RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (Full Version)

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Archer -> RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (6/19/2008 6:41:40 AM)

I don't have it in my profile/ nick etc, but I am often afforded the honorific of Master Archer by folks in the community.
Actually had my Master's Cover (Cap) presented to me by a group of my peers a couple years ago.
I think it took me about 6 years to go from being very uncomfortable with folks using the honorific to being able to humbly accept its use.




SirKaton -> RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (6/19/2008 6:47:15 AM)

These terms (Dom/me, Master) are designations, nothing more.  No one has to certify me to be a Dom no more than one has to certify a sub to be a sub.  It is simply what I am and it is reflected thru my actions and activities in this lifestyle that has some semblance of generally accepted practices and ideas as to what Dom/me or Master is.




cumulus -> RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (6/19/2008 8:13:54 AM)

I put 50 cents in the machine, and the marionette suddenly sprang to life, awash in blue and white light. Her words were barely audible as they crackled through the tiny speaker just above my head. "What is thy bidding, Master?"

After a short burst of music and some hissing, a small piece of paper protruded from a slot in the front of the machine. The puppet went limp and the lights went out. The fortune read, "Love is in your future."

At that moment, I knew I was a twoo Master.




IronBear -> RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (6/19/2008 9:02:37 AM)

What in intriguing and timely question. It is one I usually ask myself when I wee either Master, Sir or Lord as part of an online name. Like a number of the responces have indicated, it is probably used by people who are either not yet know to the on line community and thus have yet to gain a reoutation which would possibly show that they are a Master. I would immagine that a similar answer may be accorded to thoes Ladies who add Mistress to their names but I could well be wrong there.. However to be fair, sometimes when you register a name, you'll find that another had done so already and thus by addoi ng Master to your chosen name allows it to be used. I work on a simple principle when using the designation of Master: "Yes I am a Master but not your Master" if it is to be used as a form of address either on line or face to face along with as it shows in my Signature: "Iron Bear, Master of Bruin Cottage". (I even in some on line forums and on applicable documents use Rev. because I am an ordaned Pagan Priest)In passing it could be added that the use of the term Master outside the Kink arena, usually (antiquated though) applies to the son of a Squire, of of course a person who had earned that title as a Master of a Craft, Master of a Ship or Academically. Similarly Sir usually refers to a male who has been Knighted, and Lord usually refers to a Peer of the Realm (There are other areas where this honorific may be applicable too).. Most folks in this day and age don't really worry too much about these nicities outside the UK I have found..

Iron Bear
(Incorrigible, irrepressible and irreverent)
Master of Bruin Cottage
(A Victorian Lifestyle poly home)

The Moving Finger writes; and, having writ,
Moves on: nor all your Piety nor Wit
Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line,
Nor all your Tears wash out a Word of it.


Omar Khayyam 1048 CE to 1123 CE (Persian Mathematician, Scientist, Astronomer, Philosopher & Poet).






FRSguy -> RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (6/19/2008 10:36:28 AM)

When it comes to me personaly I use it on hear in order to describe my roll within a dynamic.  Other than that my sub has designated me as her Master / Sir / Dom ... Somehow I think if I told my assistant at work to start calling me "MASTER" she would have difficulty in it...LOL.  To date I cant find it anywhere on my drivers license or tax mail.  In short in social situations it prevents others from getting seriously injured if they attempt to use floggers ect on me....LOL




LydiaLuv -> RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (6/19/2008 10:47:12 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: InsaenPleasures

I think it is a good question. The counter or opposite question is how much experience does a sub need before putting sub in the name? The answer I think is none.  The same holds true for Dominants I would think. You really do not need experience, you are expressing who you are or want to be.



I honestly do not think I would want to start a d/s relationship with someone who has no experience or training as a dom.  Yes, you can be a dom by nature or expression or thought.  Just as a sub is trained, so to can a dom.  My "Master" was trained and has many years experience.  After being with him 5 months, I now call him Master.




KLRDan -> RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (6/19/2008 10:51:48 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: WhiteFox77

It's a designation, not a rank. 



Exactly. Nothing more should be required for the title "dominant" than a desire to dominate. Whether you're any good at it, or whether you're ethical, or whether you even have a conscience, are separate questions entirely. (Ted Bundy was unquestionably dominant.) It's for this reason that I cringe at the phrase "real dominant," and all its relatives. A person may pretend to have the ability to dominate well, but it's difficult to imagine anyone pretending to want to dominate at all. And the desire is all that should be necessary for the title.

