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submisive depression and over comming it - 11/5/2005 9:59:16 AM   
AlderTheKitty


Posts: 174
Joined: 10/3/2005
From: Oshawa
Status: offline 		how many submissives have felt allone and un fofilled when they have no one to please and became depressed well their are a few things you can.

go to munches and other socal outings and see your freind
curl up with a stuffed animal lol yeah it's lame i know but it helps at night
keep busy if you let your self feel lonely then you will be

these are mine what are yours

_____________________________

i am a strong person and will not be pushed around which makes my submission a special gift that few are going to receave
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RE: submisive depression and over comming it - 11/5/2005 1:47:06 PM   
justjenn


Posts: 9
Joined: 10/30/2005
Status: offline 		Munches are a great idea, and sometimes chatrooms and online friendships can really help, as well.

I still slept with a stuffed animal when my Master was working second shift, because the bed felt too lonely without him. I agree - it sounds silly, but it does help!

You can also turn to R/L friends for comfort. Nothing is ever as comforting as someone who understands what you're going through, even if they aren't going through it with you.

(in reply to AlderTheKitty)
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RE: submisive depression and over comming it - 11/5/2005 2:21:32 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Great ideas so far, lots of other threads on this too.

I allow myself to be depressed sometimes and then move on.


(in reply to AlderTheKitty)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: submisive depression and over comming it - 11/5/2005 8:47:37 PM   
MastersPet46


Posts: 9
Joined: 10/24/2005
Status: offline 		First I want to say.. Lucky Albatross.. I am so impressed with the advice you give.. You say things soo perfect and direct and helpful.. Why werent you around when I needed a freind going through a few issues.. you really have a good head and mind .. Its rare to see at times.. Now , I may be wrong.. but this same situation happened to me.. I was basicly burned out. I had been n lifestyle for so long and a peice of me was dying.. I didnt know how to fix it.. I did as Albatros said.. allow yourself the emotion.. and deal with the feeings. But being submissive beleive it or not does take a drain on your emotional self.. And like anything else yuo need time to reboot your heart your emotions and your inner self of how you change. Its all a matter of regrouping and moving on with changes .. And ohh yeah.. having a stuffed animal to snuggle never hurt anyone :) Be well..

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
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RE: submisive depression and over comming it - 11/6/2005 8:35:27 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Wow thanks much, glad it can help.

(in reply to MastersPet46)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: submisive depression and over comming it - 11/7/2005 2:12:30 PM   
ropesubby39


Posts: 112
Joined: 9/30/2005
Status: offline 		It happened to me at one time, but i made the big mistake of turning to a friend who made it all worst for me. In those times, you can be so vulnerable, but my Dom rescued me and made me smile again. *Thanks Sir for being my angel*

ropesubby

(in reply to AlderTheKitty)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: submisive depression and over comming it - 11/7/2005 5:00:08 PM   
Sensualips


Posts: 1013
Joined: 10/8/2005
Status: offline 		That is very fortunate someone was there for you and this is not a criticism of that. However, I prefer to be able to "rescue" myself.

I would think depression w/in this context is similar to depression outside, sometimes situational and sometimes physiological.

Establish and stick to routines, particularly productive actions like exercise, etc. . Interact with people, even if it is breifly and you are worried "I am just no good to be around right now." Don't let household chores or other small task pile up until they seem overwhelming. If you are overwhelmed, break things into smaller tasks and slowly make your way through the list. Eat reasonably healthy foods, even if you don't feel like it.

Recognize patterns in your mood or "triggers" and rearrange things to help combat this. If you become depressed at night before bed, plan activities for that time.

Allow yourself to feel depressed but don't let it envelop you forever. Force yourself to take action. And don't expect you can just will yourself out of it in a short period of time.

For a submissive personality, perhaps finding a way to feel needed would help? Taking care of pets or even a plant? Offering to do something for someone else and following through with it?

Personally I like to write or cook. I usually cook some decadant dessert and then eat way too much, so perhaps no one should follow my lead. Oh, and I masturbate.

Of course. if you have a major depressive disorder, that is entirely different.

(in reply to ropesubby39)
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RE: submisive depression and over comming it - 11/7/2005 5:50:45 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		It usually helps to do things outside of yourself. Helping others, being involved in things. I've always believed that writing can help - getting your thoughts out of your head and onto a sheet of paper is good therapy. Stream of conscious writing exercise is good - just let the words and thoughts flow. And a brief pity party, if you must, because the release of tears is good too.

(in reply to Sensualips)
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RE: submisive depression and over comming it - 11/7/2005 6:17:13 PM   
MasterEsqMDsgirl


Posts: 26
Joined: 10/30/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AlderTheKitty

how many submissives have felt allone and un fofilled when they have no one to please and became depressed well their are a few things you can.

go to munches and other socal outings and see your freind
curl up with a stuffed animal lol yeah it's lame i know but it helps at night
keep busy if you let your self feel lonely then you will be

these are mine what are yours


This sound corny to some but - i give of myself in other directions which have nothing to do with intimacy. it doesn't totally remedy the void but for me, but it does help. if one truly wishes to please, it can be done in so many forms such as spending time with senior citizens, complimenting a total stranger, letting someone cut in front of you in the grocery store, reaching out to others, etc.

