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RE: Introducing Girlfriend? - 6/26/2008 9:26:33 PM

malloves69

Posts: 913
Joined: 9/15/2006
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hope i tickle you the good way Ms Starlett

saw my mistress wednesday and she first used her strapons on me then she fisted me 3 times

gawd i love when she fists me ..first time she slides in is amazing

love a lady in control

mal .she is a awesome woman indeed

(in reply to katie978)

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RE: Introducing Girlfriend? - 6/29/2008 11:45:57 AM

GigglingGoddess

Posts: 31
Joined: 6/14/2008
Status: offline

About 9 months ago, my boyfriend was in the same situation as you. He also started a topic like yours, so searching for that might help (the post will be by sleuthingsub). Some of the suggestions in this thread have been good, some have been bad. DON'T buy her a strap-on. It'll probably just freak her out. What I might suggest, and what my boyfriend did, is just be honest with her. Don't rush her into it, but when the time is right just talk to her. Tell her that you realize she seems to prefer the submissive role right now, but that you're also interested in being submissive and having her take control. It seems you've been saying some of the right things, but she may not be taking the hints or she's scared. Society has taught her to be submissive, after all. Tell her you think it's sexy when she's in control, and maybe ask her if she could try tying you up, or just be on top for once. You might have to tie her up the first time, and have her do it the next time. Don't do anything extreme, but if you start slow, she might begin to pick it up. It may even be emotional a few times (it was for me), because she thinks she's doing something wrong or she gets stuck at some point. Make sure you don't neglect aftercare and talk about it with her. Another thing that helped me was Akasha's guides (like the one she posted). If your girlfriend has a dominant side, it won't come out full throttle right away, but if she's anything like me, she'll grow into it more and more. You just have to be patient. And keep in mind that some people just don't have a dominant side. Good luck!

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RE: Introducing Girlfriend? - 6/29/2008 12:12:31 PM

GigglingGoddess

Posts: 31
Joined: 6/14/2008
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just wanted to add two points:
1. I really hope GracefulDevotion is being sarcastic. Either way, bad advice.
2. If you talk to her and it sparks an interest, or if she's open-minded but unsure, Akasha's "Good Girl's Guide" really helped me. Most girls have mental images of the leather-clad, order-shouting dominatrix from porn (or Eurotrip). Akasha dispells these misconceptions and instructs both people in the relationship on how to approach and think about power exchange in ways that will make it enjoyable for both. Your girlfriend needs to know she can take it at her own pace and you have to be patient. However, she might look to you for help, which you can give, but try not to cross the line of "topping from the bottom." Hopefully that will work for you like it did for me.

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Post #: 23

RE: Introducing Girlfriend? - 6/29/2008 1:30:17 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
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Yes, I hate to say it, but I agree with GG up there. DON'T buy her a strap-on. It never ceases to amaze Me how the male thinks that's a 'gift' for the female as an introduction. That's not a gift for her. That's a gift for you.

Please take some of the advice in the "Good Girl's Guide" to heart. A huge key to doing this is NOT overwhelming her or freaking her out. I realize that you might have wanted this so much and for so long that you can almost taste it, but you have to remember that she might not be in the same place as you. Go slow. Even if she is in the same place, nothing's going to be harmed by taking the path slowly.

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The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

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(in reply to GigglingGoddess)

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RE: Introducing Girlfriend? - 6/29/2008 4:52:28 PM

PsyVamp

Posts: 1026
Joined: 10/30/2006
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Be careful what you wish for...
Once upon a time, long long ago... yadada yadada... a boyfriend of mine wanted to re introduce me to my dominant side..
heh
What he really wanted was a kinky girlfriend... but he woke a sleeping Mistress... two different animals entirely...
Needless to say... he is long gone.

Lady Jag

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Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive. .
Could a blue screen of death constitute being defenestrated?
~Owner of wolf~ (one of them, anyway)

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Post #: 25