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RE: Dom Profiles vs. Email - 6/28/2008 10:46:08 AM

candystripper

Posts: 3486
Joined: 11/1/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: colouredin

See i personally DONT like profiles that simply list what they want, and im pretty sure that even if i was looking for 'the one' a list of stuff wouldnt bring me closer to knowing anything about them.

Relationships are based on learing about the person, asking questions and getting to know them, if you dont like asking questions you probably wont much like a relationship. My profile says nothing about the 'type' of person i want because my experiance has been that my type and i dont tend to stay in a relationship or else i wouldnt be single now would i.

Coloredin, if you mean profies that say things like 'I like bondage, wax, breast play, anal, oral, and every other kink or fetish I've ever heard of' I couldn't agree more. I'm not looking for a play partner; I'm looking for a collar -- so I want to know about the man, not his D/s 'checklist'.

BTW, ever had a Dom send you one of those to fill out? I have -- about 75 items, which I was to mark on a scale of 1 to 5, as to whether I had done it yet or had an interest in it, etc.

Sorta like a D/s census taker, LOL.

candystripper

(in reply to colouredin)

Post #: 21

RE: Dom Profiles vs. Email - 6/28/2008 10:51:39 AM

candystripper

Posts: 3486
Joined: 11/1/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyRainfire

quote:

ORIGINAL: colouredin

See i personally DONT like profiles that simply list what they want, and im pretty sure that even if i was looking for 'the one' a list of stuff wouldnt bring me closer to knowing anything about them.

Relationships are based on learing about the person, asking questions and getting to know them, if you dont like asking questions you probably wont much like a relationship. My profile says nothing about the 'type' of person i want because my experiance has been that my type and i dont tend to stay in a relationship or else i wouldnt be single now would i.

I tend to agree, colouredin. In fact, I was about to respond and say that I believe that while a profile is a good starting point in finding out if you have some common grounds or interests with someone, that doesn't tell you who they are or if you'd even like them. I love to knit, sew, cook, read and many other things that are listed on my profile. Does it mean that I'm going to like every single person just because they like to read or cook too? No. So why not take the time to just get to know someone as friend and see what happens? Starting as friends, expecting nothing more, can have some unexpected, delicious outcomes. It's how Lumus and I met here on the boards, and not by searching the profiles.

Oh - and SOO? Check this out.....

*Sighs* People on the boards have a sense of superiority over people who stay on the other side now? Gheesh.

But I wish you many, many happy years with Lumus, LadyRainfire. He seems like a fine man.

candystripper

(in reply to LadyRainfire)

Post #: 22

RE: Dom Profiles vs. Email - 6/28/2008 11:23:55 AM

variation30

Posts: 1190
Joined: 12/1/2007
From: Alabama
Status: offline

quote:

'I liked your profile.' (No details provided. The damned thing is an essay -- what pray tell did you like about it?)

Followed by:

'Please read mine; I think you'll like it too.'

I'm going to try this hot line out and see how it works.

_____________________________

all the good ones are collared or lesbians.

or old.

(in reply to candystripper)

Post #: 23

RE: Dom Profiles vs. Email - 6/28/2008 11:35:12 AM

candystripper

Posts: 3486
Joined: 11/1/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: dovie

candystripper,

just curious...........was your other screen name "pinksugarsub" or the like? your pattern is oddly like hers.

dovie

Yes dovie.

http://www.collarchat.com/m_1961881/tm.htm

canddystripper

(in reply to dovie)

Post #: 24

RE: Dom Profiles vs. Email - 6/28/2008 1:50:53 PM

solia

Posts: 115
Joined: 8/1/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: HeavansKeeper

quote:

ORIGINAL: dovie

candystripper,

just curious...........was your other screen name "pinksugarsub" or the like? your pattern is oddly like hers.

dovie

You know this is the way synced mensies starts, right?

I think that I peed a little bit while laughing hysterically at this .. must go change now!

