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If you had the opportunity to be in a BDSM article... - 6/23/2008 6:27:00 AM

TheGaggingWh0re

Posts: 222
Joined: 1/19/2006
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If the opportunity arose for you to be in an article detailing lifestyle BDSM, would you do it?
More importantly:
What are your limits on the article concerning your life?
What sort of things would you mention in the article(safety, local happenings, etc)?
Would you allow for a photo to be taken, and if so, of yourself engaging in the lifestyle, regular ol' you, or no picture?

Post #: 1

RE: If you had the opportunity to be in a BDSM article... - 6/23/2008 6:34:19 AM

RCdc

Posts: 8674
Status: offline

quote:

If the opportunity arose for you to be in an article detailing lifestyle BDSM, would you do it?

BDSM? Yes. Lifestyle? No. - Doesn't exist - only life happens.

quote:

More importantly:
What are your limits on the article concerning your life?

Depends on the context of the article and the publication.

quote:

What sort of things would you mention in the article(safety, local happenings, etc)?

Again, depends on the article. The question is vague too respond to really. You wouldn't discuss foot fetish in an article which was specifically about bondage for example.

quote:

Would you allow for a photo to be taken, and if so, of yourself engaging in the lifestyle, regular ol' you, or no picture?

Yes - whatever and depending on the context. We post images here. We have websites and participate on other sites and in other places. Depending on the context, publication or site - all are up for discussion.

the.dark.

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love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to TheGaggingWh0re)

Post #: 2

RE: If you had the opportunity to be in a BDSM article... - 6/23/2008 6:45:25 AM

VioletAshes

Posts: 101
Joined: 1/16/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheGaggingWh0re
If the opportunity arose for you to be in an article detailing lifestyle BDSM, would you do it?

Yes. I think it is important to engage people in the ideas of lifestyle BDSM as opposed to a few weekends here and there...
I write articles stressing this for several magazines and websites - collarme is where I come to relax... and play!!!

quote:

More importantly:
What are your limits on the article concerning your life?

My limits would surround my work and family life (the specifics of...)

quote:

What sort of things would you mention in the article(safety, local happenings, etc)?

The importance of equality in D/s relationships, Aftercare, local scene and how one begins such a relationship

quote:

Would you allow for a photo to be taken, and if so, of yourself engaging in the lifestyle, regular ol' you, or no picture?

I would allow my picture to be taken in almost any manner providing it was tasteful.

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(in reply to TheGaggingWh0re)

Post #: 3

RE: If you had the opportunity to be in a BDSM article... - 6/23/2008 6:51:40 AM

kiwisub12

Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline

Photo - no
Surname - no
Anything else - negotiable

(in reply to VioletAshes)

Post #: 4

RE: If you had the opportunity to be in a BDSM article... - 6/23/2008 7:00:00 AM

TheGaggingWh0re

Posts: 222
Joined: 1/19/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

quote:

More importantly:
What are your limits on the article concerning your life?

Depends on the context of the article and the publication.

I left that open on purpose for you to decide. Being too specific would mean leaving out a lot of people.

quote:

Again, depends on the article. The question is vague too respond to really. You wouldn't discuss foot fetish in an article which was specifically about bondage for example.

If you didn't want to, but again, I left this open for you to decide.

quote:

Yes - whatever and depending on the context. We post images here. We have websites and participate on other sites and in other places. Depending on the context, publication or site - all are up for discussion.

the.dark.

You'd be surprised! Some people, even on here, wouldn't step foot in, say, a discovery channel article about BDSM despite having pictures of their activities.

< Message edited by TheGaggingWh0re -- 6/23/2008 7:01:21 AM >

(in reply to RCdc)

Post #: 5

RE: If you had the opportunity to be in a BDSM article... - 6/23/2008 7:21:41 AM

RCdc

Posts: 8674
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheGaggingWh0re
You'd be surprised! Some people, even on here, wouldn't step foot in, say, a discovery channel article about BDSM despite having pictures of their activities.

