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RE: Help - 11/1/2005 1:08:48 PM   
theRose4U


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Joined: 8/22/2005
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quote:

I am in the military, giving inspections is no problem for me ;)


Just remember that DI's are not what most subs can tolerate especially right off the bat. If she is in her own element she may be a little more relaxed than you may be so take it slow. I am a firm believer in public meetings, safety calls and taking it slow especially if one or the other is a novice. I asked my new sub just this morning what he liked most about our meeting & he said the feeling that I genuinley cared about him & his well being, that I didn't initally force anything upon him just gave him ideas (conversation on pervertables), and that I allowed him to choose to make the steps in his submission slowly at first. We had been speaking for quite some time before meeting face to face but I still took things as if it was a first date. Just a thought

(in reply to NavyDDG54)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Help - 11/1/2005 1:14:31 PM   
pandoravampire


Posts: 374
Joined: 12/6/2004
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great story noah. And soooo true for me.

the taking of the wrist as opposed to a hand, feels awkward, my immediate response was to want to adjust the hold to a more comfy one, that i was prevented by a firmer grasp as i attempted this, was a first demo, that my will was not my own. Such a simple gesture, that i will always remember as THE first step.

Inspections: these are great, and neednt be naked. If you meet at a bar, cafe, restaurante. To be told to turn slowly around so that he may see how i have prepared for this visit, still clothed, had quite a impact, with racing thoughts that spun me out. "bloody cheek", "who does he think he is", "why am i just doing what he says", "this is so? exciting".

I seriously underestimated the power exchange, that somehow, never came across over the phone, internet etc. The sexual play thing, well, that was always gonna be great, but the small nuances, that spell D/s, like wrist holding, showing my dressed presentation in a public place, little things, that are so significant, they cannot be underestimated for either developing a power exchange, or maintaining one.

Good luck, i wish you a wonderful first meeting, full of excitement, as i know it will be.
pandora

(in reply to FangsNfeet)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Help - 11/1/2005 2:14:20 PM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
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quote:

I am a new Master and I am planning a first meeting with my slave, only I am running out of ideas to do, Does anyone have any ideas on what would be somethings to do on a first meeting?


I'd suggest a meeting in a very public place. Nothing more than chat, just the same as a vanilla date. Of course, I do have common sense and I do stay safe.

(in reply to NavyDDG54)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Help - 11/1/2005 2:49:24 PM   
NavyDDG54


Posts: 203
Joined: 1/10/2005
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Normally I would agree with you but she is in the Marine Corps, I think she can handle a Navy inspection

(in reply to theRose4U)
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RE: Help - 11/3/2005 4:22:31 PM   
windchymes


Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: FangsNfeet

Take things slow and confident. Keep your session easy with simple blindfolds, bondage, and spanking. Regardless as to how much you know or don't know, it's normally best for the both of you to start off with the basics so that trust can be formed between the both of you as you move on to more kinky things.

So remember to be confident and to not dish out anymore that you can't take yourself.


I have to agree here. A two-year fantasy is great, but when you meet in real life and get down to the nitty gritty, things can change in a heartbeat! She probably does think she wants to get right down to kinky business, but she's still female....she wants romance. We all do, in spite of how much we protest.

At least for your first night....I'd go heavy on the flowers, the wine (but not too much!), the candles, the dinner and dessert. I like the blindfold and gentle restraints idea, with maybe a feather, some Kama Sutra powder or nice massage oil. Maybe a very small crop or light paddle. Hell, you guys probably won't even get much past the blindfolds anyway, before you're going at it like bunnies in heat!

I'd wait until at least Day Two before diving into your magic bag of tricks.

quote:

We talked about that, but we have been talking for over 2 years and she wants to go right into it.



Too bad! You're the Dom, right? Make her wait....it'll make her even hotter!

Good luck, and be sure to fill us in on all the juicy details afterward!

windchymes

(in reply to FangsNfeet)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Help - 11/3/2005 4:27:33 PM   
mnottertail


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Joined: 11/3/2004
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So everybody got big expectations (and I aint even gonna get into the difference between squids and sucks) take her out to dinner and talk to her......get to know each other...........you about het up as she is boy!

you can fuck anytime.........the biggest deal in impressing someone is to be who you say you are and to be a nice and comfortable person........

TRUST.........start with basics

anyone here will tell you that the communicating is the bigger of the things.

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to windchymes)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Help - 11/3/2005 6:35:27 PM   
wipmebeetme100


Posts: 198
Joined: 7/31/2005
Status: offline
quote:

I am a new Master and I am planning a first meeting with my slave, only I am running out of ideas to do, Does anyone have any ideas on what would be somethings to do on a first meeting?


I am a very service based slave, and something that is very important to me upon initially meeting someone, is learning their preferences. How they like their coffee, do they like lemon in their iced tea, etc. Protocol is also very important to me...i like to know from the beginning what the expectations are as far as...my use of furniture, do i need to wait to begin eating until told, how to address him.

It is helpful to know what anothers expectations of you are....and maybe your new slave would appreciate you taking the time to go over this with her. It will certainly help to put her at ease.


cathy

_____________________________

Happiness is like peeing your pants: Everyone can see it, but only you can feel its warmth
~Unknown

(in reply to NavyDDG54)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Help - 11/17/2005 12:15:38 AM   
NavyDDG54


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Joined: 1/10/2005
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Thank you everyone for your help

(in reply to NavyDDG54)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Help - 11/17/2005 1:01:42 AM   
brightspot


Posts: 3052
Status: offline
quote:

I am a new Master and I am planning a first meeting with my slave, only I am running out of ideas to do, Does anyone have any ideas on what would be somethings to do on a first meeting?


If you haven't even met a slave yet and you have run out of idea's.
maybe you should not even seek until you have your chit together???


*Brightspot

_____________________________

"Comedy is NOT Pretty!" ~Peter Nelson

But..."May at Least One person have a sense of Humor!" ~KML.

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(in reply to NavyDDG54)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Help - 11/17/2005 3:03:44 AM   
Marquisd


Posts: 61
Joined: 11/1/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: NavyDDG54

I am a new Master and I am planning a first meeting with my slave, only I am running out of ideas to do, Does anyone have any ideas on what would be somethings to do on a first meeting?


Well first of all good luck to you on your journey.

I recommend that you do not play at all the first meeting. It takes the pressure off of both of you and you actually get to spend time with the real person that you want to get to know well before playing.

Show her/him really the person you are and what interest you about them. Ask open ended questions so they can tell about themselves with more than yes or no answers.

welcome to your own personal journey

cheers

Marquisd

_____________________________

Relationships develop at the speed of trust

"Official Sadist and Dom of the 2010 Winter Games"

(in reply to NavyDDG54)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Help - 11/17/2005 3:57:05 AM   
ExistentialSteel


Posts: 676
Joined: 1/18/2005
Status: offline
Lots of good advice here. Noah's detailed and informative post gives you much insight into the whole process. My advice is to compartmentalize things. Don't always be on. Go out and have some fun together. Good luck.

_____________________________

For those who are like Roman Candles leaving bright trails in the night sky while the crowd watches until the dark blue center light bursts into magnificent colors and the crowd goes, ahhhhhhhhhh.

(in reply to NavyDDG54)
Profile   Post #: 31
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