I think the word "master" should be treated a little differently. It has two BDSM-relevant definitions that I can think of: it either means you've attained an extremely high level of skill--in which case it is a statement of rank--or it means you own a person, or an animal. A six-year-old kid who owns a dog is that dog's master. An 18-year-old guy who owns a woman is that woman's master. Notice there's no implication that the kid is any good at dog training or the 18-year-old is any good at woman training. All that's being stated is that ownership exists.

With that out of the way, I do get the impression that most guys who put "master" in their handles are making a claim to skill, and I tend to be very suspicious of them. People who are really that good at anything tend to let others do the talking for them. It's hard to imagine Rickson Gracie calling himself "JiuJitsuMaster96", or Steven Hawking adopting "SuperCosmologist65".




Darkeyes83 -> RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (6/19/2008 11:41:37 AM)

KLRDan beat me to clarifying what my something from my original statement.  The Dom as a title isn't nearly implicit(I think that's the word I want to use) to me as when I see Master.

As several people have mentioned, Dom is much less formal than Master.  When I think Master, I think Master Mechanics, Master Tattoo Artists, I think of Master Goldsmiths or Master Electricians, people who have had to seriously toil to get to where they are. I think  people who are truly at the Top of the Top, the creme de la creme, if you will. 

The funny thing about people like that, though, is that their reputation generally proceeds them, and they don't dawn it for themselves, so much as it's given to them.  I know there's no officiating committee(unless you include social groups) that says 'you've been in for 10yrs, put in over 4000hours of training, and when you pick up a whip I simultaneously get hard and feel a tear roll down my cheek. You, Sir, have finally met the requirements to get the title of Master. Your sportcoat will be arriving from the shop in 4-6weeks.'

Now, I know that those things can be said about people, but when they get to that point, it's more or less unsaid, is it not?

I think I'm babbling out my ass now(neat trick, ain't it?) I didn't realize this post would stir up as much attention as it has. I just wanted to ask that question, because it's something that had been itching at me for sometime(one of those itches you can't reach with a backscratcher, either) Not bad, for a first post, huh?




Archer -> RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (6/19/2008 11:46:37 AM)

LOL you mentioned th sportcoat and got me thinking about that fantasy scne I swear someday I'm gonna do.

Girl up on cross, Enter wearing green sport coat with a golf bag and proceed to beating the girl with golf clubs, LOL.
And then it'll be time to work on the short game and start practicing putting, the hole should be obvious. LOL




Darkeyes83 -> RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (6/19/2008 12:13:36 PM)

That. would be. HILARIOUS. Why a green sportcoat, though?(Is that the color they give golfers who win the masters?)




IronBear -> RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (6/19/2008 12:41:56 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: KLRDan

quote:

ORIGINAL: WhiteFox77

It's a designation, not a rank. 



Exactly. Nothing more should be required for the title "dominant" than a desire to dominate. Whether you're any good at it, or whether you're ethical, or whether you even have a conscience, are separate questions entirely. (Ted Bundy was unquestionably dominant.) It's for this reason that I cringe at the phrase "real dominant," and all its relatives. A person may pretend to have the ability to dominate well, but it's difficult to imagine anyone pretending to want to dominate at all. And the desire is all that should be necessary for the title.

I think the word "master" should be treated a little differently. It has two BDSM-relevant definitions that I can think of: it either means you've attained an extremely high level of skill--in which case it is a statement of rank--or it means you own a person, or an animal. A six-year-old kid who owns a dog is that dog's master. An 18-year-old guy who owns a woman is that woman's master. Notice there's no implication that the kid is any good at dog training or the 18-year-old is any good at woman training. All that's being stated is that ownership exists.

With that out of the way, I do get the impression that most guys who put "master" in their handles are making a claim to skill, and I tend to be very suspicious of them. People who are really that good at anything tend to let others do the talking for them. It's hard to imagine Rickson Gracie calling himself "JiuJitsuMaster96", or Steven Hawking adopting "SuperCosmologist65".


Regarding WhiteFox's comment. You are correct when it comes to kink or similar lifestyles, but I doubt if your hear any Master Sgt or Master Chief agree what in their case it is just a designation as it is legaly part of the rank..