(in reply to HeavansKeeper)

Post #: 25

RE: Dom Profiles vs. Email - 6/28/2008 1:55:38 PM

Lumus

Posts: 5968
Joined: 9/16/2007
Status: offline

Well, now, if we gave out the form letter without filling in the blanks, you'd catch on.

~LurkieLoo

_____________________________

<Talk to educate; listen to learn.>

~ the other half of "L&L" ~

I have been dubbed the Rainmaker. Do not make me take your water for my tribe.

(in reply to candystripper)

Post #: 26

RE: Dom Profiles vs. Email - 6/28/2008 2:17:37 PM

beargonewild

Posts: 22716
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: candystripper

quote:

ORIGINAL: colouredin

See i personally DONT like profiles that simply list what they want, and im pretty sure that even if i was looking for 'the one' a list of stuff wouldnt bring me closer to knowing anything about them.

Relationships are based on learing about the person, asking questions and getting to know them, if you dont like asking questions you probably wont much like a relationship. My profile says nothing about the 'type' of person i want because my experiance has been that my type and i dont tend to stay in a relationship or else i wouldnt be single now would i.

Coloredin, if you mean profies that say things like 'I like bondage, wax, breast play, anal, oral, and every other kink or fetish I've ever heard of' I couldn't agree more. I'm not looking for a play partner; I'm looking for a collar -- so I want to know about the man, not his D/s 'checklist'.

BTW, ever had a Dom send you one of those to fill out? I have -- about 75 items, which I was to mark on a scale of 1 to 5, as to whether I had done it yet or had an interest in it, etc.

Sorta like a D/s census taker, LOL.

candystripper

Without passing judgement, have a look at the other side of the coin, so to speak.
When a dom states right off what kinks they are into and what they don't like, isn't that letting you know up front about these things? Whether you realize it or not, during the "getting to know" stage, we all give our D/s checklist to a potential dom or sub and they do the same. It's what you call getting to know what the other person likes/dislikes. You'll carry a discussion about who you are as a person, what your likes/dislikes, wants, needs, what your looking for in a person, etc. these are a checklist also.

_____________________________

Do Not Rile da Chosen Bear

Promiscuous boy you already know
That I’m all yours what you waiting for?

Resident MANWHORE ~1000 Bear pts~

10 NZ points
Whips~n~Cuffs

(in reply to candystripper)

Post #: 27

RE: Dom Profiles vs. Email - 6/28/2008 3:37:18 PM

colouredin

Posts: 4279
Joined: 2/2/2007
Status: offline

Well from reading peoples posts on here and then reading their profiles i have gotta say i dont see the link for many, seriously. You write certain things on a profile, for whatever reason but they arent always how you present yourself, in fact most people seem to come off as far less on their profiles than in forums.

Bear dunno if that was to me, and yeah sure we all say what we like and dont like, well actually ask many of the people I know what i like few people will have a clue thats mostly because i dont reel them off, course you talk about them but if i said i like something i may hate it with that person so i try to start with a blank a canvas as i can.

_____________________________

Resident Lime(y) Tart
There would be no gossip without secrets
I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELvfMJoKDAk

(in reply to beargonewild)

Post #: 28

RE: Dom Profiles vs. Email - 6/28/2008 5:26:27 PM

LadyRainfire

Posts: 6040
Joined: 2/20/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: candystripper

*Sighs* People on the boards have a sense of superiority over people who stay on the other side now? Gheesh.

But I wish you many, many happy years with Lumus, LadyRainfire. He seems like a fine man.

candystripper

I really don't appreciate it when people put words in my mouth or make insinuations about me that are false. I've never claimed a sense of superiority over anyone, let alone you. Where you got that impression from my post is beyond my understanding. You claim to not like it when people pass judgement on you yet you are awfully fast to judge other people and find them lacking. I made no comment whatsoever about staying on the other side but merely stated that Lumus and I met here on the forums, starting as friends. Anyone who knows us knows we met in the Polls and Random Stupidity section of the forums. I merely offered one viewpoint of how people have met and found a wonderful partner here on CM, perhaps letting you know that there is more than one way of looking for that "One" you seek.

