09 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: tsatske quote: I tend to address unattached male submissives as boy, and unattached female submissives as sweetheart. I'm quite sexist, actually, although it isn't premeditated. If there are objections to those modes of address I don't insist on them, but they tend to be my defaults when meeting a new person in a submissive context. I'm just curious - if you met an unattached (or attached but not to you) Black submissive male, would you call him boy? Just wondering because, on the one hand, i think boy has some strong positive connotations in the kink world, and, otoh, some strong negitive conotations in the African American culture. Whats wrong with asking him if he minds it ?(especially if you are someone who uses "boy" as a default) There without getting into the whole "raceplay" discussion I think there are some black men who would like it BECAUSE of how wrong it is...yet it still might not have the same emotional impact as some "stronger" words. then again they may just be OK with it because they accept its implication in this scene and are able to seperate it from other implied meanings... or they may just tell you its a hard limit. The point is "just ask" Personally: Slut is my first choice... Whore is my second. Bitch(for a guy)/DirtyGirl (for a woman) are my third choices... my tone of voice combined with these words seem to get a good reation. In the end though that is what its all about for me... which word will trigger the best reaction within that person. Cheers Skully

aidan -> RE: different ways to address a submissive (6/13/2008 3:49:14 PM)
I always found it charming when a Domme called me "boy" or "sweetheart" or something similar when I was free-roaming.

tsatske -> RE: different ways to address a submissive (6/13/2008 5:33:40 PM)
quote: Whats wrong with asking him if he minds it ?(especially if you are someone who uses "boy" as a default) There without getting into the whole "raceplay" discussion I think there are some black men who would like it BECAUSE of how wrong it is...yet it still might not have the same emotional impact as some "stronger" words. then again they may just be OK with it because they accept its implication in this scene and are able to seperate it from other implied meanings... or they may just tell you its a hard limit. The point is "just ask" absolutely. I have known people, even played with people, who liked raceplay. asking is always the best answer. but if no one ever points out the possiblities to think through, then someone might not think of asking. that's the only reason i brought it into the conversation. Asking works. :)

PsyVamp -> RE: different ways to address a submissive (6/13/2008 7:16:09 PM)
My pet I call wolf, or adrian, or pup... brat... sweets.. sometimes I call him "baby" and at that point he accuses me of forgetting his name (I once said "I just call all guys "baby" and this way nobody gets upset if I get a name wrong... I was half joking) Other submissives I refer to by the name used in the introduction. Lady Jag

MsLemon -> RE: different ways to address a submissive (6/13/2008 7:23:51 PM)
I call my husband/property my lug but when he's in his object headspace he's My Unit .. Unit 0821 to be exact. My girl is my mermaid beauty and the lug calls her j-nut (a special nick for her between them). When I'm feeling all mushy I call them both my loves.

PhoenixRed -> RE: different ways to address a submissive (6/13/2008 9:14:15 PM)
Hmmm. Well, I call most men "pup" when I meet them, whether they're older or younger than me. That name stuck with my sub because he has a "puppy" personality. My female switch is "sassy", because it fits her personality. My youngest sub is "kitten" because he has a kitten-type personality. I usually give slaves a new D/s name. I have them do a search for exotic and/or ethnic names that have some kind of symbolism or meaning and return a list of 4-6 names and their meanings to me. Then I choose. For my slave...he found the names donkar (Latin, means 'humble') and umi (African, means 'servant') - I made a contracted name out of these two to create a name that meant 'humble searvant'. His slave name is now "doumi" (pronounced "do-me")...he thought the double entendre was appropriate, as I did! lol I also call my subs sweetie, bitch or slut (if in the appropriate context), boy, etc. Whatever strikes me at the moment. hee hee

MaamJay -> RE: different ways to address a submissive (6/13/2008 9:24:16 PM)
I use pet and boy a lot, when I am feeling more emotionally attached to them it becomes My pet, or My boy which they generally love. I also use sweets, hon, honeybun, poppet and little one (especially effective when they are great big hulking critters!), darlin' boy, lovey ... yes I am just the affectionate type I guess! I tend to address people I've just met by the name given in the introduction or I ask if there's a nickname they prefer and then I will use that, otherwise, I will get generic and fall back on one or more of the above! My first hubby and a female work mate (who later became a good friend of Mine too) used to call each other serf-baby (for her) and Boss-baby (for him) ... that was cute and now I know about D/s, that could apply quite nicely! They used it cos she did all the work LOL! I am really liking boykin now though ... but I guess aidan might not want Us all to pinch it ... Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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