Just to clear up the misunderstanding, when I said 'we' I meant us as a whole - not generic we - as this is a joint profile. Darcy and myself have websites, are active etc - I wasn't speaking for everyone in the 'we'.
I totally get that some people - while may have well thought out and obvious profiles on here that maybe a T.V. article might not be their thing. But we(us) are pretty out and not in the closet and neither are shy either but we both advocate exchange of knowledge.

the.dark.

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(in reply to TheGaggingWh0re)

Post #: 6

RE: If you had the opportunity to be in a BDSM article... - 6/23/2008 7:31:13 AM

GreedyTop

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From: Savannah, GA
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what thedark said

(hi, sexy! miss you!!! love to you both!)

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(in reply to RCdc)

Post #: 7

RE: If you had the opportunity to be in a BDSM article... - 6/23/2008 7:40:23 AM

azropedntied

Posts: 1829
Joined: 7/25/2005
From: Phx AZ
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nope i would not partake in any "lifestyle" writings as i am not in a lifestyle bdsm or otherwise , so the rest of the questions would be a big nope too . WELL SAID Darcy&the dark and i agree .

(in reply to GreedyTop)

Post #: 8

RE: If you had the opportunity to be in a BDSM article... - 6/23/2008 7:49:16 AM

Archer

Posts: 3207
Joined: 3/11/2005
Status: offline

Been interviewed a few times, written articles for scene related publications, had the picture printed in same publications.
Context etc would determine what I would be willing to discuss, show etc. Biggest problem would be the fact that reporters have a tendancy to reword things on their own to make the story better without regard for the person interviewed as a source.
Been there, done that, got misquoted/ spin/ sensationalized, LIED about what I said. Leaves me with a distinct distrust of the mainstream press in regards to interviews about BDSM.

(in reply to azropedntied)

Post #: 9

RE: If you had the opportunity to be in a BDSM article... - 6/23/2008 7:50:20 AM

beargonewild

Posts: 22716
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheGaggingWh0re

If the opportunity arose for you to be in an article detailing lifestyle BDSM, would you do it?
I would participate with the goal of helping to demystify and to help educate people.
More importantly:
What are your limits on the article concerning your life?
I'd probably omit any info regarding intimate details of my life, details which include family members and such. I think much would depend on the nature of the questions posed by the author.
What sort of things would you mention in the article(safety, local happenings, etc)?
Again this would depend on the nature of the questions the author asked.
Would you allow for a photo to be taken, and if so, of yourself engaging in the lifestyle, regular ol' you, or no picture?
I would have no issue regarding photos taken of myself engaging in this lifestyle.

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(in reply to TheGaggingWh0re)

Post #: 10

RE: If you had the opportunity to be in a BDSM article... - 6/23/2008 9:10:02 AM

fluffyswitch

Posts: 1108
Joined: 9/29/2007
From: Buffalo
Status: offline

fast reply--

academic study type article? yes in a heart beat because of all the IRB hoops that have to be jumped through, i know i would be okay.

popular culture type article? if it was a survey/internet survey type yes i've done it before for being poly, bisexual or poly/bi (helped that it was for a piece written in the UK as well). other type? i would have to think about it just to cover my rump in the future. i'm all for being out but i'm aware that it could be a tad...damaging depending on what i end up using my degrees for.

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Post #: 11

RE: If you had the opportunity to be in a BDSM article... - 6/23/2008 9:35:45 AM

RCdc

Posts: 8674
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

what thedark said

(hi, sexy! miss you!!! love to you both!)

WARNING -

Miss you too. We've been setting up the GT room at the new place... And the flamingos certainly give the place florida appeal...

the.dark.

_____________________________

RC&dc

love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to GreedyTop)

Post #: 12

RE: If you had the opportunity to be in a BDSM article... - 6/23/2008 9:44:01 AM

SteelofUtah

Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline

I already have, well in a way I have.

Power Exchange Magazine at one time was doing things Article wise and I was asked to do an article and since I wanted to talk about joining the lifestyle at a young ago 900 words just wasn't enough so I was going to do 12 parts and have it put in issue for issue over that year.

If you read my Journal you will find Parts 1-7 in my journal.