If one is looking for something more lifestyle oriented - if your local scene doesn't already have one create a "subs without partners" support group/munch or spend this time reflecting, learning and growing and defining yourself as a person and as a submissive.








_____________________________

To endure for Owner's pleasures is the trait of a submissive, but to derive pleasure from that endurance because it is pleasing to ones OWNER is the trait of a slave.


(in reply to AlderTheKitty)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: submisive depression and over comming it - 11/7/2005 6:48:33 PM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

how many submissives have felt allone and un fofilled when they have no one to please and became depressed well their are a few things you can.


There is no reason in the world why you would'nt have anything to do. All you have to do is offer yourself up to a charity. They can use you more time than you have to be used.
Work on yourself, exercise? Meditation. Education. There are so many different idea's. Don't focus on yourself so much and just start focusing on something more productive.
Before you know it your mind will be busy and you won't be feeling so ill anymore.

(in reply to AlderTheKitty)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: submisive depression and over comming it - 11/7/2005 7:25:23 PM   
MasterEsqMDsgirl


Posts: 26
Joined: 10/30/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sub4hire

quote:

how many submissives have felt allone and un fofilled when they have no one to please and became depressed well their are a few things you can.


There is no reason in the world why you would'nt have anything to do. All you have to do is offer yourself up to a charity. They can use you more time than you have to be used.
Work on yourself, exercise? Meditation. Education. There are so many different idea's. Don't focus on yourself so much and just start focusing on something more productive.
Before you know it your mind will be busy and you won't be feeling so ill anymore.





i totally agree! it is too easy to get into a tail spin of self pity - welcome the time as a positive chapter in your life and make your future Master proud of you and your accomplishments.

_____________________________

To endure for Owner's pleasures is the trait of a submissive, but to derive pleasure from that endurance because it is pleasing to ones OWNER is the trait of a slave.


(in reply to sub4hire)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: submisive depression and over comming it - 11/7/2005 11:13:15 PM   
michaelMI


Posts: 421
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		i have lived with depression so long that my name should be Depressed. munches mya be a good outlet for some of it, provided you live in an area where transportation is not a problem or can afford a vehicle in some way, shape or form.

i have found it impossible to attend munches in my area as i do not own a car and don't know anyone here that i could get a ride with.

as for not having someone to serve, that doesn't stop the depression either. it might if the distance wasn't a factor. not everyone can afford to travel and locally, it's near impossible to maintain a relationship in the lifestyle...if you're lucky enough to find "the one" locally.

thus far, meds nor therapy has had any affect on me and i've been suffering from this for over 20 years...there's not magic cure...trust me.

(in reply to MasterEsqMDsgirl)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: submisive depression and over comming it - 11/8/2005 11:17:01 AM   
Destinysskeins


Posts: 267
Joined: 7/1/2004
Status: offline 		Volunteer!!! It helps express your desire for servitude in a worthwhile and meaningful fashion. Also, most volunteering experiences help you see that whatever the underlying cause for your depression, it could be worse!

(in reply to michaelMI)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: submisive depression and over comming it - 11/9/2005 6:55:00 AM   
Belladonna82


Posts: 171
Joined: 7/14/2005
Status: offline 		Depression hits alot of submissive/slaves i've got to talk to....hell its hit me.Depression sometimes goes hand and hand in this lifestyle because many live to serve...which is the wrong way to be...yes you should love to serve but if you cant it shouldent distroy you..When Master moved us from Mississippi to New Orleans La i left my job...my school..everything and Master decided he'd rather me by his side while he managed the swingers club....Dont get me wrong i like the idea but he is the Manager and i am the slave....He has to do so much of the work via Owners orders that normaly i have nothing to do and feel useless....but i found out quickly it acctualy opened my life....while i serve Master at the homested.......i can go do what i want...lol well Blessed be

_____________________________

Blessed be!

(in reply to Destinysskeins)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: submisive depression and over comming it - 11/9/2005 7:23:58 AM   
solaria


Posts: 3
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline 		something many seem to have over looked in way of advice about depression. I too suffer from bouts of depression at times and find that it can be linked to lack of rest. It's a horrible cycle. The key is rest but not too much rest. Eating healthy and physical activity will help stimulate the bodies chemicals to build energy as well. Music can also affect your mood, if you want to bring an upbeat mood listen to upbeat music. Do something for yourself, no one said you had to serve another to feel good or needed. Okay I'll step down from my soap box now as I sound as if I'm preaching... if you would like more ideas and advice about overcoming depression just ask I'll be happy to help....

(in reply to AlderTheKitty)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: submisive depression and over comming it - 11/29/2005 9:47:47 PM   
subbella


Posts: 237
Status: offline 		This is something I have had to deal with on an ongoing basis. Today, my depression can be linked to nicotine withdrawal and I have been an all out basket case! I think that reaching out and helping others can be a great relief for all the depressed souls out there. These Message boards are a great example of that.

_____________________________

Music, Magic, and Mystery are the muses that inspire her artwork and her life.

SUBMISSION . . . it isn't her pasttime, it's her calling.

subbella

(in reply to solaria)
Profile   Post #: 16
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