The whole point of the thread, which you addressed to "you lovely men" discounting (if not disrepecting) the female segment of CollarMe, was about profiles and the information people do, or do not, put on them, and how that can affect initial communication. I made the point that profiles are good for a look-see, for a person to see what they might have in common with someone, or if there is something there that absolutely goes against everything a person stands for. Profiles are a starting point to get to know someone. If you choose to move forward is totally up to you, no one is making you look at profiles or answer cmails as you well know.

One thing I've learned over the years of working in customer service is that when customers keep complaining or having bad attitudes towards me, it's time for an attitude check of my own. Maybe you'd better look in the mirror and do your own attitude check.

And thanks for the wishes, he is a wonderful man and we're very happy together.

< Message edited by LadyRainfire -- 6/28/2008 5:27:31 PM >

_____________________________

"Desire is an insatiable beast. Sample your strongest dreams, and you will only crave more." ~ Master

~ one half of "L&L"~

My current state of mind

(in reply to candystripper)

Post #: 29

RE: Dom Profiles vs. Email - 6/28/2008 7:22:03 PM

HeavansKeeper

Posts: 1254
Joined: 5/14/2007
Status: offline

=) I'm flattered.

_____________________________

The Loving Owner of HisHeavan

... You've waited your whole life for this moment...

(in reply to candystripper)

Post #: 30

RE: Dom Profiles vs. Email - 6/28/2008 8:20:20 PM

beargonewild

Posts: 22716
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: colouredin

Well from reading peoples posts on here and then reading their profiles i have gotta say i dont see the link for many, seriously. You write certain things on a profile, for whatever reason but they arent always how you present yourself, in fact most people seem to come off as far less on their profiles than in forums.

Bear dunno if that was to me, and yeah sure we all say what we like and dont like, well actually ask many of the people I know what i like few people will have a clue thats mostly because i dont reel them off, course you talk about them but if i said i like something i may hate it with that person so i try to start with a blank a canvas as i can.

I see your point and for the most part I do agree with you colouredin, I'm also looking at this from a POV that having someone send a list of things they are into then it does make it a bit easier to see if your interests are compatible in some fashion.

Granted for a person to blindly send a letter with a long list, I'd question the fact that it's a case of too much info too soon. Yes that may not be an appropriate method to approach someone yet there are people who can't be bothered with the small talk and prefer to get right down to the nitty gritty and allow everything else fall in place at such time that happens.

_____________________________

Do Not Rile da Chosen Bear

Promiscuous boy you already know
That I’m all yours what you waiting for?

Resident MANWHORE ~1000 Bear pts~

10 NZ points
Whips~n~Cuffs

(in reply to colouredin)

Post #: 31

RE: Dom Profiles vs. Email - 6/28/2008 8:30:28 PM

Leatherist

Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline

I don't post much about my actual life ambitions and such.....because I find very few women here are actually interested in HOW a man makes a living-just that he has money.

Whereas-what interests me in a woman is how well she can be of service and intimacy overall. Something almost none of them ever bother to mention. The majority seem to whine about the fakes and players and what they don't want-and what they expect.

But seldom venture the slightest clue about what they have to offer that is going to make it worth bothering with the obstacle courses they create. Usually it's some sort of face or nudie shot-and I can find that in any bar scene.

And if they start braying about the gift of submission, or not being a doormat yadda yadda.....I just think "insecure bitch", and move along.

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to beargonewild)

Post #: 32

RE: Dom Profiles vs. Email - 6/28/2008 8:37:13 PM

xxblushesxx

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

If someone reads back through my gods how many posts-they will get the gist of me.

I do not package it neatly in a few paragraphs for fast food consumption. Maybe the others feel they should not be seen as conveniece items as well?

I agree with this. I have often told people that if they really want to know what I'm like, read some of my posts. In fact, if you really ARE interested in me, you would be interested in what my views are on things, and how I express those views. It's funny the amount of 'interested' people who can't be bothered. They just want to know if I enjoy anal, and if I'll wear (insert fetish item here).