Eventually the Company when Chap Book Style and what I was doing no long worked for thier publication so instead of just stopping I kept writing, some of you on here have read it and left very nice comments, which I appreciate because I really do not see myself as a Writer I think I lack the proper scope and education and knowledge of words to be a writer also I have never been a fan of definitions. Anyway, I spent awhile on those 7 chapters and I plan on finishing the other 5 but I don't think it will be published. If it is however I will use the name that I am known by in the community "Steel" and I will use my own picture nothing of the activities I engage in because doing so could be construed in a way I am not comfortable with, but I would have no issue with it.

There are things I think that people who do engage in articles should do though. I don't think anyone should ever state things as an "End All Be All" I believe it is important to remind people whenever given the venue that there are no real set rules here and that just because I say I do this or that this way does not mean it cannot be done just as efficently in another way.

Steel

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(in reply to fluffyswitch)

Post #: 13

RE: If you had the opportunity to be in a BDSM article... - 6/23/2008 10:06:46 AM

CalifChick

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

No way. In every single article (for any topic) that I've ever been involved in, I've been misquoted or taken out of context (unless I was writing the entire article myself). It always seemed like the author was looking for something to back up a particular idea, and just pulled out anything that supported it.

The most recent example, which pissed me off the most, had my full name and city and state, and was from a forum that I moderate (they also have a print magazine). I did post the lengthy paragraph they quoted, but they conveniently left off my opening sentence, in which I stated, "There are two sides to the argument, the most traditional one being...." and they picked it up after that. So it looked like that was my opinion, when in fact it wasn't, and I said so later in my post.

Cali

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(in reply to SteelofUtah)

Post #: 14

RE: If you had the opportunity to be in a BDSM article... - 6/23/2008 10:28:32 AM

JoePNY707

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Joined: 6/4/2008
Status: offline

I'd say it would depend on the writer. I met someone at a party a few years back, and it came up that I worked at a swing club shortly after getting out of college. She instantly wanted to 'do an article' on the subject, but whenever I'd discuss something interesting, she'd interrupt with "that won't sell--give me kinky or weird stuff"

I finally had to tell her to take a hike....

On the other hand, if I had someone whom I trusted to be objective, I'd be glad to help.

(Since I'm a occasional writer myself, I may just end up doing something myself! LOL)

(in reply to CalifChick)

Post #: 15

RE: If you had the opportunity to be in a BDSM article... - 6/23/2008 10:46:22 AM

LaTigresse

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Joined: 1/15/2006
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I cannot imagine that anyone would really be all that interested in anything I have to say on the topic.

If they insisted, and wanted a photo........ONLY if I have my own graphic designer photoshop it!!!!!!!!!!!!

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My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to TheGaggingWh0re)

Post #: 16

RE: If you had the opportunity to be in a BDSM article... - 6/23/2008 10:49:36 AM

KatyLied

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Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

I have nothing of interest to share on the "lifestyle" topic. The "lifestyle" is just one little piece of who I am. And it's not the most important part. I think I would have more to say about marriage/divorce, single-parenting, leisure time, things like that, I feel that those things speak more directly to who I am and how I live.

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Post #: 17

RE: If you had the opportunity to be in a BDSM article... - 6/23/2008 11:02:00 AM

Stephann

Posts: 4214
Joined: 12/27/2006
From: Portland, OR
Status: offline

I think the underlying question is "how open are you, about your lifestyle choices."

Some people are very outspoken about what they enjoy and who they are. Others are incredibly private, and almost secretive about their interests. Neither way is particularly right or wrong.

For my part, I'm quite open about myself. Personally, I don't have a career or family at risk from my interests. charlotte & I actually had a recent issue, where one of her cousins googled me and found out about her modeling career, and outted her to her family about it. It's been quite emotionally distressing for her; but it wasn't something we were completely unprepared for. At least, in part, it's been a huge weight off our shoulders about her family 'finding out'; now that they have, it's not something we have to be concerned about.

I think the bottom line, is how comfortable you are in having members of your family and community knowing or finding out about what you enjoy in the privacy of your home.

