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TenderDom2k -> RE: Therapy and the Lifestyle (11/1/2005 7:22:21 PM)
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Wow, this is turning out to be a rather engaging thread. No hard feelings KittenWithaTwist. Like I already told someone who told me that the 1st time, in my own 1st round (yes there was another, and probably another one to come) of therapy, my therapist had been referred by someone she had gone to school with. This guy was my bud, a junior prof, a quadraplegic, and the lead singer for our band Idiots Blocking Traffic. When he had a big party, I freaked out that she might be there. So I totally relate.
Now, regarding DSM comment before: John Warren is on the money. Any "illness" is only one if it disturbs one's life enough to cause a disruption in function, within the domains of social, occupational, financial etc. The vast majority of the stuff I read hear don't sound like that at all. In fact, it's really what I wish more people were doing which is becoming more of a whole person and understanding themselves better.
Regarding John Money comment: I was an undergrad at Hopkins when Money was at the med school. I had a buddy who was a research assistant with him. Aside from my lack of respect for him for being stubborn in not accepting the evidence demonstrating that gender identity is NOT determined by parental rearing,
[ModEdit please read TOS]
Regarding reporting: Where I practice in the state of California, the reporting that is most strict is regarding minors and elderly. I don't see there being any problems with consensual acts, even branding or scarification. Which is not to say there aren't subs who aren't in a typically abusive-psych-trap relationship. But like Iron Bear so aptly stated, most of the time it relates to commonly seen issues not specific to BDSM.
Finally, re: KittenWithaTwist's post re: psychtx re: kink. It might open up an interesting thought space to explore. Not just in terms of the standard psych stuff of the meaning and connections of various cravings, tickles, turn ons, etc. But also to better define, crystallize and understand them. Example: One of my long term cases was, like most of my pts, someone with a traumatized childhood. Father suicide during 1st Oedipal stage. Mother's BF the hairdressor fondled pretending to teach her how to swim. Once the transference was deep enough she related erotic dreams mainly of rape. But though guided readings (e.g. Story of O), and linking various feelings arising from situations, and the cultural symbolism of things (e.g. medical stuff), she developed a better defined sense of what her 'kink world' was. The difficult thing was her BF was vanilla and needed some sessions to understand her needs. Whew!
The key thing for success and not some horror story, in my humble opinion, is the connection with the shrink (besides qualificaition, reliability, etc). The rule of thumb I give is 4 sessions to see if you click. If not, move on. If you don't have insurance (yes our health care system is completely broken) try a psychoanalytic institute. I might also suggest a university, but my guess is that they would be more strictly traditional in their approach than some of the analytic places that emphasize self psychology (my orientation), attachment theory, Bion, or more ?personal schools of thought.
Man, now I'm really blathering on. And no old Chinese men story yet.
TenderDom2k
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