KLRDan, there is another area in this lifestyle in which Master is used and that is in the Gorean Loifestyle.
  1. Any Gorean Freeman who owns a slave is accorded automatically the title Master.
  2. All slaves will address every Gorean freeman be he their owner or not, as Master.
Both are customs and hold no relevance outside the Gorean Lidfestyle nor are non Gorean slaves expected to address them as Master unless told to do so by their owners.

Any male who heads a home is entitled to be refered to as Master in anycase, that to is both customary in some societies and is good, but old fashion, manners.

Iron Bear
(Incorrigible, irrepressible and irreverent)
Master of Bruin Cottage
(A Victorian Lifestyle poly home)

The Moving Finger writes; and, having writ,
Moves on: nor all your Piety nor Wit
Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line,
Nor all your Tears wash out a Word of it.


Omar Khayyam 1048 CE to 1123 CE (Persian Mathematician, Scientist, Astronomer, Philosopher & Poet).






Archer -> RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (6/19/2008 1:00:22 PM)

Yes it is.




DesFIP -> RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (6/19/2008 1:05:51 PM)

I think people can put titles in for a myriad of reasons. To make themselves sound more appealing and experienced. But also because they can assume that that's the appropriate way to introduce themselves, to be identified on the correct side of the slash.

I do remember discussing this on another board one time with a lord something who admitted he now found it pretentious, but since he was known by that title he felt unable to change it.




blackrosegoddess -> RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (6/19/2008 1:21:41 PM)

No one told me I was a dom. I just knew. I like things my way, yet am willing to hear what the other person has to say about things. Even if I dont do what they want or listen to thier suggestions.  I have always had a very over powering personality, but am also polite as well. I would think it would be simular for the male counterparts to my role.




InsaenPleasures -> RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (6/19/2008 2:03:47 PM)

I think part of the problem is that in this lifestyle the word Master is afforded a great deal of prestige, even more than Dom/me. At the same time, there is no respectful / powerful sounding word for “Dominant/Master in training”

To borrow from Star Wars, a Padawan is not a submissive to his or her Jedi Master (though clearly Padawans do fulfill some of that role) but in fact a potential Master in training.  I realize the analogy is not exact. The point is, there is no term for the mid point between the normal and the Master that sounds respectful enough that a Dom/Master in training would feel comfortable in taking it.  Also, there is not a great deal of respect given to those learning the art of Dominance even though we all had to learn to some extent.

Like many terms their overuse whether rightly or wrongly,  has watered down the words Dominant and Master.

My opinion however, is that only you can decide when you are a Master of whatever it is your doing. Others can accord the term or not, but you have to be the one comfortable with it.
Logan




Darkeyes83 -> RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (6/19/2008 2:19:29 PM)

On the lines of what Logan is saying(btw, he could be twins with a buddy of mine, scary), some of those that could be considered 'in-betweeners'(Yes, this includes myself, for I have but just recently started along this trail, though I've been researching it and considering it, and feeling it, for a solid decade) wouldn't mind not having just the Dom(which while not so much a title as a more defining element than just capitalizing the beginning of your name, though it is taken as a title), or the Master(which is put up on a pedestal by some of us, myself included), something like, say a JourneyDom, if you will. If it becomes commonplace, I coined it, or that's what I'll tell everybody, atleast :)




Archer -> RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (6/19/2008 2:37:42 PM)

I have actually used the term Journeyman Dom before as a self label back a few years, in fact there is an "Academy" called Journeyman 3 Academy that operates out in Utah and California that has a pretty good reputation.




celticlord2112 -> RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (6/19/2008 3:07:47 PM)

Who declared me a master?  My slaves, and they are the only ones competent to do so.

Why do I use "Lord" in my online nick?  Simple: CelticLord sounds cool.




Darkeyes83 -> RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (6/19/2008 3:26:04 PM)

Dag nammit, never an original idea.




Lynnxz -> RE: Who declared you a Master/Dom? (6/19/2008 3:41:32 PM)

quote:

To borrow from Star Wars
  ... no you just didn't... [>:]


R only uses the term master with a few of the submissives he plays with. Personally, I feel he could get away with using it anywhere, since technically he has a Masters degree.

Personally, the only time I have a problem with it, is when the person introduces themselves to me, as Master/Sir/Captain Spanky, and demands that I say their full title when I address them. It's a little pretentious.




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