Stephan

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Post #: 18

RE: If you had the opportunity to be in a BDSM article... - 6/23/2008 11:26:51 AM

Prinsexx

Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TheGaggingWh0re

If the opportunity arose for you to be in an article detailing lifestyle BDSM, would you do it?

Yes but it would depend on the publisher and the angle. I have been asked a few times and always rurned it down because their human interest angle was the same old same old attempt to marginalised bdsm activities and to present the so-called lifestyle as in opposition to 'straight' society.

quote:

More importantly:
What are your limits on the article concerning your life?

There are no limits to people knowing other than that all encompassing concept called appropriate. Now I define who and what is appropriate to talk about about me but once a life is out in the mass media then there is absolutely no control. As long as I were editorially allowed to talk about the medium being the message then that would be the deal.

quote:

What sort of things would you mention in the article(safety, local happenings, etc)?

Since my activities are only ever private and I never club it or go to gatherings or munches then I wouldn't want to nor could i mention the 'scene;. Anyway that information is all pretty available. from experience emotional masochism is a draw. An article i turned down was about how I had once been addicted to emotional masochism but had 'reformed'...... that was the angle. If I simply had a chance to get the questions ahead of time then I would be guided by those questions.

quote:

Would you allow for a photo to be taken, and if so, of yourself engaging in the lifestyle, regular ol' you, or no picture?

Oh yes yes yes pics please. I am a social diva on the surface. But most jobbing photographers aren't that creative when they come attached to a jounalist and i think that's a waste of creativity. One of my secret ambitions....not so secret now lol....is to be included in a book of bdsm photographs. Before i die or grow too old to be 'seen' I would really love that......messed up as well. Tear stained faces make good copy eh?

< Message edited by Prinsexx -- 6/23/2008 11:28:58 AM >

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Post #: 19

RE: If you had the opportunity to be in a BDSM article... - 6/23/2008 12:06:13 PM

LadyHugs

Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Dear TheGaggingWh0re, Ladies and Gentlemen;

I have been a feature of two articles.

One was in the paper called "City Paper" in the 1990's and the other; The Washington Blade, June 20, 1997 with photograph of me in 'action' per se. I did not get a courtesy copy from City Paper, so I am not sure if my photo is in there also; if so--it would be the double single tail scene or six floggers whip work; with a lad I know in Charlottesville, Virginia and his Daddy; as they waited for me to be free to experience 'single tail' for the first time. He had not received a courtesy paper either.

Both articles were done while I was presenting for a dear friend and Master who produced both Leather events; to which the newspapers were invited in prior to the events.

Because both papers are "Gay" Community friendly papers; they were much kinder than any other mainstream newspapers about.

The other interview was the German Community Interview; to which did a taping for a live television broadcast and had me in an hour interview. With 'snips' of me in some activities that were not 'offensive' by any standard. The interview was in the early 1990's. Aired in Germany.

That said, speaking for myself -- I would only give my honorific title or moniker as a means of identity, with vague address and or Post Office Box, and E-mail. I do not discuss my private life, or my slave's business.

I would also never say anything that would be twisted or skewed to fit some position the newspaper wants to make a stand on. I have been known to write my response on paper with carbon in the middle; as to have an immediate copy--that way they can't fudge on my response as it was written. Now, that was in the old days LOL; now days; I cannot see the harm in recording the interview yourself with your own mobile cell phone; especially if it has camera/video features and send it immediately to a friend and yourself; this way--little can be said should you produce proof of the interview with your own copy made at the same time. If they decline this ability to record the interview--don't speak. If they can't be free to allow you to back yourself up like that--then don't. You may also see if a buddy will record the interview on the side for you--like witnessing the interview. Have him send to buddies who you both can trust and speak up if necessary as to show the skewed newspaper/television story.

And, as simple as it is--it is invaluable. Follow your own gut instincts.

Just some thoughts.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

< Message edited by LadyHugs -- 6/23/2008 12:13:27 PM >

(in reply to TheGaggingWh0re)

Post #: 20

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