*grammar edit*

< Message edited by xxblushesxx -- 6/28/2008 8:44:50 PM >

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com

(in reply to Leatherist)

Post #: 33

RE: Dom Profiles vs. Email - 6/28/2008 8:42:58 PM

Thadius

Posts: 5091
Joined: 10/11/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx

quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

If someone reads back through my gods how many posts-they will get the gist of me.

I do not package it neatly in a few paragraphs for fast food consumption. Maybe the others feel they should not be seen as conveniece items as well?

I agree with this. I have often told people that if they really want to know what I'm like, read some of my posts. In fact, if you really ARE interested in me, you would be interested in what my view is on things, and how I express that view. It's funny the amount of 'interested' people who can't be bothered. They just want to know if I enjoy anal, and if I'll wear (insert fetish item here).

Actually, that is how I choose who I am even interested in perving, their posts. If somebody can't communicate their thoughts and beliefs here, odds are they won't be able to do so face to face. I don't even look down on bad grammar and spelling (mine could use improvements), if the person can at least make their thoughts clear and interesting.

Speaking of which, I have alot of perving to do, so please excuse me.

_____________________________

When the character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends." ~ Japanese Proverb

(in reply to xxblushesxx)

Post #: 34

RE: Dom Profiles vs. Email - 6/28/2008 9:05:52 PM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: variation30

quote:

'I liked your profile.' (No details provided. The damned thing is an essay -- what pray tell did you like about it?)

Followed by:

'Please read mine; I think you'll like it too.'

I'm going to try this hot line out and see how it works.

Send it to someone like me, and chances are she'd never get past your pic ;)

(yummy)

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to variation30)

Post #: 35

RE: Dom Profiles vs. Email - 6/28/2008 9:09:44 PM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

Send it to someone like me, and chances are she'd never get past your pic ;)

(yummy)

*sobs*

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to GreedyTop)

Post #: 36

RE: Dom Profiles vs. Email - 6/28/2008 9:10:33 PM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

LMAO!!

(hey.. it's a hot pic, what can I say??)

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to RedMagic1)

Post #: 37

RE: Dom Profiles vs. Email - 6/29/2008 7:58:23 AM

kc692

Posts: 3701
Joined: 3/24/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyRainfire

I'm not the OP but yes, it was, dovie.... As well as pinkieplum. There might be other names as well.

Here is the list...

http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=1934628

(at least in part....I am not Sherlock Holmes, lol)

_____________________________

Anyone can overpower; not many can INSPIRE.....

This is only MY opinion. If it's not yours, let's agree in advance to agree to disagree, OR, you can just get the fuck over what I had to say:)

(in reply to LadyRainfire)

Post #: 38

RE: Dom Profiles vs. Email - 6/29/2008 11:04:03 AM

CalifChick

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline

You have to wonder, when someone presents themselves a certain way in the forums, and the truth of their life is so completely opposite (because there ARE people that know the truth), if they really believe the false picture they paint, or if they think no one will call them on their bullshit, or if there are really more people residing in one brain than it should comfortably hold.

I'm not talking about "soft" traits that are subject to interpretation, such as being sweet, or kind, or nice. I'm talking about things like saying that you brought certain people together (when in fact you went around trying to gather supporters to blackball people that would not kowtow to you), taking credit for an idea when it was being discussed before you ever mentioned it, saying that you follow a certain honor code when in fact you use it as a mask to hide behind.

Oh by the way, this was not about the person who started this thread, but an observation on my previously-held belief that for people on the forum side, the truth eventually comes out. Some people are so good at deception that the truth may never come out in the forums.

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to kc692)

Post #: 39

RE: Dom Profiles vs. Email - 6/29/2008 11:17:22 AM

xxblushesxx

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

Oh crap, Cali. Send me a c-mail. (I'm so nosy) *lol*

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com

(in reply to CalifChick)

Post #: 40

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